6:01 – The studio looks a little different today and Danny’s not sure why. Metro cleaned. The weight of Danny’s boxing title belts destroyed the Rocky cardboard stand-up that was hanging out in the studio. Of the tree stand-ups in the studio, Rocky, a Star Wars storm trooper, and some chick in a bikini Metro is most attracted to the storm trooper. Shila wants a stand-up that represents her, maybe a Michael Jackson one. Danny took his daughter Isabella to South Street and discovered how much it’s changed and ended up at some cool shops in the area, like Infinite. Danny bought her some cool band shirts and the real reason they were there was to buy some new 10 gauge earrings for Isabella. Danny then got into a discussion with her about what makes people cool and interesting. It’s not the clothes and the earrings, it’s the person. To drive the point home Danny pierced his own ear on the spot. Blood can put an exclamation point on any conversation. She told him that she thought he was interesting without trendy cloths. Isabella is an interesting person because she knew Vlad the Impaler upon seeing him and where the term Joy Division really came from. Now Danny has a new hole in his ear to show for it.
6:20 – Gibbons is down at Tony Luke’s for another Live In It And Win report, but before that gets started Danny alerts Gibbons that he’ll be going to an amusement park with Isabella. She’s become a big fan of Gibbons and wants to go on some rides at Dorney Park before heading back to California. Tourrettes Joe is about to move from the back seat to the driver’s side when the next break comes. Michele’s been using the pillow she won yesterday. Michele hasn’t started her grand scheme of singing during the night to keep the other contestants up. Danny thinks they’re being too nice and is planning to crank up the discomfort meter. 6:38 – SPORTS: The Phillies announced late last night that they had placed lefthander Antonio Bastardo on the 15-day disabled list with a posterior shoulder strain, likely sidelining him until after the All-Star break. Bastardo suffered the injury against the Rays on June 25, when he allowed six runs on seven hits before leaving with two outs in the fourth inning.
The Philadelphia Eagles agreed to terms on a four-year deal with second-round draft choice LeSean McCoy on Monday. The running back from Pittsburgh, taken by Philadelphia with the 53rd overall selection, is the first second-round pick to sign, according to agent Drew Rosenhaus. Philadelphia has come to terms with seven of the eight members of its 2009 draft class. Only first-rounder Jeremy Maclin, a wide receiver from Missouri, has not agreed to a deal.
6:50 – Danny’s finished with boxing and bleeding for the headlines. Wrestling might be in the cards thought. Dan calls in with an idea that Danny bleeds for Philly by giving blood and organizing a blood drive. Danny’s a fan of the idea, but his blood might not be wanted by the Red Cross. He’s had a tattoo in the past six months. If the rules are different he’d jump at it. The abuse Danny put his body through is not an issue; his liver loves him and is working fine.
7:08 – News with Shila:
Police are searching for several suspects in connection to a deadly double shooting in an upscale Northern Liberties apartment building Saturday evening. Investigators released surveillance footage of the suspects three gunman entering the building and a fourth who posed as a lookout moments before the murder. One of the victims, 34-year-old Rian Thal, worked as a marketing manager for night clubs in the city. Thal and a male, identified as Tim Gilmore of Ohio, were both shot multiple times during the incident. Police said they found approximately $100,000 in cash and a large amount of cocaine in Thal's apartment. The suspects did not take any of the cash or drugs found in the apartment. Investigators said they believe the double murder was drug-related. Danny’s never taken Special K, but has heard about K-Holes that can put people into a drug induced coma for hours. Danny made more money selling drugs than pouring drinks when he worked as a bat tender. Party promoter is a nice cover for drug sales.
In less than 24 hours, three crashes involving a driver allegedly under the influence left five Philadelphia Police officers injured. Police said two officers were hurt when an SUV collided into their cruiser in Hunting Park just after 11 p.m. Sunday night. Neither officer was seriously injured in the crash. Hours earlier, two officers with the 24th District were injured after they were struck during a traffic stop. Officer George Higginson, 25, and Officer Richard Hayes, 28, were searching a vehicle when it was struck by a Honda Ridgeline at about 1:30 a.m. Officer Higginson was treated for lacerations to his face. Officer Hayes was taken to the Hospital where he remains in critical condition. And finally, a fifth officer was slightly injured following an incident involving an alleged drunk driver early Sunday morning. The officer suffered minor injuries following the accident in the 2800 block of N. Taylor Street. The driver was taken into custody and is facing numerous charges.
Bernard Madoff, the financier who defrauded investors out of billions of dollars, was sentenced to 150 years in prison yesterday. It was the maximum sentence for the 71-year-old. The sentencing was met with applause in the packed Manhattan courtroom. Before the judge's decision was announced, Madoff apologized to his victims - some of whom got to speak at the sentencing. He said that he will live "with this pain, this torment, for the rest of my life." Why 150 years instead of a life sentence? Satisfaction of the victims and going by the letter of the law.
His wife, Ruth Madoff, also expressed her shame yesterday, speaking out for the first time since her husband was arrested for fraud last year. She said she was "embarrassed and ashamed" at her husband's actions and feels "betrayed and confused."
Bill calls to tell Danny about K-Holes. After turning the Special K into a powder, cooked in a microwave, the drug will lock a person in position for hours at a time. 7:31 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Mike was put on probation for a Class B assault and was busted again for possession of alcohol. He’s under-21 and was intoxicated when he was popped for the assault charge. What got Danny in trouble for his trannie-punching incident wasn’t assault, but reckless endangerment for leading the police on a high speed chase through a school zone. It’s probably not worth putting Mike in jail for the additional charge, but he’ll probably get more probation and some community service.
George’s been separate from his baby’s mother for two years after a relapse. He’s mostly clean now, has a solid job, and she wants to move back in after seeing other guys. Danny would never be able to get over it, but Gretchen was able to get over his cheating for years. If George lets her move in, he should let the past stay in the past and move on with her. He’s got no right to bitch at her for seeing other guys when he was a junkie.
7:51 – Jordan Chandler, the man who accused Michael Jackson of molestation years ago is about 30 years-old now. His family settled for $22 million and didn’t press charges. Danny would take money, but he’d make sure that the predator did time. The kid went from allegedly being molested to being sold. Jordan is now allegedly admitting he lied and Jackson didn’t touch him. Jackson was nutty, but the molestation charges put him over the top and made him full-fledged insane. It’s the Chandler’s father that Danny has a big issue with. Mark calls to point out that the Los Angeles DA worked hard to corner Jackson but was never successful and made his life hell in the process. It’s not over ‘til the fat lady sings, and that fat lady is Liza Minnelli.
8:02 – Danny asks Michele, John, and Joe the trivia question to win phone privileges in the cell phone-free Live In It And Win Mustang. There’s no winner and no phone. Pay attention next time!
8:38 – Danny has slowly moved down the latest Most Likely To Die list. Ed McMahon was 30th, Danny is 63rd, and Michael Jackson was 89th. One of the first conversations Danny had with his fiancée Amy was about the five people they’d invite to a dinner party, living or dead. First on Danny’s list is Christ, he might be able to make dinner too. Second is Hitler, to find out how one person could do such terrible things. Shila would put Michael Jackson on the list, Oprah, Ghandi, and either Hitler or Osam bin Laden. Danny’s not impressed with Shila’s choice of Oprah because there’s no big secret in her life that Danny wants to uncover. Metro would take Obama, Bob Dylan, and the Arby’s guy because he’d bring food.
8:50 – Justin would take Jesus, JFK, Marilyn Monroe, Tupac, and Danny. Chris would take Jesus and Judas for some great uncomfortable moments. Tom would take Babe Ruth, Vai Sikkahema, Ty Cobb, George Washington, and Martha Stewart. John Lennon and Jimi Hendrix make Mike’s list. Danny didn’t like that Lennon made Amy’s list, but relented after her points for inclusion. Hendrix isn’t much of a revolutionary though. Lisa would invite Aristotle, Ben Franklin, Neil Young, Bob Dylan, and Einstein. What would Dylan and Einstein talk about?
9:02 – Gibbons checks in with another Live In It And Win report from Tony Luke’s. Joe has been missing work to win the Mustang and his bosses have been cheering him on. Michele usually sleeps when she’s in the back seat, so if it’s early or late and she’s in the front seats she talks to the 94WYSP promotions department. Michele is bothered by the bugs in the car that have started living there because of the food in the car. The bugs won’t drive her away though.
9:11 – Viewer Mail!
Ron writes in to say thank Danny for treating the death of Michael Jackson with respect. Other radio shows were full of bad jokes. Danny isn’t fond of radio DJ’s because many of them have awful senses of humor and a desire to get fat.
Sean writes to say that he wanted to hear what Isabella had to say when she was on the show and Danny was talking over her. Isabella does talk, but he’s not the chatter box that Danny is and he didn’t want her to have any awkward moments of silence on the air.
Don loves Danny’s selfish streak and Shila’s laugh. He thinks that Danny isn’t a crappy person, but doesn’t like Danny glorifiess being a bad person. Danny doesn’t glorify it, he just doesn’t run from the truth. He had some rough times that he wouldn’t wish on anyone and tells stories as cautionary tales.
9:54 – Spike is about to take over for the day, he’s live from Tony Luke’s in South Philly for Live In It And Win. Tension is mounting between Joe and Michele because he’s working hard and driving her out of the car.
9:59 - Danny’s Final Thought: You have got to avoid being average like it was the plague. If you want to be remembered you have to be great.
6:01 – Danny, Shila, and Metro are live from Tony Luke’s for Live In It And Win. More and more people in Danny’s life are dying. Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, and Billy Mays have all died recently. Worked or went to school with all of them. Billy Mays pitched a show idea to Danny’s television production company. They passed on the idea. A yearbook from Danny’s senior year of high school is on eBay. Christian Brando was also in the same class as Danny and Michael. Danny hadn’t seen Christian in a long time, but got a call from him just before his death. After the bizarre rambling message that Christian left Danny never called back. A few days later Christian was dead. Mays’ death took Danny by surprise though. With all this death around him, Danny’s decided to live. Drink, smoke, ride his motorcycle at high speeds. It could be possible that Danny can’t be killed. Danny once put a gun in his psychiatrist’s hand and asked the doctor to prove him wrong. Obviously the doc didn’t pull the trigger. We’re down to three in Live In It And Win. Airen dropped out Saturday night. Danny was a fan of her perkiness, but the good news is she’ll be clean and smellin’ good the next time he sees her.
6:27 – Danny talks to John, Joe, and Michele, the remaining Live In It And Win contestants. Airen dropped out Saturday night, but Joe says that she made it a point to bring in as much trash to the car as possible to annoy everyone one else. He’s determined and has a great support group who cheer him on. Joe barks sometimes because of his tourrettes. Danny does point out to John that he’s been sexless for over a week. Joe says that he’s glad that the excess trash is gone. Does he mean Airen??? Danny wakes up Michele to let all three of them know that he’s offering up a wrap-around neck pillow if they get a trivia question about the show correct. They just have to pay attention to the next 30 minutes of the program. 6:40 – SPORTS:
The Philadelphia Flyers have acquired star defenseman Chris Pronger in exchange for forward Joffrey Lupul and draft picks in a major blockbuster.
Chase Utley hit a two-run triple, Jamie Moyer won back-to-back starts for the first time in more than two months and the Philadelphia Phillies held on to beat the Toronto Blue Jays 5-4 on Sunday afternoon.
Having served his 50-game suspension from Major League Baseball, Phillies relief pitcher J.C. Romero may have to deal with a more serious legal problem. Romero was involved in an altercation with a Tampa Bay Rays fan after Thursday night's game at Tropicana Field, the Phillies and Rays confirmed Saturday. The fan lodged a criminal complaint of battery with police in St. Petersburg, Fla., and has retained a lawyer, according to a report in the St. Petersburg Times.
6:53 – Rich and Michael from Champman C&C Ford have dropped by the live broadcast and show Danny some love. They were one of the first sponsors of the show and have donated the Live In It And Win Mustang for the contest. Chapman is all about affordability and selection. Danny drove a Flex that he loved and moved on to a sweet Chapman Lincoln.
7:08 – News with Shila:
To Philadelphia police officers from the 24th District were injured when they were struck by a speeding car while making a routine traffic stop in the city's Bridesburg section early Sunday morning. The accident happened around 1:30 a.m. as officers Richard Hayes, 28, and George Higginson, 25, pulled over a red vehicle on suspicion of Driving under the Influence. While the officers were conducting their investigation a black truck slammed into them and the parked car and Officer Hayes got sent one flying through the air and into the street. He suffered facial injuries and a severe head injury. He was rushed to the Hospital, where he is now listed as critical as he remains in a medically induced coma. The other officer had several lacerations but is in stable condition. Police have the drivers of both vehicles in custody. Hayes' uncle, Robert Hayes, was killed in the line of duty working as a Philadelphia Police officer in 1993. Jackson was only 90 lbs., how much can there be to cut up? Having a second autopsy will allow the family to dispute the L.A. County coroner’s report, which could indicate drug abuse.
In a press conference Friday, Los Angeles County Coroner's spokesperson said that an autopsy conducted on singer Michael Jackson showed no sign of "trauma or foul play," but "the cause of death has been deferred, which means that the medical examiner has ordered additional testing." Results of toxicology tests are not expected for another four to six weeks. Jackson's body was returned to his family Friday night, and that the Jackson family wants a second independent autopsy because of so many unanswered questions. People reports that Michael Jackson's family had been worried about his dependency on drugs since 2006. Things were so bad that they recently attempted an intervention in Las Vegas, but were unable to get him to seek help. Janet was on the phone, but Randy, Jackie and Rebbie were there in person. Michael got pi**ed off. He said he wasn't on drugs. But they didn't believe him." Sources say that dad Joe Jackson wanted to get Michael into a California rehab because he believed his son was "addicted" to morphine and prescription drugs. Sources say Jackson would get his fix from one of his employees. An insider said that in addition to alcohol, Michael took, "straight morphine, Demerol and opiates like Oxycontin. He also takes Valium and Xanax." Why couldn’t some of the more famous Jacksons speak out? That might have made a difference.
TV pitchman Billy Mays – known for his beard, blue shirt and khakis and high-energy product endorsements - was found dead in his Tampa, Florida home Sunday. Mays, who famously endoursed products like Orange Glo and OxiClean, was 50 years old. He was found unresponsive by his wife Sunday morning. Mays’ wife, Deborah Mays, told investigators that her husband said he wasn’t feeling well before he went to bed Saturday night. On Saturday afternoon, Mays was on a U.S. Airways flight that made a rough landing. Tampa Bay's Fox television affiliate interviewed Mays after the incident and he said, "All of a sudden as we hit you know it was just the hardest hit, all the things from the ceiling started dropping. It hit me on the head, but I got a hard head." However, police spokeswoman said linking Mays' death to the rough landing would "purely be speculation." Mays was most recently seen on the Discovery Channel show Pitchmen.
The 40-year-old in Maine tried to run down his wife with a dump truck, but missed and crashed into some trees. He and his wife had been drinking at a friend's house on Wednesday and the wife told police that they had started to argue. She left the house with her dog and the man boarded his dump truck and drove toward her. Then, the man went off the road and crashed. He fled on foot, but police were able to find him at another house, where they arrested him for domestic violence and reckless conduct with a dangerous weapon.
Recently, 64-year-old Michael Petrina of Arlington, Virginia just outside of DC, won the AARP National Spelling Bee . . . 51 years after he LOST the Scripps National Spelling Bee as a kid. Michael's winning word was "woad" . . . which is a type of plant that produces a blue dye. He was awarded $500, a trophy and a dictionary kit. Just $500? He’ll probably forget he won it by the end of the day. 7:33 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Colleen ‘s been writing back and forth with a guy from Ireland for a few months and wants to know if he’s interested. She’s paying for her ticket to Ireland to visit him. She’s not sure where she’s going to stay, but is certain that she want to sleep with him. Danny suggests that she asks him to pay for some of the ticket, but be aware that he didn’t pony up the cash for the visit. If he steps up and helps out with the ticket cost then he’s not that into her.
Sandy’s wants to save cash on a wedding ceremony by having a beach wedding, but her fiancé wants to have a big wedding and reception. He’s gay! No straight man wants to have a big wedding. Any man that says ‘no’ to a smaller wedding that will save money is in the closet. If he doesn’t want to save money now, and do a small thing just because Sandy wants him to he needs to cave. If he doesn’t then he’s not the right guy.
