There are two things that have stuck with me this weekend. The first of them being our elevators here at WYSP. I’m not quite sure of the inner workings of an elevator, but I’m pretty sure the screeching of metal on metal is not by design. Maybe I’m wrong. Let’s do a quick survey. Do the elevators at your workplace sound like a Velociraptor is mating on the roof? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

 

Maybe I’m approaching the situation all wrong. It’s kind of like a ride. My own personal Tower Of Terror. I should enjoy this perk! My only fear is that one of these days I will not be let out in the gift shop to purchase my commemorative t-shirt, but rather the basement with paramedics prying a LOBBY button out of my chest.  

 

On a much lighter note, I can’t seem to shake the thought of Ben Franklin’s marriage this week. In case you missed it I will catch you up. Here in the historic section of Philly there are people that dress and act as though it were still 1776. They are very authentic, unless you catch them drinking Starbucks and sneaking a smoke, which by the way is hilarious. So the leader or figure head of these people would have to be the guy that plays Ben Franklin. You’ve seen him. Watch any Philly sports event and your nearly garunteed to see a cliché shot of him as they come back from commercial.

 

So what kind of love life could a guy that has dedicated his life to being someone else possibly have? This is where I think it gets romantic. Well he finds it with Betsy Ross. A woman who has set the same course for her life. Two people that love history so much that they rewrite it. Admit it, it’s a little poetic. I imagine that the life of a historical impersonator can be lonely. It takes dedication. And here two people find love wrapped inside the one thing they love the most. Say what you will but I think it’s beautiful and a true Philadelphia story. Here’s the video evidence.  

We did a little interview with Duff McKagan from Guns N’ Roses and Velvet Revolver this week. Our friends at AntiMusic.com were kind enough to mention it here. Then it kind of took off, here, here, and oh yeah….here. Ironically, our Steve Schirripa underwear conversation has not yet taken off. Here's hopin!
 

So I went to a special screening of WALL-E last night. That’s right three days before it hits theaters! I’ll take a second so you can console the jealously of your middle school child.

 

“How do you have such a hook up?” you may ask. Because I’m people who knows people. Connections! Not the connections that can woo girls, like concert tickets or celebrity meetings, but the kind that gets you into Disney movies early. Baller! This is quite fine with me because I have a girlfriend that is often stuck in adolescence. Ice Cream and Skee Ball still make her smile and that’s alright with me.

 

Now before you rush to judgment about WALL-E let me give you a little pep talk. It’s alright to like kids movies. I know there is a lot in your nature that makes that hard but its ok. Set down the macho act for a second and let yourself laugh at an animated robot. Because my friend, you WILL laugh.

 

In all honesty it’s the best movie I’ve seen so far this summer. If you can let the kid in you come out for an hour and a half then you will definitely be entertained. How could you not? It’s a robot in love. And robot love is special and hilarious. Truth.

 

In true Disney fashion they have worked in a nice little message. Between all the robot love and antics, the film examines how Corporate Overtaking and the Gluttony of America will one day lead to the destruction of our planet and mind. I know…heavy. But it works because it’s true. And if that’s too much to swallow for little Billy or your forever young girlfriend than the adorable robot antics is enough of a candy coating. See this movie!

 

Sidebar. When seeing movies of this nature you have to have a plan. Make sure you see it late. Like past little Billy’s bedtime late. It’s the only way to fully enjoy it. See you may not have been aware but if you buy your ticket for a showing before 5pm it comes with the kids movie bonus plan. Complete with chair kicking, screaming, wandering down the rows, and a minimum of one outburst or soda spill. Call me minimalistic but I could do without all of that. Enjoy and let me know what you think.

That’s when I realized I was in an Elderly Gay Bar! That’s how the story ends.

 

 I’ll let that settle in for a second. Got it? And we’re moving on. The way the story begins is this. The other day I was walking around the city with a friend and stopped for lunch at a little corner bar. I noticed the bartender was a little extra sassy, but who isn’t in Center City. It wasn’t until a couple older gentlemen walked in and the flirting got turned up to 11 that I became suspicious. The clincher was definitely when they asked if my friend and I were married. And that…wait for it…was when I realized I was in an Elderly Gay Bar. A homosexual Boca Raton if you will. This is awesome news. Why shouldn’t there be an Elderly Gay Bar? If we are going to segment everything else in society than we should all get a fair shake. I mean there are way too many bars that cater to the “cover your lack of personality with loud dance music” crowd. Let’s convert a couple of those into comfortably quiet spots with good Chicken Fingers. Your move Nutter.

 

The other thing that took me by surprise Friday was this FNMTV show on MTV. If you’re ever looking to prove to your doubting friends that you actually DO get seizures and have ADD then this is the show for you! I love music videos, but at the age of 25 I feel like I can handle the full dose. Thank you MTV for your preventative measures but, really I’m cool. To distract you from this point is the laser light spectacular that precedes each video. Wow. Even traffic lights scare me now. Thank you MTV for bringing back videos, you’re half way there. If you dream it you can achieve it!