7:49 – Airen, the Live In It And dropped out Saturday night is on the show now. Shila commends her for the 6 days she was in the car, but Danny does not. She brought in some yogurt and other food into the car and now the Mustang stinks. Airen was annoyed by Joe’s tourrettes, but she doesn’t have to put up with it now. Danny is wowed at Airen and her mom, they’re both hot. Some of the remaining contestants are NOT fans of Airen. Joe thinks she’s a bitch, and someone in the front seat who will remain nameless doesn’t like Airen or her family. Michele likes Airen, but doesn’t care for her mom. Airen’s mom has offended Michele with her immaturity. Danny asks the trivia question for the wrap-around neck pillow, which Airen will read. ‘What word did the AARP Spelling Bee winner spell?’ Michele gets it right, woad. She gets the pillow! Joe thinks that John might be the next one to leave the car, he jut wants an automobile. It doesn’t have to be the Mustang. Danny offers to buy a beat up car for $300 to possibly give to John to lure him out of the Mustang. Danny is informed that if anyone on the show buys a car to lure a contestant out of the Mustang is showing favoritism. Boo!
8:09 – Entertainment News:
Michael Jackson collaborated with many artists over the years including Paul McCartney, Mick Jagger and Slash, but it's just been revealed that he recorded two tracks with another icon that have never been released. Queen guitarist Brian May posted on his blog over the weekend that Freddie Mercury and Michael did a couple of tunes together at Michael's house but those tracks remain unheard by the public. Danny thinks that all sorts of Michael Jackson tracks will be brought out of the vault; from Motown days to stuff he recorded leading up to the new tour. It’s time to cash in!
Menwhile, Slash has performed live with Michael Jackson, and played on some of his songs. He told a newspaper that he was invited to play at Michael's 40th birthday concert at New York's Madison Square Garden in 1999. It was shortly after Slash had a defibrillator installed to keep his heart beating. He gets on stage and since the excitement boosted his heart rate, Slash says he was getting shocked about four times during every song. He finished the show, but had no idea what was going on until afterwards. Slash also remembered Michael calling and asking him to play on his next album, "Dangerous." He did the solos on "Black & White" and "Give In To Me."
Meanwhile, Michael Jackson's former wife Lisa Marie Presley took to her MySpace blog Friday to reveal that she and the pop star once discussed his death. "Years ago Michael and I were having a deep conversation about life in general". "He stared at me very intensely and he stated with an almost calm certainty, 'I am afraid that I am going to end up like [Elvis Presley], the way he did.' I promptly tried to deter him from the idea, at which point he just shrugged his shoulders and nodded almost matter of fact as if to let me know, he knew what he knew and that was kind of that."
Michael Jackson's sudden death Thursday forced Universal Pictures to edit their upcoming Sacha Baron Cohen movie Bruno just hours before its LA premiere. A scene in which an unsuspecting LaToya Jackson is interviewed by the gay Austrian fashionista was cut because she's asked about her brother. It also features a joke about the King of Pop's high-pitched voice and white glove. Bruno hits theaters July 10th and director Larry Charles says they plan to, "reassess before the release whether to keep it in." Danny's all for the scene being left in. If it's legal, do it!
Alien robots have transformed into box-office superstars with $200 million in domestic ticket sales in just five days."Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" took in $112 million in the sequel's first weekend and $201.2 million since opening Wednesday. The "The Proposal," came in 2nd with $18.5 million. Danny loved Sandra until she did Miss Congeniality 2.
Former Playboy Playmate Kendra Wilkinson and NFL player Hank Baskett got hitched Saturday at Kendra's former home, the Playboy Mansion. Among the 500 guests was ex-beau Hugh Hefner. Kendra, who stars in her own self-titled E! show, wore a white gown, as well as $100,000 worth of platinum jewelry. The groom and groomsmen wore white as well, while the bridesmaids were dressed in lavender. Danny’s amazed that she wore white.
Eddie Van Halen got married over the weekend. Eddie's brother and Van Halen drummer Alex, who is also an ordained minister, performed the ceremony. The groom wore flip-flops. There were about 100 guests including Eddie's ex-wife and mother of their son Wolfgang, Valerie Bertinelli. At the reception, the bar was non-alcoholic. Danny’s rules would prevent him from allowing his ex-wife and her boyfriend at his wedding.
8:34 – The Art of Manliness: The Road Trip
Metro’s idea of the three necessities for a good road trip: The mix tape, the snacks, and timing out breaks. Wrong on all counts according to Danny! Just bring music, no need for mix tapes. Road trip is a fight for shotgun, there’s no time for snacks. Stop for food and use that opportunity to get shotgun. There’s no need to schedule breaks. First guy that asks to stop has to buy drinks for the group or the next tank of gas. Porn might be a new wrinkle in the road trip because of television screens in the back seat. Just don’t drive through Alabama while watching it. Actually, avoid Alabama at all costs.
8:47 – Danny and Shila talk to the Live In It And Win contestants. John is feeling good and goes through the food that Airen brought into the car under the suggestion from her mother. Tuna fish, week-old yogurt and more stinky junk. Somehow, through all of this, John has a girlfriend that’s sticking by him. What he misses most is being able to eat on his own schedule. Michele misses being able to have a phone call that lasts more than 10 minutes. She has people rooting for her, but they don’t have much o a chance to come out to Tony Luke’s to show it. Michele is fond of Joe and John, they all want the Mustang, but they’d be pleased when one of them wins. John isn’t as cordial, but he NEEDS a car. Michele has a nice Mazda, but she wants the Mustang. Would she offer her Mazda to get John to drop out? They talked about it, but there are taxes that have to be dealt with. Joe’s still missing work and burning through his vacation days quite quickly. He hasn’t been fired…yet.
9:07 – Danny, Shila, and Metro had a good time at Friday’s Neighborhood Hotties: Bucks County finals. The first girl up is Alyssa, who would be a carrot if she could be a vegetable. Why? It’s long and hard! Stephanie is up next, she’s never been with another girl because she loves boy parts. Tiffany is fourth. Jess is fifth. Kelly is the final woman, who has gotten so drunk she made out with another girl. It’s time for the talent show! Alyssa’s talent is body painting, nice! She pants her boobs and paint’s Danny’s chest too. Stephanie’s skill is flashing the crowd. Danny’s ass gets to see the crowd too. Tiffany does the splits. Jess does drunken cartwheels. Interesting. After the bikini competition Tiffany wins by audience applause.
9:31 – Tony Luke Jr. is on the show now. Danny is pleasantly surprised how good Tony’s new frozen food cheesesteak is. Tony is quite the local legend in the city. He loves Phillly. Tony wanted to be an actor but had to leave Los Angeles because there are a big name actor that didn’t like him too much. He worked in the music business, then about 12 years later got back into acting, landed a role in ‘Invincible’ and is now taking the world by storm. Tony’s story sounds a lot like Danny’s. Tony was surprised that more people haven’t dropped out of Live In It And Win and wants Danny to ratchet up the torture level.
9:45 – News with Shila:
A Newtown Square mother of 3, Donna Kay Busch and her attorneys must make an important decision by Aug. 31 whether to take her case before the U.S. Supreme Court. Her case tackles issues of free speech and separation of church and state. In a 2005 lawsuit against the Marple Newtown School District, Busch contends that her and her son's right to religious expression was violated when she was not allowed to read from the Bible during an exercise in kindergarten. During All About Me Week, students made presentations about themselves. One option was to have a parent read from the child's favorite book. Wesley chose the Bible. When his mother tried to read it, Principal Thomas Cook asked her not to, citing separation of church and state. Courts have ruled twice against Busch. Theoretically Danny is a Catholic, but would become militant if the Bible was his kid’s favorite book and wasn’t allowed to read from it in class.
The Supreme Court ruled recently that school officials who strip searched a then-13-year-old girl violated the girl's constitutional rights. It was a big win for Arizona teen Savana Redding who was summoned out of her classroom and asked to strip down to her underwear after school officials suspected she was carrying prescription strength ibuprofen. The 8-1 court decision could redefine student privacy rights and guidelines for school officials as they seek out contraband, like drugs, weapons or alcohol. The school officials who carried out the search are protected from personal liability in the case.
A Colorado meat company is expanding a recall of beef due to possible contamination by E.coli bacteria after an investigation found 18 illnesses may be linked to the meat. The Colorado-based JBS-Swift Beef Co is voluntarily expanding its June 24 recall to include about 380,000 lbs of assorted beef products, for a total recall of about 421,000 lbs of beef. The affected beef was produced on April 21 and was distributed nationally and internationally. Consumers with any questions can call: 1-800-685-6328.
Guys if you are worried about your junk being too small, there are men in other countries that have you beat. A survey came out ranking countries and penis size. 5.1 inches long is what the average American guy's junk is. So let’s check out the average penis sizes from other countries around the world:
--Korea: 3.8 inches
--India: 4 inches
--Venezuela: 5 inches
--Canada: 5 inches
--Japan: 5.1 inches
--Spain: 5.3 inches
--Colombia: 5.5 inches
--Saudi Arabia: 5.5 inches
--Germany: 5.7 inches
--Brazil: 5.7 inches
--Mexico: 5.8 inches
--Italy: 5.9 inches
--France: 6.3 inches
--South Africa: 6.9 inches
9:53 – Spike is about to take over. He’s become familiar with the Tony Luke’s staff after all the Live In It And Win broadcasts. Spike thought that Airen would win out of spite, but was tipped off that she’d be leaving. Danny’s a big fan of her ass, that’ll get someone to buy her a Mustang.
9:59 – Danny’s Final Thought: Either the next time we read a list you should take it with a grain of salt, or I’ve been right the whole time and I’m immortal.
6:01 – Yesterday was an odd day for Danny. Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson passed away. Farrah’s first speaking role on television was on an episode of The Partridge Family and Danny went to high school with Michael. They’ve known each other since the age of five, so Danny’s phone has been ringing non-stop with people wanting to talk about Michael. Shila was in tears of Michael Jackson last night. Danny’s glad that he wasn’t Michael because he was hounded to death. Danny thinks it’s half-murder, half-suicide. It wasn’t at the hands of another person, but from the constant pressure and panic brought on by the public. Danny never got on the child molestation band wagon because it was illogical to him. However Michael did lose control of his world and walked around with target on his back. He learned a valuable lesson from Michael when his daughter Isabella had a slumber party where Danny was the only parent in the house. So rather than risk incorrect accusations, he brought another adult to the house. Shila’s sad that Michael didn’t go out on top; she always looked up to him. Danny does cite Michael as the greatest entertainer of his generation.
6:24 – Danny checks in with Gibbons down at Tony Luke’s for the first Live In It And Win report of the day. Michele is the first one to wake up after Gibbons hit the alarm on the bull horn. Michele was doing well until she spilled a milkshake in the car last night. Danny tells them that he’ll ask them a question about the show and the person with the correct answer wins a massage.
6:34 – At this moment Fox 29 is playing back an interview Danny did about Michael Jackson. He spoke about his daughter going to Neverland, his admiration of Michael as an artist, and his lifelong relationship with Michael.
6:47 – There were a few people that Danny met early in his career which he knew had superstar talent like Jodie Foster and Michael Jackson. Jackson should have changed the way he operated after the first time he was accused of child molestation. Danny didn’t play little league, but his childhood included meeting President Nixon. That’s fine by him. He never felt like he was robbed of his childhood, he was just given a different one. A Boston DJ calls Danny to ask him about growing up with Michael. The biggest impact Michael had on Danny? He was homeless and on his way to buy drugs when Michael pulled up in a limo and Michael stopped to say ‘Hi.’ At that moment Danny felt ashamed and thought if he played his cards right he could have been the one in the limo and Michael thought about the exact opposite thing. Danny didn’t turn his life around that moment, it took about 10 years. Michael never spoke much in High School. When Danny asked him why Michael told him that he was in constant remembrance of God. Danny thought this was foolish and should’ve been chasing girls too.
7:03 – Danny checks in with Gibbons down at Tony Luke’s for another Live In It And Win report. Danny’s asks the contestants to name the radio station frequency of the Boston station that called him for an interview. John got it right, 98.5 in Boston. He gets a massage during the next break. He’s not smelling too good these days though.
7:13 – News with Shila: Michael Jackson, the iconic “King of Pop,” died yesterday at the age of 50 after suffering an apparent cardiac arrest. Jackson passed away at UCLA Medical Center after collapsing at his rented home in Holmby Hills, California. Paramedics tried unsuccessfully to resuscitate him. His exact cause of death is still unknown. An autopsy is to take place today. Jackson had been preparing for a comeback tour set to begin on July 13th. He was scheduled for 50 shows at a London arena. To prepare for the intense performances, he was training with Lou Ferrigno, the star of the TV show The Incredible Hulk. But some close to him expressed worry that he wasn't in the right physical shape to perform. Jackson is survived by his three children, Michael Joseph Jackson, Jr., Paris Michael Katherine Jackson and Prince "Blanket" Michael Jackson II.
Police have made an arrest in the case of a Berks County woman set on fire. At the crime scene this morning, firefighters and police say they found the victim, Maria Serrano, age 49, had been beaten, stabbed, and then torched, allegedly by her estranged boyfriend. The fire spread to the house while the woman was flown to the hospital. Before Serrano was taken away to the Lehigh Valley Hospital's burn center, she told police it was her recently paroled boyfriend, Donald Williams, Jr., age 32 who had tried to kill her; he was arrested within a half-hour at the halfway house to which he has been assigned. Williams has been charged with attempted murder and arson. Serrano is expected to survive her wounds and injuries.
A two-year-old Chinese boy allegedly smokes a pack of cigarettes a day. The boy's father said he taught his son to smoke at 18 months because he believed the habit would alleviate pain caused by a hernia. Tong Liangliang now throws a tantrum if he doesn't get his smoking fix. According to sources, "The father wasn’t aware of how serious the toddler’s habit became until the child began to increase the number of cigarettes he smoked per day, "The body is incredible at heeling itself. Danny just had a physical and his liver is 100%. At one point it was shutting down with jaundice, but he’s feeling great now. If the kid quits now he should be fine, but if the kid keeps it up he’ll be in trouble.
Last February, police in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, arrested a 36-year-old prostitute named Lahoma Smith after they caught her having sex with an unidentified guy. But get this. When the guy propositioned Lahoma, he didn't have any cash on him. So, instead, he traded Lahoma a $30 box of Frito-Lay chips which he had in the backseat of his car. Lahoma was found guilty of prostitution last week and she was fined (--which is the equivalent of 38 boxes of chips). Lahoma was free-to-lay! 7:31 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
John is talking to two different girls and doesn’t know which one to date. Girls play games when they start dating to hide their bad habits and true personality. The other girls wants to be with him non-stop. Danny would take the girl that wants to smother. She’s honest and true, but have fun with both of them and enjoy yourself.
Arlene’s husband of 38 years is cheating on her and she doesn’t know if she wants to stay around. Sex with a man that’s cheating is heartbreaking to a woman because they don’t think about the sex, they think about the cheating. Arlene’s husband is too old to be chasing around. The desire for the younger girl is a midlife crisis. He made a bad choice and is working to get Arlene back. Arlene needs to decide if she can get over it today. If the answer is yes then start working at it, if not then run far and fast.
7:49 – Danny gets another call for a Michael Jackson interview from a station in Boston. So far Danny’s been on one television show and 5 other radio stations talking about Michael. Danny thinks he’ll end up at an oldies radio station playing ‘I Think I Love You’ and not getting any ASCAP checks for it. David Cassidy has bad hair, but a great business mind.
8:01 – It's time for another Live In It And Win report with Gibbons, live from Tony Luke's. Jenn the masseuse is ready to give John the rub down he won. She was hoping that John wasn’t the winner because it’s been two weeks since he showered, but she can handle the stink. John is enjoying Jenn’s hands, his back and shoulders are the spots he wants to get worked on. Joe tried to steel John’s massage, but he’s getting a rub down from a friend who’s there to cheer him on. It’s not a professional massage though.
8:12 – New with Shila: King of Pop Michael Jackson died yesterday from cardiac arrest. He was 50. TMZ reports that paramedics were called to his home at 12:21 PST and when they arrived he had no pulse and after 45 minutes of trying, they were unable to revive him. "It is believed he suffered cardiac arrest in his home. However, the cause of his death is unknown until results of the autopsy are known," said brother Jermaine. The Sun claimed he collapsed after being injected with the pain killer Demerol. Jackson began his career at age 11 as a member of the Jackson 5. As a solo artist he had 13 number one hits, and won 13 Grammy Awards. His 1982 album Thriller is the biggest selling album of all time, and his other albums, including 1979's Off the Wall, 1987's Bad, 1991's Dangerous and 1995's HIStory were among the world's best selling records. He is considered one of the most successful entertainers of the past century, with a lifetime sales tally estimated at 750 million records. Michael was never a large guy, he was always very slender. Demerol will put you on your ass if you take it orally, but getting Demerol shots means that you’re in bad condition.
His body was flown by helicopter from the hospital to the coroner's office late on Thursday. Brian Oxman, a spokesman for the Jackson family, told CNN on Thursday that the family had been concerned about his health and had tried in vain to take care of him for months. "Michael appeared at rehearsals a couple of times, he was very seriously trying to be able to do those rehearsals," Oxman said of Jackson's preparations for a series of 50 concerts that were scheduled to begin in London in July. "His use of medications had gotten in the way, his injuries which he had sustained performing, where he had broken a vertebrae and he had broken his leg from a fall on the stage, were getting in the way," Oxman told CNN. Authorities have scheduled an autopsy for Friday. But they cautioned that it could take weeks to determine a cause of death, which will likely have to wait for the return of toxicology tests. "For Michael to be taken away from us so suddenly at such a young age, I just don't have the words," said Quincy Jones, producer of Thriller. "He was the consummate entertainer and his contributions and legacy will be felt upon the world forever. I've lost my little brother today, and part of my soul has gone with him."
Former Charlie's Angels star Farrah Fawcett lost her battle with cancer at 9:28 am PST yesterday. She was 62. "She's gone. She now belongs to the ages," longtime boyfriend Ryan O'Neal told People. "She's now with her mother and sister and her God. I loved her with all my heart. I will miss her so very, very much. Ryan recently proposed to Farrah but never got to marry her. Her only son, 24-year-old Redmond O'Neal, is behind bars on drug-related charges. Farrah got her big break starring as one-third of an all-girls crime fighting trio in 1976's Charlie's Angels, but she's probably best known for her sexy swimsuit poster that hung on millions of teenage boys' walls, as well as her infamous feathered hairdo. In 2006 she was diagnosed with anal cancer, and recorded her struggle with the disease for a documentary, Farrah's Story, which aired on NBC May 15th. The network announced yesterday that they will be airing a follow-up at a future date. Danny had an intimate relationship with his Farrah Fawcett poster.
8:31 – Yesterday Danny paid a visit to East Coast Aquatics to stick his hand in a fish tank full of piranhas. He dropped his fiancee’s engagement ring in the tank with the plan to ease in and slowly grab the ring. It turns out there are some other hungry fish in the tank that love the taste of flesh. It’s a matter of when Danny gets bitten, not if. Danny gets the ring without getting bitten. Danny now sticks his hand in a tank with some sort of purple biting fish that’s taken a chunk out of one of the employee’s hands. She’s having no part of eating Danny’s fingers. Danny is the Fish Whisperer. It’s on to the electric eel. Danny feels that one. Up next is a fish that’s been sold and returned three times because of his bad attitude. He takes a nibble and tastes the hand of Bonaduce. Danny got Amy’s ring back without hurting any of the fish.
9:01 – It’s time for another shot at the Naked Weather Woman. Today’s guest is Sukie. She’s a good looking girl who’s skilled at baking with alcohol. Today’s Naked Weather Woman will have the title of Bartender added to it today because it’s Friday. She takes off the shirt. She’s 5’3”, thin and carrying around some full D cups. She’s got a pierced bellybutton she got while bonding with a stranger while on vacation with her family. She’s done the weather and made drinks for the show. She makes a strong drink. She brought in rum cake for the show too. Danny will be able to have his cake and eat it too.
9:25 – Jimmy calls to asks about listeners being able to be in the studio when the Naked Weather Women come in. Suki’s cool with that, she just wants to pick who gets to come in.
9:31 – News with Shila: Michael Jackson, the iconic “King of Pop,” died yesterday at the age of 50 after suffering an apparent cardiac arrest. Jackson passed away at UCLA Medical Center after collapsing at his rented home in Holmby Hills, California. Paramedics tried unsuccessfully to resuscitate him. . His exact cause of death is still unknown. An autopsy is to take place today. Jackson had been preparing for a comeback tour set to begin on July 13th. He was scheduled for 50 shows at a London arena. To prepare for the intense performances, he was training with Lou Ferrigno, the star of the TV show The Incredible Hulk. But some close to him expressed worry that he wasn't in the right physical shape to perform. Jackson is survived by his three children, Michael Joseph Jackson, Jr., Paris Michael Katherine Jackson and Prince "Blanket" Michael Jackson II. When plastic surgery turns into an addiction that’s an issue. Danny was amazed that an actor he went to rehab with was popping over 50 pain pills a day. Pills are worse for the liver than I.V. drug injections. The first time Danny didn’t want to trade lives with anyone super-rich and super-famous was when Michael Jackson was on trial.
One person was injured after a car lost control and eventually slammed through the side of a Montgomery County post office. The incident happened at about 3 p.m. Thursday afternoon at the Glenside Post Office. According to investigators, the car jumped a curb, hit and tree and eventually crashed through the side of the post office building. The exact cause of the accident remains under police investigation.
Last weekend, 17-year-old Maria Barbu of Brasov, Romania, was twittering . . . while taking a bath. When the battery ran out on her laptop . . . Maria decided to plug it into the wall outlet, so she could stay connected to Twitter. Now, it's unclear exactly what happened next, but Maria either dropped the computer into the bathtub . . . or was so wet that the water dripping off her caused the shock. But either way, Maria was electrocuted . . . and killed. That’s a bad twitter that doesn’t end with a sideways smiley face.
Brian calls to say that a younger girl wants to date him, but he’s not certain of her age. He doesn’t want to cross the legal line, but is interested in the girl. Danny thought that his fiancée Amy was in high school, but she was a math teacher, not a student. Danny made it a point to not mention age or make an issue of it. Don’t point out the differences. Treat the girl with respect and she’ll dig you for it.
9:54 – Spike is about to take over, live from Tony Lukes as we continue Live In It And Win. All four contestants are asleep, but truck drivers have been driving by all morning and honking their horns to wake them up. It makes Spike freak out, but the contestants aren’t budging. All four look like they’re deteriorating rapidly. Danny wants to throw a rat in the car to cohabitate in honor of Michael Jackson, who sang a song about a rodent, Ben. Maybe even withhold food so cannibalism sets in. Spike calls that as a clear breach of the rules and would result in disqualification.
10:02 – Danny’s Final Thought: Wake up in the morning and instead of hitting snooze wake up that second and enjoy everything you do. King of Pop or high school coach today could be your day.
6:01 – There’s a bowl of Bonaduce idiocy that we can pick from today. Danny walked home yesterday and forgot that he rode his motorcycle to work in the morning. It’s safe and sound, he checked in on it on the way to work today. Danny wanted to spend some time with his son Dante yesterday, but he didn’t want to give up the videogames. So he put Dante on Amy’s scooter and drove him around the city. After showing Dante the William Penn statue on top of City Hall at an angle that looks like Billy Penn is holding his wang Danny was scolded by a driver for driving Dante around the city on a scooter. Things got wordy and Danny told the guy that Dante is his son and he’ll kill him how he wants to. Danny pulled over ready to fight the guy after a war of words when Dante was the voice of reason.
6:35 – SPORTS: Matt Garza shut down Philadelphia's offense and ex-Phillies slugger Pat Burrell homered for the first time in over two months to help Tampa Bay beat his former team 7-1 on Wednesday night. The Cleveland Cavaliers are close to acquiring center Shaquille O'Neal in a trade that would pair him with MVP LeBron James. The Cavs and Phoenix Suns have reached an agreement in principle on the deal, which gives Cleveland two of the league's biggest superstars.
Jeff Jordan, son of former Bulls superstar Michael Jordan, has left the University of Illinois basketball team, saying he wanted to focus on his studies. "I loved playing for the Fighting Illini and appreciate the support I was given by my teammates, coaches and the great fans here," Jeff Jordan said in a statement. "But I have come to the point where I'm ready to focus on life after basketball." Danny’s not a basketball fan, but he loved it when Michael nailed two free throws with his eyes closed during a game. Danny would be reluctant to take it to the court if he Jordan’s kid and wasn’t as good as Michael.
6:49 – Danny was alarmed that Dante’s ear is pierced. Eight years-old is fine in Danny’s book, but he would like to have heard from him ex-wife about it though. Maybe Danny should bite off one of Dante’s fingers so he can have a sense of individuality. Body piercings are something that Danny considers body mutilation. Gretchen must have forgotten who she’s dealing with. Danny’s got to step the game up. Gretchen has given their 14 year-old daughter, Isabella, permission to get a tattoo. While Danny is dealing with this Gretchen is in Paris. She’s on tour with her married boyfriend’s band. Danny’s kids will go home as they were given to him, but he’s willing to stop alimony payments to Gretchen until his kids are as God made them, without piercings.
7:02 – Gibbons checks in with a Live In It And Win report from Tony Luke’s. Last night there was a shrimp delivery to the car, so it doesn’t smell so good in the Mustang right now. Tourrettes Joe sounds worn out. He’s been taking his meds though. Maybe Joe could buy John a car so he’d quit the contest and be one less opponent. That’s a good idea, but Joe would rather have someone else donate the car.
7:12 – News with Shila: Police in Phoenixville say a man fed up of children playing in his cul-de-sac blared a pornographic soundtrack to chase them off. Angry neighbors told police they could hear the sexually explicit audio a block and a half away. Police say 27 year old Michael Buck faces a felony obscenity charge and two misdemeanors for the May 31 stunt at his upscale Phoenixville home. Buck had filed one previous complaint about the neighborhood children. That’s the new millennium way of telling kids to get off your lawn. A listener wrote Danny with an idea about taking celebrity porn videos and having listeners guess the star after listening to the audio. Great idea, but it might not be in compliance with the rules of the FCC.
Four people were injured when a taxi cab apparently lost control outside of the Kimmel Center on Broad Street around 10 o’clock last night. It happened near the intersection of Broad and Spruce Streets. Eyewitness told police that the accident occurred when a cab travelling south on Broad Street "jumped the light" and struck a bicyclist and a pedestrian in the road. They were both taken to the hospital with severe injuries. The cab driver was also injured. He is in stable condition. It seems like every cab that Danny gets into has a driver who’s yapping away on his cell phone. So much for the passenger bill of rights.
South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford admitted Wednesday that he's been having an affair with a woman he secretly visited in Argentina. He also announced that he'll resign as head of the Republican Governors Association, but declined to say whether he'll leave office. Sanford, a father of four, disappeared without telling anyone last Thursday and his office claimed he had been hiking on the Appalachian Trial. However, Sanford revealed he was actually in Argentina visiting with the woman he said he's known for eight years and their relationship turned into something more a year ago. He also said his wife Jenny - who was not present at the news conference - has known about the affair for the last five months. Sanford broke down in tears during the conference. Danny is never crushed when politicians pound family values but eventually erupt into scandal. 7:33 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Chris’s brother is going through a hard time. His wife left him, she works as a stripper now, and he’s got two young kids. Chris’s brother isn’t interested in getting out of the house. The answer? Bring the party to him. Have some friends and bring some ladies. It will remind him of what life used to be like.
Tony’s worried about his brother who’s got a soft spot for pain pills. He’s been out of work for four years while poppin’ pills. Danny tells Tony to get his brother back to work while weening him off the pills while contacting the doctor about reducing the strength of the prescription. If little brother can kick the habit then big brother should be able to as well.
7:48 – Danny was yelled at by a driver after taking his eight year-old son Dante around the city on his scooter, which the other man thought was unsafe. Liv Tyler recently stepped in and scolded a mother yelling at her child. Danny would let it slide until it crossed the line and went from disciplining to berating. Telling a kid they’re stupid and worthless would be the breaking point for him. Shila and Metro would have trouble stepping in. Danny thinks it’s his responsibly to. Danny thinks that waiting for the confrontation to rise to the physical level is waiting too long.
8:01 – Danny checks in with Gibbons down at Tony Luke’s for another Live In It And Win report. All the contestants are sleeping at the moment. Danny thinks they’re getting too much sleep, he wants some insanity. Airen is wide awake now and talks about her union with Michele against the guys. Aien’s boyfriend comes down to support her and plans to sleep in the parking lot over the weekend. That’s sweet.
8:08 – Entertainment News:
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen just came out yesterday and it's already made a ton of money. Screenings held at midnight earned the film $16 million, the third biggest midnight box-office, behind Star Wars – Episode III Revenge of the Sith ($16.5 mil) and The Dark Knight ($18.5 mil). But just because the film makes a lot of money, doesn't mean it's good. The film is coming under fire from critics for what they believe are two robots that are racist stereotypes. In their review last week, Movieline said the two Autobots, named Skids and Mudflap, "are voiced in a way that clearly designates them to be 'black' robots. Also, Skids has a gold tooth and both cannot read." Director Michael Bay is dismissing the criticism saying, "Listen, you're going to have naysayers on anything. It's like is everything going to be melba toast? It takes all forms and shapes and sizes." Actor Reno Wilson, who is black, voices Mudflap, said that he never imagined viewers might consider the twins to be racial caricatures. When he took the role, he was told that the alien robots learned about human culture through the Web and that the twins were "wannabe gangster types." Metro liked the movie, there was plenty of Megan Fox, lots of robots, but there were lots of inconsistencies in the mythology of the film. Some nerd that called Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen the Gone With The Wind of action movies and counters Metro’s claims of inconsistencies with Transformers facts.
Johnny Depp has a new movie coming out called "Public Enemies." Well, he was having dinner at Gibsons steakhouse with some of his co-stars and the director Michael Mann, who were in Chicago last week for the premiere of their new gangster movie. Once the bill came around 2:30 AM -- totaling up to a reported $4,400 -- Depp made sure the man who waited on the group into the late hours was well compensated for his time. Mohammaed A. Sekhani reportedly received a $4,000 tip from the star. Depp and his friends ordered items including shrimp cocktails, Clams Casino, as well as a few expensive bottles of wine. Danny’s glad that he doesn’t drink wine. The good stuff is too expensive.
Speaking of Johnny Depp, he says he'd consider playing the Riddler in a "Batman" movie, if the part were offered to him. He says, quote, "If the opportunity came, I'd definitely juggle it. I always liked the Riddler [on the "Batman" TV show in the 1960s]. I always liked Frank Gorshin. Frank Gorshin was brilliant." Danny would love to see Depp as the Riddler. However he knows how Dillinger dies. He gets gunned down on the way to the movies with a woman in a red dress. Not much of a surprise there. 8:33 – Who Would Win In A Fight: Godzilla vs. Optimus Prime
Metro goes with Optimus prime because he has a bazooka and a sword for hands and Godzilla is just a lizard. Shila takes Godzilla because of his 400 ft. size, his radiation fire breath, he destroyed Tokyo, and he’s got a Blue Oyster Cult song. Danny takes Optimus Prime because he’s smarter and he can’t duck to avoid attacks.
Mike takes Optimus Prime because of his sword work. Tom goes with Godzilla because of sheer size. Lisa takes Optimus Prime. Sheila does too.
8:53 – John takes Optimus Prime although he’s a King Kong fan. Tony takes Godzilla and brings up the fact that he beat Mecha Godzilla. Rob takes Godzilla because he’s never lost a fight. Frank takes Godzilla. Harrison is another Godzilla vote because Optimus Prime is 1/10th the size of Godzilla. Andy takes Optimus Prime because he’s a good guy. Dan takes Optimus Prime because his tiny arms are useless. Roger takes Optimus Prime because of his weaponry and Ferris Bueller beat Godzilla. Chim Chim takes Optimus Prime because Ultraman whipped Godzilla’s ass every week. Optimus Prime takes the text and phone votes.
9:08 – Tomorrow Danny is going to stick his hand in a fish tank full of piranhas. He’s got a cut on his hand which is a cause of concern. They take large chunks of flesh the way they attack. Danny will take Amy’s engagement ring and drop it in the tank and then attempt to retrieve it. Whether Danny has a hand or not, he’s going to be at work bright and early tomorrow morning.
9:29 – News with Shila: Police are searching for a robbery suspect who struck three banks in Camden and Burlington Counties in less than an hour. Authorities said the female suspect started her spree at a Columbia Savings Bank. She handed a teller-in-training a demand note, but the teller refused to give her any money and then she fled. Less than 15 minutes later, the suspect entered The Bank on Route 73 in Berlin and handed over her demand note suspect fled with an undisclosed amount of money. Finally, she drove to a third bank gave a note and left with money. The Camden County Prosecutors office said, "The number of places she targeted in one day, within an hour, is unusual. It shows a certain level or risk that she was willing to take and a desperation to keep risking, keep hitting banks while police are alerted, police are out looking for somebody at that moment." Police said the suspect is believed to be an African-American female between the ages of 17 and 20 with black, curly hair and orange highlights.
A prominent Iowa high school football coach was shot and killed by a former player in the school's weight room Wednesday. According to police, 24-year-old Mark Becker shot 58-year-old High School coach Ed Thomas several times. He was arrested shortly after the shooting and charged with first-degree murder. Thomas was rushed to nearby hospital, where he died. Police said several students were in the room at the time of the shooting, though no one else was injured. They are still investigating a motive for the murder and looking into Becker's past. Thomas was honored as the NFL High School Coach of the Year in 2005 and four of his former players went on to the NFL. This kid probably had an experience that he couldn’t get past. Small town America isn’t as safe as it once was.
Police in Canada are searching for a man who ran naked through a Wendy's drive-thru and snatched a customer's French fries! An employee of the fast food joint was handing food to a customer waiting in her car when the man ran between them, and made off with the bag of food. The man, believed to be in his 20s, jumped into a waiting van and sped away from the scene. This is the most interesting thing that’s happened in Canada in three weeks. It takes amazing timing to grab the food at the right moment.
A North Dakota woman accused of breast-feeding her 6-week-old baby while drunk has pleaded guilty to child neglect. Stacey Anvarinia, 36, could face up to five years in prison when she's sentenced on the felony charge in August. Police officers who responded to a domestic disturbance call at Anvarinia's home on April 13 say they saw an intoxicated Anvarinia breast feeding. Health officials say alcohol consumed by breast-feeding mothers can be absorbed into an infant's system.
9:50 – Spike is live from Tony Luke’s to take over for the day. Spike got a noseful of John’s odor and almost threw up in his mouth. It’s the smell of 20 sweaty hockey players. He thinks the only reason for anyone to leave would be to have a mental breakdown. They’re all going to be smell not so sweet soon. Airen’s mother is running her blog while Airen’s trying to win the car. Danny wants more unrest at Tony Luke’s, sleep deprivation will make them crack much quicker. Spike wanted to annoy them initially, but now he doesn’t want to bother them. They’ve grown on him.
10:00 – Danny’s Final Thought: There are good guys like Spike and questionable people like me. I make more money! Who do you want to be?
6:01 – Danny partied hard last night to see Poison and Def Leppard. He had a great time, drinking generic vodka. Cheap Trick opened. He really liked Bret Michaels’ performance and the level of his humility on stage. Boning Bret is the prize on a cable television show and he’s on tour with Def Leppard. That’s the good life. Danny and his kids spent some time with Viv and Joe from Def Lep earlier in the evening. Isabella’s tight with the guys in the band. Danny and Isabella go back stage to hang with Bret and CC DeVille, who treated her like a princess. Danny did notice that one of Bret’s hands happened to be touching one of Amy’s ‘thunderboomers.’ After the first photo Amy asked for a second and slid into position so the he touched her there again. Rikki Rockett, the drummer, invited Danny on the tour bus. Danny was fired up to see a rock n’ roll spectacle on the bus, but was greeted by Rikki’s mom. Nice woman, but not much of a partier.
6:33 – SPORTS: But back on the road again, the Phillies instantly looked like contenders again, blowing away Tampa Bay, 10-1, in a World Series rematch at Tropicana Field. It ended a six-game losing streak.
Somewhere, Donovan McNabb, Tony Romo and dozens of other NFL players are smiling and Googling "Joanna Krupa." The supermodel talked mad trash to and about her teammate Terrell Owens in the first episode of "The Superstars." Seems she didn't appreciate losing the loser's race in tandem kayaking.
6:54 – There are people stealing Danny’s ideas and segments. First Glenn Beck won’t stop talking about the fact that he’s a recovering alcoholic. Danny is back to drinking. If he gets a contract extension he’s going to go back to drugs. There’s another DJ in town that’s started to do a Life Coach segment and another station is doing the naked weather girl idea.
7:01 – Gibbons checks in from Tony Luke’s with a Live In It And Win report. Tourrettes John is the only one awake, until Gibbons wakes them up with a bull horn. Airen is NOT happy. Is there tension between Joe and Airen? It’s not sexual. Joe and John are working against Airen while Michele is on her own. She didn’t bring tuna into the car to drive the guys off, but she did bring yogurt! It didn’t send the guys running though.
7:12 – News with Shila:
Rescue crews searched the Schuylkill River Tuesday evening after witnesses reported a female passenger was thrown into the water following a motorcycle crash. The driver of the motorcycle was rushed to the hospital after the accident on the Danne Hower Bridge in Norristown. Rescue crews in boats and divers in the water spent several hours searching the water for the woman. By late Tuesday night, the search for the female passenger was described as a recovery operation, meaning the woman was believed to have been killed. The male victim was taken to the Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania with several injuries. Danny’s caught some HUGE catfish in the Schuylkill. If you ever fall in the river you should shower immediately and if you have a cut get to a hospital immediately.
Nine days after being shot outside a bar, a Philadelphia Police officer was released from the Temple University hospital on Tuesday afternoon. Officer Ashley Hoggard, 26, was shot in the shoulder while responding to reports of gunfire outside a bar in North Philadelphia on June 14. "To be up and walking, is the most indescribable thing," said Officer Hoggard. Officer Hoggard is fortunate to be alive. The bullet that hit him under his left arm nicked one lung, causing both to collapse. He lost so much blood that Police Commissioner Charles Ramsey says he flat-lined. Officer Hoggard thanked his partner and said that he was the real hero.
Kimberly Vlaminck, who claimed that 56 stars were tattooed on her on her face while she slept when she really asked for three has admitted she was awake the whole time and lied about the entire incident because her father was furious. The Belgian blamed the Flemish-speaking tattoo artist for not being able to understand her French and English instructions and then she said she would sue the tattoo artist for the money she needed for laser surgery to have them removed. But the 18-year-old has finally confessed she did not fall asleep, and wanted all 56 stars. The tattoo artist even agreed to pay for half of the treatment to remove the tattoos.
According to the FDA, U.S. consumers should avoid two brands of pistachios tied to a salmonella-related recall because they may have been repackaged and sold in airports and hotels. The 2 brands to avoid are California Prime Produce and Orange County Orchards, which were repacked by Orca Distribution West Inc of Anaheim, California.
A Staten Island restaurant is relying on a group of Italian-born grandmothers for its menus. The women take turns cooking at 35-seat Enoteca Maria, using recipes from the different parts of Italy they come from. They decide what to cook based on whatever ingredients owner brings in. A crew of cooks and staff help them feed the daily crowds. 7:32 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Sue’s ex-husband passed away and demanded that her kids pass their inheritance over to their paternal grandfather to pay him back for the funeral costs. It turns out that she was the beneficiary of the will. They weren’t on good terms, but probably failed to change the will. It doesn’t matter what the father in-law thinks, it’s Sue’s now. Wills are contested constantly, so Danny would stiff the former father in-law. Why would a woman show up to her ex-husband’s funeral? To make sure he’s dead. If the old man was cheap enough to buy three mausoleum spots at once, then he’s probably too cheap to file a law suit.
A strip club in Texas that hired a 14-year-old as an exotic dancer says it was swindled and is suing the seventh-grader and her parents.
The girl allegedly exposed her breasts while working at Cheetah Club in Corpus Christi, a violation of state law. Alan Yaffe, the club's attorney, said the club didn't know the girl was a minor and disputed the alleged sequence of events that led the teenager to work there in the first place.
"She came (into the club) with 6-inch stiletto heels and a miniskirt and looked just like a model from a Miss America's contest," Yaffe said.
Did the club do enough to cover themselves or should they be shut down? Shila thinks that the bar is wrong and didn’t do due diligence when hiring the girl. Danny thinks the bar will lose too, but the girl should be held responsible for breaking the law too. 14 is far too young to dance, let alone fool a club manager. Ryan, a listener that just moved to town from Texas says that his Texas driver’s license isn’t very legit, even though it is. So maybe they’re easy to counterfeit.
8:02 – Danny checks in with Gibbons at Tony Luke’s with a Live In It And Win report again. As soon as John found out that he was going to be in the contest he stopped showering. So he’s been ripe for a while now. He’s caught a whiff of himself and gagged before. He’s also a smoker, but can’t smoke in the car. This could be his Achilles heel. Why do John and Joe dislike Airen? She’s a whiner.
8:11 – Entertainment News: Soundgarden will reunite. Brent Smith of Shinedown told a magazine that singer Chris Cornell is interested in rejoining the group which split up in 1997. Guitarist Kim Thayil, bass player Ben Shepherd and drummer Matt Cameron, who is now a member of Pearl Jam, all played together a recent gig in Seattle without Chris. Since Chris's solo career is dead in the water, a Soundgarden reunion may be perfect timing. Has time passed Soundgarden up? Though they were grunge pioneers this should be pretty cool.
TV legend Ed McMahon died yesterday morning at the age of 86. His publicist did not give a cause of death, saying only that McMahon had a "multitude of health problems the last few months." He had been hospitalized in February, reportedly with bone cancer. McMahon was best known for his work as sidekick to Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show from 1962 to 1992 and McMahon was also the host of Star Search. Ed lived by Danny’s code to live life to it’s fullest and not leave a penny in the bank.
FHM released their list of the top 100 Sexiest Women in the World, and not surprisingly Transformers babe Megan Fox took the top spot. She also came in first place on the list last year. Jessica Alba came in second, followed by Scarlett Johansson in third and Jessica Biel in fourth. Walking publicity stunt Heidi Montag man aged to make the list at number eight! While Megan Fox is considered the hottest woman in the world, she apparently doesn’t like looking at herself. "I never (look at myself), even in still photographs. I don't look at anything," Fox told Fox News. "I panic if there is a monitor in the room. I immediately go into like an anxiety attack. I'm insecure; I think most actors are pretty insecure." Danny can’t name a chick hotter than Megan Fox, but he doesn’t like that she’s in the #1 spot. Danny gets in trouble with Amy for his wandering eye, so there are gorgeous girls all over the city.
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is out in theaters today. Look for Metro around the city with a Transformers backpack he stole from Danny’s son Dante. 8:33 – Guess Who Tweeted
Imagine letting a goldfish swim across the sky. Let him swim from the east to the west. Drink a liter of water.
1. Courtney Love
2. Yoko Ono*
3. Joaquin Phoenix
Yes, I admit it. I am a motorcycle thief.
1. Leonard Nimoy
2. William Shatner*
3. Danny Bonaduce
Trying to get some Mormons at my show. Yessir.
1. Snoop Dogg*
2. Eminem
3. Dr. Dre
8:50 – Chazz Palminteri is on the show now. He’s the man behind A Bronx Tale, which introduced America to The Test. He didn’t realize that it would become part of American culture. He’s doing a one man stage show of A Bronx Tale at Harrah’s in Atlantic City in July. Many people remember that scene, but Danny also loves that Sonny LoSpecchio shot a guy over a parking space. There were lots of grey areas in the movie, Sonny vs. Rober DeNiro’s Lorenzo Anello. The movie is very close to Chazz’s real life. He was getting many offers to turn his story into a movie, but he wanted to act in the film and turned down many offers for the project. DeNiro came to see the stage show and proposed that he play Lorenzo, Chazz play Sonny, Chazz would write the screenplay and DeNiro would direct it.
9:19 – Shila stole a Transformer from the batch of Transformers that Metro stole from Danny’s son Dante. Metro found it attractive that a girl would be interested enough in his Transformers to take one. Shila has a whole collection of old school Transformers and Star Wars toys. Two adults are fighting over a toy now. Danny stops the fight pointing out that he gave them to Metro, but Shila wants him to take one back for her. Scott calls with a solution to the problem. Give them to him! Metro hangs up on Scott.
A prosecutor in southeastern Pennsylvania says a 16-year-old boy was shot dead in October and his body was cut up with two chain saws and put in the trash. Authorities haven't recovered Aaron Turner's body, but blood and human tissue on both chain saws match Turner's DNA. The 29-year-old Laquanta Chapman of Coatesville and 19-year-old Bryan Byrd of Newark, N.J., are charged in Turner's death. Both were already jailed on other charges. Danny thinks that anyone who could write movies like Saw, Hostel and Seven have something wrong with them.
A suspect is in custody after he allegedly opened fired in the La Quintana Restaurant in Feltonville that left one person dead and six others wounded over the weekend. Police said 22-year-old Pedro Colon is facing charges of murder, attempted murder, driving under the influence and related offenses after his arrest Sunday evening. Officers spotted Colon driving erratically in a black Buick before striking a parked vehicle. Police were forced to tase Colon following a brief foot pursuit and struggle.
Investigators said that the train that caused the fatal collision in Washington, D.C. Monday should not have been operating. The train was part of an old fleet of trains that U.S. government officials had tried to phase out because of safety concerns. However, the National Transportation Safety Board said the Metrorail transit system kept the old trains running despite the warnings in 2006. The crash, which occurred during rush-hour Monday, killed nine people and injured more than 70.
Ukrainian customs had seized 250 tortoises that a passenger had tried to smuggle across the former Soviet republic's eastern border aboard a sleeper train. A citizen of Uzbekistan was found to have hidden 250 tortoises behind a panel in the toilet and between sleepers two and three. The statement said the tortoises, valued at the equivalent of $2,300), had been confiscated. At least they weren’t found during a cavity search.
A man in Maine broke into the Portland Lobster Co. and scarfed down 11 prepared lobsters worth about $300. Then he washed down his meal with some white wine. Guess all that feasting made him sleepy, because when workers arrived the next morning, they discovered the suspect asleep on a bench. The Portland Press Herald reported that the hungry thief Paul Bruneau also left a refrigerator open, spoiling about $1,000 worth of food. Danny could never spend $300 on a meal. He’d rather take a hoagie and some swill and save the cash.
10:02 – Danny’s Final Thought: I seem to be evolving as a human being. I think I am smart enough to realize that I did my very best work drunk.
6:02 – I can’t believe Danny Bonaduce is my dad. Danny’s daughter Isabella is in the studio today. Shila thinks she’s spunky, which describes a pornstar. Shila and Metro are obsessed with watching the Live In It and Win live stream on 94WYSP.com, it looks like four dead people in a car, which isn’t that much of a stretch for South Philly. Danny took Isabella around Philly, she learned how to order a cheese steak. Danny’s son Dante is just sitting at the house playing video games. Isabella is wearing a “Jose Canseco” style shirt, where it looks like she has tattoos, everyone gives her a double take. Danny once rented the hotel room that Sid Viscous allegedly killed his girlfriend in and put bloody hand prints all over the walls. Metro is excited that Danny has a functioning child who is normal, just like Danny driving a car was such a curious thing the first time Metro saw Danny do it. Isabella won’t admit that Danny is a civilized man (he did throw her TV out of her window once). Isabella once told Gretchen that she didn’t have to listen to her and if she touched her she would call the cops, so Danny threw her TV out of her window. Isabella once broke Danny’s arm, and another time Danny was teaching Isabella how to ride a bike and once he let go she fell over a curb, breaking her arm. You throw electronics out the window and you will get some respect! Well, not really. The Live In It and Win contestants aren’t too exciting, Shila thinks they look like the dead couple in the Cadillac in Good Fellas. Vivian Campbell is on the show later, Def Leppard is at the Susquehanna Bank Center tonight, kicking off their tour with Poison, whose lead singer Brett Michaels is on the show later as well. 6:38- SPORTS- Cardinals first baseman Albert Pujols has overtaken Phillies second baseman Chase Utley as the NL’s leading vote getter in All-Star game voting. Suspended Dodgers outfielder Manny Ramirez is in sixth place among outfielders.
Ryan Howard, whose 343 game playing streak ended Sunday, is recovering at his house, after being diagnosed with acute sinusitis by Phillies team physician, Marc Harwood. The team said if Howard is feeling better he could re-join the team as the head to Tampa to take on the Rays tonight in a World Series rematch.
It was a day late, but 29-year-old Lucas Glover is your U.S. Open champion. It's only the second win of his PGA Tour career. He finished two strokes over Phil Mickelson. Tiger Woods, meanwhile, left the course even par and tied for sixth four shots behind Glover.
Former San Diego quarterback and overall bust Ryan Leaf is out on $15,000 bail after finally turning himself in on drug charges Friday. Leaf faces one count of burglary to a habitation, seven counts of obtaining a controlled substance by fraud and one count of delivery of a simulated controlled substance. Leaf is now back in Washington State after posting bail, where he awaits trial.
Lenny Dykstra is featured on “Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel” tonight talking about how he owes a lot of money to a lot of people, after being featured in March 2008 for his successes in finances. On the heels of widespread claims that the jet-setting Dykstra has left a string of unpaid bills in his wake - in fact, he would appear to be broke - Goldberg assembled six people who say that Dykstra has stiffed them, including a flight attendant who said that Dykstra charged $10,700 on her credit card to reserve a private plane in Ohio. Others said they are owed even more by Dykstra, who is entangled in a web of personal issues that includes the divorce from his wife of 23 years and the foreclosure of the $18.5 million estate he purchased from hockey legend Wayne Gretzky.
6:50 – Isabella was recently on an episode of Kat Von Dee’s new show. She was there with Danny’s friend Jason from the band Black President. Isabella asked Danny to call her friend Sebastian… Bach from Skid Row, because she’s afraid he has fallen off of the wagon. It’s weird for Danny that his daughter is hanging out with famous people, it used to seem normal in LA but now that he lives in Philly, he feels disassociated with that world. Danny doesn’t want her hanging out with Kat Von Dee, though. Shila thinks that so cool though. Marilyn Manson once read a bed time story to Isabella, and that scared the crap out of Danny, not him being in her bed room, the story was REALLY scary.
7:00- Gibbons is down at Tony Luke’s with the Live In It and Win contestants. They’re sleeping and boring. So he woke them up. Tourettes Joe’s friends are not there but they’ll be back. Awesome Airen is the popular pick to be the first one out of the car (33 to 1 odds according to Spike), she sounds like she just woke up. Airen doesn’t care that people think she’ll be the first one out, she’s just going to sleep through it all. She thinks its going to get down and dirty today, someone might get kicked out because of something that happened last night, but Airen won’t talk about it. Barley Legal Michelle says she doesn’t know what happened, she was sleeping through it all, someone put a phone in her face and asked her if she agreed, she doesn’t know what happened. So we move on to Tourette’s Joe for answers, there was an issue with one of the females, who wanted out of the car, she was making certain noises in the middle of the night… interesting. Gibbons will remain at Tony Luke’s to get some answers.
7:17- NEWS Bonnie Sweeten, the woman accused of faking her abduction and taking her 9-year-old daughter to Disney World waived her right to a preliminary hearing on charges of identity theft and false reporting, when she could have challenged evidence in the case.. "She realizes fully now that it took a lot of resources and a lot of manpower to solve what turns out to be not a crime," her defense lawyer said after Sweeten left a small Bucks County courthouse with her husband. It costs a lot of money to chase a criminal. Danny once cost the city of Phoenix $250,000 on a chase for just a mile. She went all of the way to Disney World, that’s a lot of money!
OBAMA SIGNS ANTI-SMOKING BILL- that’s why he killed the fly, he needed a cigarette and was frustrated.
7:32 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Mikes son’s 13 year old friend had an anxiety attack at his house yesterday. His parents are splitting up, and he doesn’t want them to get back together because his step dad has hit him on several occasions. The dad tells the kid if he tells on him the situation will only get worse. Danny has never raised a hand towards a child, but has struck numerous adults. The kid told Mike he has been hit, so he is legally obligated to go to law enforcement officials. Mike spoke to the mother and wants to give her the chance to take action befor he does. Danny doesn’t think putting it up to the mom is a good idea, because now there is a witness to the fact that he did not make any attempt to help the child, he could become an accessory. Mike will immediately report it to the authorities.
Sarah is concerned that her brother’s fiancé is taking all of his money. He inherited a lot of money when his mother passed. And it’s his first relationship. He pays for everything for her, car insurance, car payments and computers. He is only 21 years old. Danny says hes too young and if its his first relationship it is probably going to end in divorce.
7:52- Vivian Campbell of Def Leppard is on the phone. Def Leppard and Poison are kicking off their summer tour in Camden tonight. Vivian and Danny used to be neighbors, and Vivian would always be at his house teaching his kids how to play soccer. Vivian was fired from White Snake and by Ronnie James Dio, not Def Leppard because they’re a real band. Isabella used to sing with Viv all of the time. He once gave Danny a guitar lesson, which was one of the most intimidating nights of his life.
Phil Collen, the other guitarist in Def Leppard, is an MMA fighter and Danny is offering to fight him, to let Phil knock him out on TV.
With all of the big bands on the bill its hard to play all of their best songs, but there will be a nice mix at the show. Def Lep is huge in Ireland because half of the band spends most of their time living there. Lead singer, Joe Elliott is a great singer and real funny guy, but everyone is funny with a few drinks in them. Viv tells Danny the neighborhood is a lot quieter since hes moved out. Def Leppard and Poison tonight at the Susquehanna Bank Center, the entire station will be there.
8:00- Down at Tony Luke’s, there is no controversy in the car, there was a female problem, and the girl toughed it out. The contestants are still sleeping, are they on narcotics? Awesome Airen is annoyed at Gibbons for bothering her, Shila’s proud of her for toughing it out. See for yourself at 94WYSP.com. Isabella thinks by Friday all of the contestants will be trying to kill eachother. Almost Army John seems perkier than everyone else and than yesterday, it doesn’t matter how he’s feeling, he’s just not going to get out of the car. Everyone seems strong and he’s not worried about what they do, because he’s NOT GETTING OUT OF THE CAR. Metro thinks its great dinner theater, grab a roast pork with provolone and broccoli raab and just watch them.
8:11- ENTERTAINMENT: Jon and Kate Gosselin of TLC’s Jon & Kate Plus 8 are divorcing. They made the official announcement on an hour-long special broadcast last night. Kate filed the papers in a Pennsylvania court Monday. Kate said in a statement,"While there are reasons why it was appropriate and necessary for me to initiate this proceeding, I do not wish to discuss those reasons at this time, in the hope that all issues will be resolved amicably between Jon and myself. As always, my first priority remains our children." Jon responded with a statement saying, "In terms of my marriage, it’s no secret that the past six months or so have been very difficult for Kate and me. We are no different than other couples and parents who are facing a crossroads in their marriage. I am of course deeply saddened that we are divorcing." The couple said on the show that they would keep the Pennsylvania house they share with their eight-year-old twins and five-year-old sextuplets and take turns living there. … Kate’s about as perky as the contestants in the Mustang. They are going to keep the kids at the house and take turns living in the house, its civilized and easier on the kids. She caused this divorce by being an outrageous bitch, Isabella heard he was cheating, Danny says yes there was cheating, tell Gretchen “I’m sorry.”
- Isabella thinks he’s a douche for not liking the game. Danny is actually considering drum lessons as a result of playing Rock Band, he never wanted to play bass when he faked in The Partridge Family, and regrets it.
Why would Chris need domestic violence classes, he seems to be great at it. Isabella thinks Chris Brown should go to jail, she knows her stuff, and has more rock cred than Danny does.
Alice Cooper- Isabella has less of a chance of being rebellious like her father as a result of her father’s actions, except for the violence. She always gets into fights at school, and its not necessarily her fault. Breaking Bonaduce was tough on Danny’s family, but Isabella is doing fine. She’s hanging out with rockstars!
8:30- Brett Michaels from Poison on the phone. Danny thanks him for getting hit in the face with the wall at the Tony Awards last week, because it gave the show Famous Head Injuries Through History! Brett knows his Gary Busey trivia questions. Brett thought doing the Tony Awards would be great, because the show Rock of Ages was such a hit, and he was amazed with how crazy it is backstage at an awards show, trumps a rock and roll concert. He says things were going to smoothly at the Tony Awards, and it was all last minute. He ran off the stage and was excited with how good the song went, and next thing he knew he saw monkeys and thought he went to Oz.
9:06- Ed McMahon from The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson died this morning. He has been in and out of the hospital recently from Pneumonia.
9:07- LISTENER MAIL- Ray is stuck in the friend zone with all girls, he's just a nice girl. Can Danny help? YES. Friends help friends, so a girl who is a friend should be willing to have sex with you because she wants to help you out.
Jack- 13 yrs old, he loves the show despite his age, he even built his own radio, the show is the best thing in his life. Life goes down hill from here though
Shawn- thinks its cool to see Danny walking around town like a regular joe. But there is nothing Regular about Danny and his bedazzled appearance.
Cindy- Made advances at Danny at Adelphia's, he said to go and ask Amy, so she did. Danny just wants to know what Amy's response is.
9:31- NEWS- Airport passenger arrested- Shila believes he didn’t mean to bring it, but you break the law you break law. Danny had to cross the Tijuana border with his pockets bulging with illegal substances, no ones that stupid, except for Danny Bonaduce.
Craigslist killer- Danny thinks he should go to jail for life, and is for the death penalty, assuming they caught the right guy. He even supports an eye for eye, Johnny Depp would look cute with an eye patch.
COOKIE DOUGH- Metro remembers being a kid riding his bike eating cookie dough, Danny remembers all the way back to when he was 49 sucking down cookie dough from the tube. Beer bongs and Cookie dough, its all about sucking at the Bonaduce house. If Danny wasn’t committed to putting his hand in a tank of pirhanna this week, he’d go eat tainted cookie dough. Danny wouldn’t be surprised if eating the cookie dough is what kills him. What killed Danny Bonaduce? Chocolate Chips.
Aaron wants to know if Danny knows that pirhanna won’t attack his hand, but because last week he burnt a cigarette on his hand showing Metro how to win in arm wrestling, Danny is pretty sure that his hand will be bit off.
Boulder Colorado- IN Sacramento you can’t park in your driveway, either in your garage or in a assigned parking space. He wants to be able to keep his Easter Bunny up as long as he wants, whose this guy to say he can’t.
6:02 – Danny’s kids came to town last night and he’s fired up about having them here. Somehow his alarm didn’t go off on time and woke up 12 minutes after the boss wanted him at Tony Luke’s for the Live In It And Win broadcast. It was probably Dante that hit the snooze button on the alarm. That’s Danny’s story and sticking to it. Rather than ride the motorcycle he took a cab at 5:50 and realized that on the way there he forgot his wallet. Danny might be in store for some excellent quality time with his daughter Isabella after she hurt her ankle before flying out. She wants to get her bellybutton pierced and Danny’s down with it. If Gretchen let her get her nose pierced then this is allowable, especially when she offered to do it on the air. That’s daddy’s little girl. Danny might get one too. Three Bonaduces in one town could be a trouble for Philadelphia. Live In It And Win is going to be interesting. There are people with prescription medicine issues. Put four people in a confined space for a long period time and crazy stuff is going to happen. The strategies will be interesting. 6:30 – SPORTS: The Baltimore Orioles completed a three-game sweep of the Phillies with a 2-1 victory Sunday. "If we can find a way to lose one, that's what's happening," said Phillies manager Charlie Manuel, ejected in the eighth inning for arguing a call at first base.
Ryan Howard was released from the hospital Sunday but did not play for the Philadelphia Phillies against Baltimore, ending his consecutive games streak at 343. Howard was hospitalized Saturday for the second time in two nights with flu symptoms. The slugger was released Sunday but was not at the ballpark for Philadelphia's 2-1 loss to the Orioles.
6:33 – 6:50- Isabella was recently on an episode of Kat Von Dee’s new show. She was there with Danny’s friend Jason from the band Black President. Isabella asked Danny to call her friend Sebastian… Bach from Skid Row, because she’s afraid he has fallen off of the wagon. It’s weird for Danny that his daughter is hanging out with famous people, it used to seem normal in LA but now that he lives in Philly, he feels disassociated with that world. Danny doesn’t want her hanging out with Kat Von Dee, though. Shila thinks that so cool though. Marilyn Manson once read a bed time story to Isabella, and that scared the crap out of Danny, not him being in her bed room, the story was REALLY scary.
6:52 – CBS3’s Lesley Van Arsdall is live on location at Tony Luke’s for Live In It And Win. Today’s kick off was a no brainer for the station to cover. Danny would never enter a contest he couldn’t smoke in. Lesly usually covers accidents, fires, and robberies. Is she at home in South Philly? No comment! Lesley’s anticipating that Jon and Kate Gosselin will announce they’re divorcing. Danny's fiancee Amy thinks that they might announce that they're expecting another baby. Whatever it is, they'll win the ratings game.
7:06 – News with Shila:
Seven people were shot including one 29 year old man who is now dead after a shooting at the La Quinta restaurant in the Feltonville section of Philadelphia early Sunday morning. The shooting happened after a customer was removed from the bar after reportedly starting a scuffle. He then returned and started shooting at people in the restaurant. Five of the wounded are reportedly in stable condition at a local hospital. One of the victims is listed in critical condition at this time.
New Castle County police have arrested a husband and wife for felony drug violations after a massive marijuana growing operation was discovered on at their home. Police found grow lamps, egg crates, plastic plant pots, a large amount of marijuana seeds and 26 pounds of harvested marijuana. Prior to police entering the home, a DEA Clan Lab Team entered the premises to ensure that no mold or oxygen depletion was taking place in the confined spaces of the home. The couple has been charged with trafficking marijuana, possession with the intent to deliver marijuana and maintaining a dwelling for keeping a controlled substance. Hydro operations suck up oxygen, that’s why the police will go in with hazmat suits.
Philip Markoff, better known as the Craiglist killer, accused of killing a 25-year-old masseuse he met through Craigslist has been indicted by a grand jury. His indictment on charges of first-degree murder and other crimes moves his case from district court to Superior Court, where he is scheduled to be arraigned today. He was indicted for the April 14 shooting of 25-year-old Julissa Brisman of New York, who advertised on the "exotic services" section of Craigslist at the Boston Marriott Copley Place hotel. He was also charged with armed robbery that took place April 10th. This has been one busy boy. He may have wrecked Craigslist, but we still have the City Paper.
A Chicago couple married in surgical masks and latex gloves Sunday after learning less than 48 hours before that they both had swine flu. The couple went ahead with the ceremony after doctors assured them guests wouldn't be at serious risk. However, they didn’t want to take any chances so they kept a 10-foot distance from family and friends at all times. They both joked about getting the swine flu after both experienced vomiting, achy limbs and fever. But they never thought they really had it. If Danny stayed at least 10 feet from his wife and her family he’d still be married to her today. It’s all downhill for them now.
According to a book called "Who's Been Sleeping In Your Head: The Secret World of Sexual Fantasies?" nine out of ten people admit to having sexual fantasies. At the same time, 95% of people have never talked about their fantasies to another person. Probably because they're embarrassed or ashamed. So here are three reasons why you shouldn’t be afraid of your sex fantasies, Who’s the 1 out of 10 that isn’t having sexual fantasies? That’s a liar.
1. FANTASIES HELP YOUR SEX LIFE. They increase desire and arousal. And people who fantasize a lot tend to have MORE sex than people who don't.
2. "WEIRD" SEX FANTASIES AREN'T ACTUALLY ALL THAT WEIRD. A lot of people feel ashamed or guilty for fantasizing. --But you'd be surprised how many other people actually have the same kinds of fantasies. Danny doesn't like food in bed, but Shila likes whipped cream and edible oils. Danny's tried it all, even mangos.
3. THEY KEEP YOU FROM BEING REPRESSED. Doctors used to think people had sex fantasies about things they actually wanted to go through with. But according to research, most people fantasize about things they'd never do in real life. This is where Danny's gotten into some trouble, he's usually the one stuck with the discomfort.
7:30 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Danny reads a letter from a listener whose son is being bullied by a much bigger kid at school. There are two ways to handle this; the first is to report it to the administrators at school who will have to take action. The second way is land a fist to the face of the bad kid. It will boost his self esteem and his image at school.
Dan calls to say that he cheated on his girlfriend non-stop while his girlfriend was overseas studying abroad. His problem is that he’s been exposed to fun, new things in the bedroom. He doesn’t plan on telling her. Being interested in new sexual experiences can be a tell that cheating has been going on. The way to win is to make he think that they’re all her ideas. Chances are she fooled around too.
Leigh met a man she had some fun, wild sex with. He said that he was in the process of breaking up with his girlfriend, so it surprised Leigh when she woke up and saw the girl outside her house. She hired private investigator and wants to know what to expect. They can find anything on you with the exception of medical records. Danny warns her to watch out for being with a cheater, but Leigh is into open relationships. BONUS! Eventually Leigh or the girlfriend will tire and give up on the guy.
7:47 – Danny checks in with Gordon who’s standing next to the Mustang talking to the Live In It And Win contestants. There’s no hatred yet. So far they’ve bonded, but it hasn’t been a memorable experience. Joeseph, the guy who barks, does not drive with his head out the window. The most interesting tale that John had to share was that he once spilled tea on himself. Impressive. Airen is tucked away in the back seat, which is comfy. Joseph is a truck driver when he’s not trying to win a Mustang. Apparently he didn’t really get permission from the boss for the contest. The other three are jobless.
8:06 – Entertainment News:
This time last year, Megan Fox and Shia LaBeouf and the rest of the Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen cast were filming around Philadelphia, shooting inside Eastern State Penitentiary, in Fairmount Park, at Drexel and Penn, and dressing up City Hall's courtyard to look like a Parisian cafe. Apparently, the cafe gets blown to bits. "It was great," says Ian Bryce, the sequel's producer,” We were in Philly for two weeks, had wonderful cooperation throughout the city, from the mayor's office, the film commission, and everybody that we dealt with." Transformers: Revenge of the fallen opens everywhere Wednesday.
“The Proposal’ featuring Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds took in $34.1 million to open as the weekend's No. 1 movie, beating out "The Hangover," which slipped to second place with $26.9 million.
1. "The Proposal," $34.1 million.
2. "The Hangover," $26.9 million.
3. "Up," $21.3 million.
3. "Year One," $20.2 million.
5. "The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3," $11.3 million.
Ex-Warrant singer Jani Layne was busted for a DUI last week, but he has much bigger problems. The Detroit News says Jani owes 121,024-dollars in back taxes. The I.R.S. put a lien against the singer and his ex-wife back in 2005. Jani reportedly owes federal income tax from 1996 to 2003. Based upon penalties and fines Danny estimates that Jani hasn’t been making much money lately.
Michael Richards, the Emmy-winning actor who played Kramer on "Seinfeld" is "a new man," according to Larry David, the co-creator of the legendary sitcom. Richards' saw his career ground to a halt in 2006 after he was captured on a cell phone camera delivering an alcohol-fueled racist tirade at some hecklers watching his routine at a Los Angeles. But now Richards, and Kramer, are back. In fact all of the "Seinfeld" stars -- Richards, Julia Louis Dreyfus, Jason Alexander and Jerry Seinfeld -- appear later this summer in about half the episodes of the new season of David's "Curb Your Enthusiasm" on HBO. David said “He used to be very angry and bitter. He's completely different now. You can see it, and he can feel it. I'm very happy for him."
Lenny Kravitz is not having any sex these days, and that's the way he wants it. He took a vow of celibacy four years ago because he wants to wait until he's found the right woman before he goes to bed with her. This from a guy who's had relationships with Madonna, Nicole Kidman, Kylie Minogue, and Lisa Bonet (the mother of their daughter) and who knows how many others. But Lenny says he hopes he finds her soon, because he needs it bad. Shila would take Prince over Lenny Kravitz any day. Danny scolds her for that choice.
8:27 – The Art of Manliness:
Today’s lesson is all about James Bond. Drink a martini, make a cosmo for a girl and take her to bed.
First up buy expensive liquor and don’t ever get rid of the bottles, just refill them with alcohol of lower standards. Learn to pour by count, not measurement. Use a bigger glass so the woman drinks more, but the drink isn’t so strong that it’s a put off. Danny uses the props he brought to Tony Luke’s to make martinis for Shila and Metro. Shila’s extremely impressed.
8:49 – Danny checks in with Jennifer Reed who is now the fifth person in the Mustang. She’s running psychological profiles on the contestants. Jennifer thinks it’s bad that John, Joseph, Michele, and Airen are being friendly. It’s a competition. Danny thinks that they need to read each other and true strategies will be revealed at the early hours.
9:05 – Tony Luke joins Danny on the air. He worked hard to research and develop a grocery store cheese steak. For years people asked him to deliver cheesesteak across the world, he wanted to come up with a cheesesteak that travels well , holds up, and can be microwaved anywhere in the country. He admits that they’ll never be as good as a cheesesteak fresh off the grill, but it’s the best you’ll find in the freezer section. Tony is also an actor and stars in a movie loosely based on his father’s life; The Nail: The Story of Joey Nardone. Tony signed on to have Live In It And Win Mustang at his place because he has a demented sense of humor.
9:29 – News with Shila:
A Vineland man who struggled with a police officer trying to arrest him fired four shots from the officer's weapon. He was finally retrained and has been charged with attempted murder. No one was injured. Police initially attempted to make a motor vehicle stop shortly but the driver, fled in his vehicle. He was later spotted at an auto body shop, and their struggle began. He is being held in on $1 million cash bail.
Police in Albuquerque, New Mexico were still searching Sunday for at least two more suspects in a robbery at a Denny’s which left one teenage worker dead. 2 suspects were arrested almost immediately after the crime Saturday on suspicion of murder, kidnapping, robbery and child abuse because there were at least five children in the restaurant at the time. At least four masked men armed with rifles and handguns entered the crowded Denny’s around 9:30 a.m. and demanded money. A teenage female employee was shot and killed during the robbery. Police believe the men committed 10 similar robberies in the Albuquerque area in the past year. The men who were arrested are in their late 20s to early 30s and are from South America. Tragic story, but kids under 13 get to eat free on their birthdays.
A liquor store clerk's cell phone may have saved his life, when a robber tried to stab the clerk at with a knife. The robber dented the cell phone in the clerk's pocket, but did not injure him. The clerk, 59-year-old Joseph Wescott, then pulled a gun and shot the man in the abdomen. The clerk was given the pistol by his son. The suspect ran from the store and 30 minutes later a nearby hospital reported getting a patient with a gunshot wound. He will be charged with aggravated assault and attempted robbery. It’s definitely an AT&T phone because he’s going behind more bars in more places.
Several years ago, a 56-year-old Ethiopian guy decided he was so rich that in order to share his wealth he was going to become a polygamist. So he married 11 women who gave birth to 77 children. But now, he hates polygamy and he has even started telling his kids not to get married at all. Why? Because caring for them has left him completely broke. Ayattu says, quote, "I want my children to be farmers, but I have no land. I want them to go to school, but I have no money. I feel like killing myself when I see my hungry children whom I cannot help.”
Recently the digital TV switchover finally took place. And for an 86-year-old in Memphis, Tennessee it saved his life. Robert spends his afternoons watching TV in his bedroom. But on Friday, Robert had to watch TV in his kitchen because it was the only TV in the house that had a digital converter box. While Robert was watching "Oprah", lightning struck a large red oak in his yard and it came crashing through his bedroom, and destroyed his home. Robert says, quote, "I couldn't watch it in the bedroom because I didn't have a box in there. Normally, if I had a box I'd have been in my bedroom . . . I figure that if I'd been in there, I'd be pushing up daisies, to tell you the truth. "It could have been a lot worse. “ If he had a box in his bedroom he wouldn’t be watching Oprah.
9:48 – Spike checks in. He’s about to take over and broadcast live from Tony Luke’s until three. All the contestants are doing well so far. Michele wants sushi. She’s single! John doesn’t want to go back to his terrible life without a car. After their first break the contestants will rotate. It’s time to get back in the car!
6:01 – Danny’s jeans are a little tight today, watch out for poppin’ buttons. Danny’s fiancée Amy gave him a news story about Craigslist executives being upset that their ad revenue for ‘adult services’ after the Craigslist Killer, are now going back to free periodicals like the Philadelphia Weekly and City Paper. Danny reads some ads for services of rub and tugs and transsexual specialty hookers. Sometimes it’s not so easy to tell the difference between the women and the transsexuals in the paper. Craigslist makes things safer for the girls working so they don’t have to take to the streets. Danny’s been to a few brothels and rub and tugs before. Not all of them are beauty queens, but that’s what eyelids are for. Danny’s been pleasantly surprised by their looks ¾ of the time. The only awkward moment at the massage parlor is when there’s a line in the waiting room on the way out. Danny’s got one down the block from his house in Old City. What was a victimless crime is now going to put the women in the line of danger now. Danny would like to license the workers and have them pay taxes on their income.
6:24 – Vera calls to say that she agrees that prostitution is a victimless crime and that women that marry for money are worse. Aren’t we done talking about Gretchen though? 6:40 – SPORTS: The Phillies continued their amazing home disappearing act yesterday, losing for the third straight day to Toronto and falling to 1-5 on this homestand. Charlie Manuel is close to taking things up a notch.
The struggling Phillies are going to have to get through at least the next two weeks without the hitter who has been their most productive so far this season. Raul Ibanez, who was leading the Phillies in hitting (.312) and was second in the National League with 22 home runs and 59 runs batted in, was put on the 15-day disabled list yesterday with a strained left groin.
Cleveland Browns receiver Donté Stallworth was indefinitely suspended by the NFL yesterday for driving drunk and killing a pedestrian in Miami. "The conduct reflected in your guilty plea resulted in the tragic loss of life and was inexcusable," commissioner Roger Goodell said in a letter to Stallworth.
Sixers star Andre Iguodala is being sued for child support by a South Jersey woman. Clayanna Warthen, 23, of Clementon, delivered the baby, London Iguodala, on May 7.
6:51 – June, a 5’9” blonde is in the studio to do Naked Weather. In a effort to fulfill listener demands for more nudity on the show Danny has asked for women to come in and do the weather without clothes on. She has D cup implants that Danny says feel natural. June would like to get back into bartending. Mostly cloudy, but no rain until tonight, with a high of 81. If you want to hire June to work at your bar, write her at funbohemians@aol.com. If you hire June you’re certain to get Danny as a frequent patron.
A recently retired South Jersey high school teacher is now a multi-millionaire thanks to a winning Powerball ticket. Pennsylvania Lottery officials said Thursday that Palmira Nicolo, known to friends and colleagues as Pam, just turned in a winning Powerball ticket she bought back in February. The ticket was worth a $46 million cash prize. For 25 years, Nicolo has taught Italian at Cherry Hill West High School. She decided to retire in May. Lottery officials say she lives in Montgomery County and chose not to take part in a public check presentation. Pam is splitting the jackpot with a Powerball player from Delaware who bought a winning ticket at a store in Dover.
The man widely recognized as the official Benjamin Franklin for the City of Philadelphia, suffered a stroke Wednesday morning at his home. Ralph Archbold, 67 is being evaluated at the University of Pennsylvania. His family reports that the iconic figure is tired and resting comfortably. Archbold, who began portraying Ben Franklin in 1973 at Deerfield Village in Michigan, has been in Philadelphia since 1982 where he quickly gained wide-spread acclaim and national attention. His numerous television appearances include every network morning program, the History Channel, the Super Bowl, the Daily Show with Jon Stewart, and even a week as Stephen Colbert's "side-kick" on the Colbert Report. David Carradine impersonators must be having a tough time these days. Danny knows a Britney Spears impersonator that’s dating a Johnny Depp impersonator.
A Continental Airlines pilot died mid-flight yesterday and the two other trained pilots onboard landed the plane safely. Continental Flight 61 was flying from Belgium to Newark, New Jersey when the pilot collapsed at the controls about three hours into the flight. A Belgian doctor onboard was called to the cockpit to treat the 61-year-old pilot, but the doctor said he was "clinically dead" when he got to him. Continental said in a statement the pilot apparently died of natural causes. A federal air marshal and two additional trained pilots guided the plane holding 247 passengers to safety. If you’re going to die in a plane then the cockpit is the place to do it.
The Delaware State Fire Marshal's Office said a man damaged a toilet at an Arby's by setting off fireworks in the bathroom Thursday morning. Authorities said no one was injured, although five employees and two customers were in the restaurant. The man fled the restaurant right before the people inside heard a loud blast from the bathroom. Employees found a damaged toilet in the bathroom after the man left in a brown pickup truck. Was the truck brown before the explosion?
A man in Oklahoma City said he was attacked for his bologna and cheese sandwich. Police say 24-year-old Roger Hamilton told them he was sitting on a bus station bench Wednesday, about to put mayonnaise on his sandwich, when another man began staring at him. Then the man punched him and grabbed his sandwich and left. The value of the sandwich is at 76 cents. Police have not found the attacker. Danny doesn’t believe it. He thinks it’s bologna. 7:29 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Sam’s girlfriend has a pain issue and suddenly the doctor cut her pain meds in half after the insurance company questioned his prescription. In the past all doctors were rich. These days medical malpractice insurance is out of hand and they have to cut costs. If the doctor intentionally left the woman suffering that could be malpractice. Ask to the doctor to his face if he did it for money and it could lead to a reinstatement of the pills, but it could also be the case that he’s trying to ween her off unnecessary pain meds.
Jenn wants to get a protection order against her ex-boyfriend and wants to mess up his business. That could back fire big time. If she’s still interested in ruining his life in a month then maybe rethink it and Danny will give her some good ideas to extract revenge.
Nick asks if he should mess around with a woman he’s known for 20 years that has a boyfriend in jail. Don’t do it. Messing around with a cheater will only get you cheated on.
Mark’s 19 year-old niece is running around with her 17 year-old boyfriend that he feels is not a good influence on her. She’s reached out to him for help again, but should he step in only for her to run off again? If she gets used to this behavior of lowering the bar then she’ll settle for less. Danny tells Mark to take her back in and guide her in the right direction.
7:50 – Lou Ferrigno is on the show, he’ll be at Wizard World Philadelphia this weekend. Of course we know him as the Incredible Hulk, but he had a good run on King of Queens and in I Love You Man. At one point Lou had a 60” chest. He’s been lifting for 25 years. He took some time off in the ‘80’s but came back with a vengeance in the ‘90’s. Is he training Michael Jackson? He can’t confirm or deny. Danny takes that as a yes. Danny used to train with Lou too. They worked at Lou’s house and would push Danny to his limits of pain. He could read Danny’s lips in the mirror when he was cursing Lou for feeling too much burn. Go see Lou at Wizard World this weekend!
8:11 – Entertainment News:
When crews were cleaning up after last weekend's Bonnaroo Festival in Manchester, Tennessee, they found a rather disturbing souvenir: a dead body. A local newspaper says local police believe it's a man in his 20's from Alabama. He was discovered dead in a tent on Tuesday. There were no signs of trauma and the man was last seen alive on Monday around 3PM. Bonnaroo had some big acts this year including Bruce Springsteen, Nine inch Nails, Beastie Boys, Snoop Dog, Public Enemy and hundreds of other bands and acts. Dead guy in a tent? Sign of a great party.
Jani Lane, frontman for the 90's hair band Warrant was arrested late Wednesday night on suspicion of driving drunk. The Los Angeles Times says police pulled Jani over in the San Fernando Valley and booked him. He posted 30,000-dollars bail yesterday afternoon and was released. Instead of Cherry Pie he can sing DUI.
According to TLC’s new promo for its one-hour episode of Jon & Kate Plus 8, Jon and Kate Gosselin have an announcement to make. In the commercial, Kate says, "Recently, we’ve made some life-changing decisions — decisions that will affect every member of our family, ones that we hope will bring each of us some peace." What could it possibly be? A source close to the situation tells RadarOnline.com exclusively that Kate has met with a divorce lawyer, and the couple will indeed split. Guess we’ll have to wait until Monday’s episode to find out for certain. Real men don’t watch Jon & Kate Plus 8. Danny gets upset when Amy watches awful television on his time. Breaking Bonaduce was Jon & Kate Plus 8 Personality Disorders.
The list of celebrities who'll get stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame next year have been announced. Here are the big ones . . .
Russell Crowe, Adam Sandler, Bill Maher, Ringo Starr, James Cameron, John Cusack, Colin Firth, Randy Newman, Emma Thompson, Mark Wahlberg, Chris Berman, Jon Cryer, Peter Graves, Jimmy Kimmel, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Sam Waterson, Bryan Adams, ZZ Top, Van Morrison, Alan Jackson, Chaka Kahn.
Why doesn’t Danny have a star? Celebrities can get their own star with 3500 signatures and $2500. There’s no real criteria for awarding them other than that. Danny’s house in Los Angeles is near where the Hollywood Walk of Fame starts, but he can’t remember the names of any of the stars on his block. They must not be stars then. 8:30 – Sixers Dancers, Kate and Chenelle, are in the studio to talk about Sixers Dancer auditions. Danny still hasn’t taken up Hip Hop’s challenge to dunk off a trampoline at halftime at a Sixers game. Shila’s pondering trying out for the dance team; she danced for the Red Storm when she went to St. John’s. Kate’s in a new Salad Works commercial, the guy in the commercial in NOT her boyfriend. She’s single! Kate’s goal is to be a math teacher. The rehearsals are tough, they’ll go up to 45 minutes without a break, but they get into incredible shape quickly. Kate’s also an avid camper. RV’s and cabins are off limits when she hits the woods. Danny hasn’t been interested in camping since he saw an episode of The Rifleman when Chuck Connors woke up with a rattlesnake near him. Kate brings some of the dancers with her when she goes camping. Now Danny’s interested. Danny prefers to be elevated when sleeping, maybe he can borrow Shila’s air mattress. She’s been sleeping on one since she moved back to Philly.
8:51 – Danny calls the third person selected to be in 94WYSP’s Live In It And Win, a woman named Amy whose husband is serving overseas in Iraq. It would be like camping in a car to Kate. Amy calls back. She doesn’t have a strategy to win just yet, but assumes she’ll win. Cell phones, computers, and iPods won’t be allowed in the car though. What’s her husband going to think about her attempt to win a Mustang by living in car? He’ll have something nice to drive when he comes back home. Tonight at Adelphia’s in Deptford is the last Casting Call for Live In It And Win. Kate’s strategy to win would be to drive others crazy while keeping herself sane.
9:05 – Danny’s kids are coming out on Sunday, just in time for Father’s Day. Danny doesn’t celebrate many holidays, but wants to make this week a great one. He found a list of thngs that fathers should teach their kids.
Danny’s dad didn’t show him how to bait a hook, but how to bait people into arguments. Danny doesn’t come from a sporting family. He didn’t get balls thrown at him, just ash trays or anything that was within reach. Danny’s taken his daughter fishing, but not his son just yet.
Danny’s dad taught him perseverance and a tolerance for pain. Brains are equal to brawn too. Danny’s dad would grab toys out of a large bag on Christmas, throw in on the floor and have the kids fight over it. If one of the kids won a present that wasn’t intended for them then they were chastised for pursuing a gift that wasn’t for them.
Mike calls to say that he had to teach himself to be a man because his father was in and out of jail. That’s when mothers step up. Tim calls to say that he wants to train his son to be a badass assassin. Bitchin’.
9:42 – News with Shila:
A Delaware County elderly couple is celebrating their 80th wedding anniversary and the distinction of being the longest married couple in the United States. Bill and Marie Decaro, both 100-years-old, will celebrate their 80th wedding anniversary this coming Saturday. Bill said he met his lovely bride at a dancing school at 12th and Chestnut Streets. Bill left school after 8th grade with aspirations of forming a vaudeville act with his brother, but the pair needed a third person for their act and he thought Marie would be a perfect fit. So what's their secret to such a long and happy life together? "We don't believe in getting mad at each other, we express ourselves, but that's the extent of it," Bill explained. They say it's the laughter that helps make every day special. Danny was hoping the secret to their marriage was drinking and smoking. For their 81st anniversary they’re going to celebrate by dying.
The new Apple iPhone 3G S hits stores today. The 3G S is faster and has better battery life than the previous version of the iPhone and includes some new features like video recording and voice control. The 3G S will be available for $199 (16GB) and $299 (32GB) for all new AT&T customers and existing AT&T customers who have fulfilled their contract. Those who already own an iPhone are being offered an iPhone 3.0 software upgrade for free. Danny’s phone will drive him to the store soon.
PETA wants the President Obama to try taking a more of a humane attitude the next time he's annoyed by a fly in the White House. PETA is sending President Barack Obama a Katcha Bug Humane Bug Catcher, a device that allows users to trap a house fly and then release it outside. "We support compassion even for the most curious, smallest and least sympathetic animals," PETA spokesman said. During an interview for CNBC at the White House on Tuesday, a fly intruded and Obama's killed it. If the president has the free time to rescue bugs then he’s not doing a good job.
This four-year-old in England, Daniel Blair accidentally flushed his puppy down the toilet after deciding to clean the pet. His mother said "Daniel told me it had got muddy so they put it in the toilet and pulled the chain to give it a wash. I ran to the bathroom but the dog was nowhere to be seen." The tiny week-old cocker spaniel was trapped in a drain pipe for nearly four hours before being rescued by a drainage company. Why hasn’t PETA sent this kid a bug catcher? Danny’s surprised that the pup didn’t drown.
An irate driver in Romania bit a pedestrian because he took too long to cross the road! Driver Radu Becali is being charged with assault after leaping from his car and allegedly sinking his teeth into 36-year-old man's belly. "He just shouted at me and then grabbed me by the belly with his teeth. He tore my shirt and I have a pretty nasty wound now," he said. That's some heavy duty road rage, but in the end, it proved to be a wake-up call for poor man. "I didn't ever think I was slow at crossing the road. But drivers often beep their horns at me and I just thought they were being friendly," he said. Guess he had it coming, then. If Danny bit pedestrians that took their sweet time he wouldn’t go hungry. Danny doesn’t like meanderers or strollers.
9:55 – Danny, Spike, and Metro all have ‘uniforms.’ Danny digs tight jeans and sparkly shirts. Spike wears Chucks, jeans, and goofy t-shirts. Metro wears leather jackets, scarves, and a cap. Einstein used to wear the same outfit every day so he wouldn’t have to think about what he was going to wear every day.
6:02 – Danny is feeling much better today. He’s still on a quest to find a Wicked Weather Woman for the show. A woman who is nude while doing the weather on the air. There was an offer from a woman in Florida to do it over the phone, not good enough. Danny’s can’t get a naked woman in the studio, but there’s a photo of his fiancee’s chest in all it’s glory on the internet somewhere. Danny calls her up to alert her to the fact that the photo might be a little too revealing. Under further review it turns out there there’s a lot of cleavage, but no nipplage. It’s the default photo at myspace.com/bonaduce318
6:11 – Danny made plans with Metro and Gibbons to go to a strip club and Amy’s not invited. It’s a guy’s night out, but Metro and Gibbons didn’t know that they were going to a nudie bar. It used to be fun to take her to strip clubs when he thought she was bisexual, but she doesn’t trust him. If he goes he has to rebel against Amy, but if he doesn’t go then he’s submitting. Danny likes his dirty reputation, but doesn’t want to be so bad that he’s kept on a short leash. What’s the correct level of scumminess? Danny just wants to have a good time and bone some whores. Maybe Amy is right.
6:32 – Russ calls to say ask what Danny’s more committed to: the reputation or the woman? Obviously, the woman. There’s only one part of the reputation Danny wants. He works hard, doesn’t throw random punches at workers, but he did earn the cheater reputation. Danny’s not so wild really. How could Danny function without Amy? He needs her to turn the television on. Shila thinks that Amy needs to work on trusting Danny and letting him trust himself. 6:39 – SPORTS:
Jamie Moyer gave up six runs and the Phillies again struggled to score runs at home, falling 7-1 to the Blue Jays.
6:50 – Danny constantly warns against over the top weddings when there’s many years of marriage after the big ceremony. He found a new story about a woman who was looking for a stripper for her bachelorette party and found one. It was her fiancé who was also a porn star. She canceled the wedding. Danny doesn’t understand why she would want to bail on the man she wanted to marry. If the woman that Danny was going to marry was a porn start, he’d dump her…six months down the road. He’d enjoy some of the benefits of the porn star, like sleeping with her friends. That’s double standard Danny believes in. Any woman that’s slept with as many men as he has women is a slut and won’t be his wife or raise his children.
7:10 – News with Shila:
A former worker at an assisted living center in Montgomery County has been charged in the death of an Alzheimer's patient. Alvador Thompson is facing charges of involuntary manslaughter because he improperly fed hot cereal to 79-year-old Ronald Myers at the Cambridge-Brightfield Assisted Living Facility in Hatfield on October 8, 2008. Because the cereal was not cooled, the patient suffered burns to his mouth and throat. Even after being treated for his burns, the patent apparently stopped eating which resulted in his death on October 23. Apparently, Ronald was refusing to eat and the worker poured the hot oatmeal down his throat. Myers left behind a wife and six children. Danny would prefer to die by wood chipper than oatmeal overdose.
Burlington County prosecutors announced that the owner of a funeral home was indicted by a grand jury for using pre-paid funeral funds for personal expenses. Robert E. Warwick, 43, of Mount Laurel, NJ, owned the Snover Funeral Home in Beverly, which closed in 2007. The funeral was in the business of accepting advance payments from customers who wanted to cover their funeral expenses prior to death. Warwick was supposed to have been placing the money he received in an "Irrevocable Burial Account" where interest could be gained to ensure funds, but instead money was deposited into a general account and used for Warwick's personal expenses. According to prosecutors, a total of $52,273 from eight customers was misdirected into the personal account. There was no misdirection, it went right were Warwick wanted it to go.
The autopsies of the bodies recovered from the wreckage of Air France Flight 447 suggest that the jet broke apart in midair. According to a Brazilian official, all 50 bodies showed multiple fractures in the legs, hips and arms. According to former forensic expert at the U.S. National Transportation Safety Board, "Typically, if you see intact bodies and multiple fractures — arm, leg, hip fractures — it's a good indicator of a mid-flight break up.” Many of the bodies were found naked because the wind shredded them, that freaks Danny out.
A New York City man named Thomas Parkin, 49, was charged in a bizarre plot to impersonate his deceased mother so he could collect $117,000 in government benefits. Irene Prusik has been dead for six years. But in April, someone showed up at the Department of Motor Vehicles in Brooklyn to renew her driver's license. The explanation given by prosecutors rivals the Hitchcock classic "Psycho": It was her son, in drag. Parkin, who lived with his mother, was accused of hatching the scheme after she passed away in 2003 at age 73. He managed to conceal the death by falsifying her death certificate, and then collected $52,000 from her $700-a-month Social Security checks over the next six years. He is being held on 1 million dollars bail. 7:31 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Jim used to be a gym teacher, but wants to get a patent on an idea he has. First do research to make sure that it’s truly unique. Danny created a piece of workout gear that allowed moms to workout with their babies, but there were already 10 versions of it were patented. There are two ways to go, pay up front and get a patent lawyer or go through a service that looks to get paid when the product is marketed.
Rusty runs a financial planning firm with his friend, but he’s not getting ahead like he thinks he should. His partner has incredible expenses which bog everything down. The illusion of prospering is very expensive. It instills confidence in the consumer, but don’t go into the red to put forth an image that isn’t needed to be successful.
Jay was abused by his stepfather when he was young. He used to pull Jay’s toenails out with pliers and stuff like that. The stepfather finally got locked up when Jay was 18 and sat in prison for years. Jay got a lawyer, sued and won a settlement of $350,000. However he hasn’t been able to collect on the judgment. Get a paralegal to file a motion which will result in a bench warrant and jail for the stepfather. That should lead to payment.
7:50 – Spike is in the studio to talk tattoos with Danny. He has a tattoo location chart that tell you about the tattoos you have. Bill has a tattoo on his neck that can’t be hidden by a collar. That means that he’ll never have a job that involves paying taxes or he’ll be in the NBA. Hand ink will cost everyone else tax money from all the jail visits. Shila wants to get a small tattoo on her hip line. That screams DANGER on the chart; it will be humiliating in five years. Babies and weight gain will not be easy on the eye as the body changes. Sam has a tattoo on his forearm. Easily hidden with a long sleeve shirt, but according to the chart it falls in the ‘job that doesn’t involve taxes’ category. Maryann has a rose on her hip and wants to know what it means. It means she’s confident to have a rose so close to her genitals. The tramp stamp indicates that buying three drinks will totally work. Danny’s surprised he doesn’t have a tramp stamp after some of his drunken nights. Never trust Asian characters, barbed wire, band names or logos, sports teams, video games, and the bar code are all no-no’s on the list. Danny wants to get six pack abs tattoos on his belly so he doesn’t have to do sit ups all the time.
8:10 – Entertainment News: Billy Joel has split up with wife number three. The Piano Man and Katie Lee are done after nearly five years of marriage. There have been rumors that things were not good at the Joel house, and that Katie has been spending lots of time with Israeli-born fashion designer, whose 36, Katie is 27. Billy is 60. Billy reportedly has a pre-nup agreement so he won't lose all his money in the divorce. At the end of the day Billy Joel is old and ugly and she’s young. This comes as no surprise. Danny’s put together a ‘pool boy’ account to take care of Amy so she can have fun with a younger man after he dies.
That film about Joan Jett's first band, The Runaways is starting to come together. "Twlight" star Kristen Stewart is practicing her portrayal of Joan by hanging out with the rock icon. This week, the two spent time in a Los Angeles recording studio working on Kristen's guitar and vocal technique. And. Kristen had her hair cut to look like Joan's classic 1970's black mullet. Dakota Fanning has been cast in the movie as Runaways' lead singer Cherie Currie. Will the film include a young Danny, who has a sexual history with some of the Runaways? Joan Jett will eventually switch teams in the movie, as she did in real life.
American Idol judge Simon Cowell is close to a deal to remake the John Travolta classic Saturday Night Fever. And, the word on the street is Simon wants Zac Efron to play the Travolta role, with Timbaland reworking the film's classic Bee Gees soundtrack. Disco is DEAD! Musicals are big at the moment, but there’s no real dance movement going on now.
Paul McCartney wants you to give up meat on Mondays, and not just for your health. The ex-Beatle, his daughters Stella and Mary along with Yoko Ono walked the green carpet recently in London's St. James Park in support of the campaign which says that eating less beef and pork can cut down on greenhouse gas emissions. Sir Paul posted on the campaign's official Web site, "Having one designated meat-free day a week is actually a meaningful change that everyone can make. Paul can eat Danny. He’ll be having a steak on meat-free Monday. 8:30 – Who Would Win In A Fight: Al Bundy or Homer Simpson?
Metro takes Homer because of his pain tolerance, he works with nuclear waste, and Al Bundy always has one hands down his pants. Shila takes Homer too. They’re similar, but Homer has undying loyalty, he’s a loose cannon that chokes his son, Al’s stamina is shot from a lack of sex with Peg. Danny takes Al because Homer is satisfied with life and Al has nothing to live for and nothing to lose.
Shane takes Al Bundy because he scored four touchdowns at a Polk High football game. John takes Al because donuts and the stink finger would render Homer useless. Frank takes Al because he’s got nothing to lose. Cindy takes Al because her grandkids like the Simpsons. Alan takes Al because at the nudie bar ‘the beer fills the glass and the Bundies kick ass.’ Jenny takes Homer. Brady takes Homer because he’s too dumb to get knocked out. Gary goes with Al because he’s kicked all of Kelly’s boyfriends out of the house.
8:49 – Enzo goes with Al because he beat Kelly’s boyfriend up at a movie theater once. Tim takes Al too. Angry Army guy calls to take Al for all the reasons Danny listed. Dan takes Homer because he can take a 2x4 to the head and keep movin’. Bundy can’t do that. Bundy destroyed Homer on the phones and on the text votes. Bundy wins!
9:05 – Brian calls to ask Danny about fashion. Brian buys flashy clothes that come across as being gay when going out. Danny does think about how elaborate his clothes are, but he likes all the pieces of his wardrobe, but certain combinations just go over the top. The outfit has to match the social occasion he’s attending. The clothes are too gay if you feel awkward. Matt calls to say that the Rattlesnake Roundup is this weekend. Shila’s excited! She just might go. Danny and Amy got into an argument about piranhas. She thinks they’re ferocious. Danny thinks that he could reach his bare hand into a fish tank and no get bitten. Maybe Danny could try this on the air. Joe Calls to say that the fish wouldn’t be likely to attack. Theresa calls to say she has red belly piranhas, they eat goldfish. Danny asks to put his hand in her fish tank. She’s more than willing. Coming soon: The Stumpy Bonaduce Show!
9:26 – Some cavewomen fro Year One are in the studio now. Victoria is the one that speaks English. They have forbidden fruits for Danny. They also have inflatable clubs and a cute cavegirl that doesn’t speak. Hot.
Year One opens up this weekend. In year 1, Zed (Jack Black) and his friend, Oh (Michael Cera), are two inept cavemen just trying to survive. Zed is a lazy hunter with no skills, and Oh is a gatherer of nuts and berries. Zed is banished from the village after he eats the forbidden fruit. Oh decides to go with Zed on his epic journey to the end of the earth. Instead, they both find a new world outside of their prehistoric village. They soon find themselves wandering in Biblical times in Bible country.
9:33 – News with Shila: A Rock & Roll After School has opened in Phoenixville. It's a music school and a recreational facility. It has a professional stage, DJ booth and sound proof rooms for private instruction. Organizers say the band program offers the best incentive for learning. After refinancing her home, President Erin Riley, put her own equity on the line to open the facility. She says it was her teenage son who inspired her to take on the project. Open to students ages eight to eighteen, 'Rock & Roll After School' costs $195 for basic enrollment, which includes one forty-five minute private lesson and access to the facility during operation.
An Oregon woman nicknamed the "Bunny Lady" is back in the hutch after violating a court order banning her from owning animals for five years. Miriam Sakewitz, 47, was arrested Tuesday at a hotel after an employee reported finding rabbits hopping around in her room. Problems for Miriam started in October 2006 when police found and confiscated nearly 250 rabbits in her home, including about 100 dead ones in freezers and refrigerators. Miriam was sentenced to five years probation and was banned from owning or controlling animals. She also was told not to go within 100 yards of a rabbit. On Tuesday, animal control officers removed eight adult rabbits, five young ones and a dead one from her hotel room. Danny was dating a girl from a band and asked about her hobbies. She showed him all of her dead pets in the freezer. So Danny spent the night with her and split.
9:53 –Danny once lost a girlfriend to one of the guys in Cinderella. Spike’s a big Cinderella fan. He prefers them over Bon Jovi. Spike thinks that Jon Bon Jovi’s jeans are too tight and he looks like a housewife. Spike just volunteered Gordon for a shirtless bitch ride on someone’s motorcycle this Saturday in the Ride for Dime.
10:01 – Danny’s Final Thought: “I’m one of those losers that once they say it, has to do it. So, get ready for the Lefty Bonaduce Show!”
6:01 – Danny has a sore throat and a cough, but doesn’t feel sick. Shila’s glands are swollen too. She thinks that people aren’t feeling well because of the weather. Danny refuses to admit defeat to humidity. Danny digs being on the east coast and the changes in weather. The opportunity of sunny days make him want to seize the moment. Metro spent some time in the 2009 Ford Mustang that the station is giving away for Live In It And Win. He thinks that back seat could be a deal breaker for one of the four people competing for the car. Danny’s efforts to have a naked weather chick added to the show have gone unrealized. He got lots of high fives from other guys, but no women have applied yet. There were no beauty requirements, just a woman to come in the studio to read the weather without clothes and maybe giggle at Danny’s jokes sometimes. He was deflated. Maybe just needs to mention it a few more times. 6:37 – SPORTS: The Phillies squandered second chances in an 8-3 loss in 10 innings to the Blue Jays. Not only did Ryan Madson's get his first blown save of the season, but Scott Rolen drove the go-ahead run.
Sammy Sosa tested positive for a performance-enhancing drug in 2003, The New York Times reported Tuesday on its Web site, the latest in a string of baseball stars implicated in the sport's steroids scandal of the past decade. The Times said Sosa is one of 104 players who tested positive in baseball's anonymous 2003 survey, which has been the subject of a protracted court fight. The paper did not identify the drug. Not so anonymous, huh? Danny is banned from professional tiddlywinks.
Former Eagles wide receiver Donte' Stallworth took full responsibility for killing a pedestrian while driving drunk in Florida and began serving a 30-day jail sentence Tuesday after he pleaded guilty to DUI manslaughter. Stallworth also reached a confidential financial settlement to avoid a potential lawsuit from the family of 59-year-old Mario Reyes, according to Stallworth's attorney, Christopher Lyons. Reyes was struck and killed March 14 by Stallworth, who was driving his black 2005 Bentley after a night drinking at a swanky hotel bar. 30 days for killing a guy? Someone’s getting off easy. Danny would love to kill someone and just get 30 days in jail for it.
6:53 – Who would Danny kill if he could get away with it? There is one person that Danny would love to terminate, however he’s shy about naming names just in case the guy ever ends up with a bullet in his head. He hates the guy though. For this particular person he wouldn’t shy away from the stigma of being a killer. Phil calls to say that he did kill someone that hurt him when he was younger and did 20 years for it. Nathan. Mike calls to say that he could live with the guilt. Tom would do up to a year, he’s got one guy in mind.
7:07 – News with Shila: The first arrest has been made in connection with the shooting of Officer Hoggard. Officer Ashley Hoggard was shot in the shoulder while responding to reports of gunfire outside a bar in North Philadelphia early Sunday morning. Police have arrested 28-year-old Lawrence Peel. Peel is facing weapons and assaults charges after police said he pointed a silver handgun at his ex-girlfriend and threatened her. Peel then allegedly punched the woman in the face and fractured her nose. Peel, who is not charged with shooting Officer Hoggard, is considered a person of interest and investigators are attempting to determine if he pulled the trigger. Peel is also a convicted drug dealer and has a long rap sheet.
A 5-foot long alligator and several piranhas were confiscated from a home in South Philadelphia Tuesday by SPCA. Officials said that any type of exotic wildlife that’s living in an urban environment is not right for the animal or safe for the public. Exterminator Mike McClay is the owner of the alligator named Kirt and found it in a house in West Philadelphia about three and a half years ago. After the zoo and several pet shops didn’t want the animal he just got a little pond and threw it in his basement. SPCA officers also said owning the piranhas in the city are illegal. The piranhas should be worried about the people in South Philly, not the other way around. What harm could a piranha doing in a fish tank, but the alligator is a different deal. Danny did wrestle an alligator while on vacation once. The fight didn't last long, but at some point he had to let go. Just another drunk tourist at Club Med.
An Ohio teenager who shot and killed his mother and wounded his father after they took away his video game learned his fate. A James Daniel Petric, 17, was sentenced to life in prison with the eligibility of parole in 23 years. Prosecutors had asked for the maximum penalty of life in prison without parole. Daniel’s addiction to video games lasted 18 hours a day sometimes with no sleep or food. Judge Burge addressed the issue of video game addiction during sentencing, and said that it was a factor in his final decision. He says he hopes more study will be done on the topic. Danny's fiancée Amy might end up with a Guitar Hero controller in her skull. She admitted to Danny that she was practicing Dance Dance Revolution yesterday, which is something he considers practice' in their DDR competition. It upset him.
White house employee said that President Barack Obama is extending benefits to same-sex partners of federal employees. Obama plans to announce his decision today in the Oval Office and more details will be released. The official spoke on the condition of anonymity because the president hadn't yet signed the presidential memorandum. And another big moment for president Obama…he killed a fly during an interview on CNBC. After he killed it he said, “That was pretty impressive, wasn't it? I got the sucker."He can't catch it with chop stick like Mr. Miagi though!
Four women trying to skip out on their bill at an IHOP in Detroit just after 6am. Their server chased them out the door. But one of the women lost control of her car as they drove away, crashing through the restaurant's wall and smashing at least one large window. The driver was ticketed at the scene. The driver's father told The Detroit News his daughter had more than $200 in cash on her at the time and was talked into dining and dashing by friends. Danny has dined and dashed numerous times. It always turned into three kids and Danny Partridge that skipped out on the bill. She was waffling on paying and when she crashed her car she yelled ‘oh crepe!’ 7:30 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Michelle’s husband didn’t finish high school and is having a tough time finding work now. Why is Michelle calling Danny and not her husband? He needs to step up. If she’s doing all the work it’s something future employers can sniff out.
Joey is married with lots of kids, a car payment, and a mortgage. When he’s tolerant with the kids they walk all over him. When he tries to lay down the law they don’t obey him. He’s a recovering addict and in arguments they always play that card. The answer is the show them he’s clean with at-home drug tests and assert the respect he deserves. When the rest of the family doesn’t want Joey around they’ll let him know.
Bob’s been with a woman for 27 years and he’s worried that their sex life is dead. He needs to explain the situation to her. The withholding of wifely duties can be grounds for divorce. He’s obviously still in love and attracted to her, but if he’s unhappy on any level he needs to move on. Having an affair could be alright with her too. Just get permission first.
7:48 – A man has been charged with involuntary manslaughter after backing out of suicide pact when the other man killed himself. First off never confess if you’re getting away with something. Under Missouri law, the charge of voluntary manslaughter applies to someone who "knowingly assists another in the commission of self murder." Danny thinks that after seeing his friend kill himself the kid backed out because it was so gruesome. Why should he serve time for coming to his senses. Mike calls to ask how anyone could know what really happened leading up to the suicide. The only witness to offer a different account is dead now.
8:10 – Entertainment News: Eddie Van Halen is suing Nike. He claims Nike's new Dunk Low sneakers stole his black, red and white streak pattern used on his instruments since 1978 and trademarked in 2001. The lawsuit says Nike never asked Eddie's permission to use the design and that they have caused (quote), "irreperable harm and damage" to that design. He also wants all of the Dunk Low sneakers destroyed and profits made to date from sales of the sneakers. Eddie already has a sneaker line with Converse. The Frankenstein guitar is legendary! Nike owns Converse, but the suit could still move forward despite that. This is Eddie’s intellectual property and has the right to defend it. Brown M&M’s couldn’t hold Van Halen back and neither can Nike!
Sarah Palin has accepted David Letterman's apology regarding a crack he made about her 14-year-old daughter Willow. The Alaska Governor released a statement saying that she accepted it, "on behalf of all young women, like my daughters, who hope men who 'joke' about public displays of sexual exploitation of girls will soon evolve." But even though she was upset at the joke, Palin acknowledged that Letterman had the right to say it. She explained, "Letterman certainly has the right to 'joke' about whatever he wants to, and thankfully we have the right to express our reaction." Danny would rather spend the night with a polar bear than Sarah Palin.
In the July/August issue of Playboy, 30 Rock star Alec Baldwin says he thought about suicide after an angry voicemail to his daughter Ireland was leaked to the press. Baldwin said his thoughts of killing himself became "very serious," adding, "I spoke to a lot of professionals, who helped me. If I committed suicide, they [Kim Basinger's team] would have considered that a victory." He decided to use the incident as a platform to help struggling dads and wrote the book A Promise to Ourselves, a guide for divorced fathers trying to remain in their kids' lives. Most men that go for custody of their children in a divorce do it to hurt the soon to be ex-wife. Danny prefers shared custody, or Chered custody. Cher can watch your kids as hers gets a sex change. 8:28 – Guess Who Tweeted!
This just in from the water cooler. We need more water!
A. Phil Donahue
B. Larry King*
C. Dan Rather
Does your passion for caring extend to your own backyard, or is it more important abroad?
A. Demi Moore*
B. Cameron Diaz
C. Drew Barrymore
Holy! S***! Sims-SModcast! Future-Scott battles the Sasquatches, from SMod 77: Nipple Rot. An instant classic!
A. Jason Mewes
B. Ben Affleck
C. Kevin Smith*
8:47 – Shila has friends that have had their drinks spiked and watched them get strung out on roofies. Danny brings up and article that states that’s a rarity because it’s perception that drink spiking is to blame, when it’s really binge drinking. This means that 9 out of 10 women could be ruing a man’s life for something he didn’t do.
Drink spiking is largely a myth and far more likely to be an excuse young women use after they become heavily intoxicated, according to WA research.
A Perth study of suspected drink spiking victims found claims of being given sedatives or illicit drugs without consent are exaggerated and that alcohol is often the real culprit.
The results, published in the journal of the Australasian College for Emergency Medicine, are based on 100 patients who attended Sir Charles Gairdner Hospital and Joondalup Health Campus over 19 months with suspected drink spiking from the previous 12 hours.
Almost nine out of 10 cases were women and almost 60 per cent of those were under the age of 25.
Danny’s been paranoid about women giving themselves roofies to perpetuate a lawsuit. It’s every guy’s nightmare to be accused of something he didn’t do that can ruin his reputation. Some women still believed that their drinks were spiked despite medical proof they weren’t.
Mike was at a bar with some friends when a friend of his was roofied. They took her to the hospital because they could tell something was wrong. Shila’s rule for her friends is to not have sex with a woman that is visibly intoxicated.
9:08 – Danny is in awe of Megan Fox’s camel toe pictures. He’s a fan of her looks, but not of the words that come out of her mouth. Danny’s had lots of fun with drunken slobs, but they’re only useful for one night. Camel toes are great, unless the girl is big or it’s your girlfriend/wife/mother. Danny thinks that this camel toe is on purpose. Danny and Shila dislike Megan Fox’s camel toe.
9:35 – News with Shila: Police are examining a cab that may have been involved in a hit and run crash in South Philadelphia early Tuesday morning. A 29-year-old bicyclist was riding in the rain with a dog on her lap when she was struck by a black and white taxi near Broad and Federal Streets at about 2:30 a.m. The female biker was taken to Jefferson University Hospital, where she was treated and released for minor injuries. Investigators located an Olde City Taxi cab matching the vehicle's description in the 4500 block of Magee Avenue in Mayfair at about 11 a.m. No major damage could be seen, but the vehicle was towed from the scene for further examination. It was tacked down by a GPS unit inside the cab. Danny used to carry cowboy boots in his bicycle saddle bags so he be stylish and add some height at the office, but no lap dogs.
The FDA warned that Zicam Cold Remedy nasal gel and related products can permanently damage the sense of smell. Federal health regulators ordered that all Zicam products be pulled from the shelves and advised people to stop using them. The over-the-counter products contain zinc, an ingredient scientists say may damage nerves in the nose needed for smell. 130 consumers have reported a loss of smell after using Zicam products since 1999. Zicam Cold Remedy has never been formally approved by the FDA because it belongs to homeopathic products, and often contains herbs, minerals and flowers. Smelling is overrated, have you inhaled in Old City lately?
In Maine, Graduate Justin Denney went to receive his high school diploma. When he got on stage he bowed and then blew his Mom a kiss. Immediately afterward the Principal told Denney that there was “no fooling around” and then asked him why he thought he deserved his diploma. His reply was, “Because I worked hard and I earned it.” She told him “no” and that he needed to go sit down. Justin was one of several students who was not allowed to receive their diploma at Bonny Eagle High School’s graduation Friday night because, according to the school district, they failed to adhere to the rules of graduation including “no misbehavior” during the ceremonies. The expectations in the agreement were that the school could withhold a students’ diploma for ‘misbehavior’. "There was no misbehavior. Showboating is not misbehavior," Justin’s Mom said. "A bow, a kiss to your mom is not misbehavior. There was no need for my son not getting his diploma." Shila wasn’t allowed to throw her cap in the air at her graduation, so they batted around beach balls. That’s fun…not.
The nation's newest texting champion has a message for parents across the land — "Let your kid text during dinner! Let your kid text during school! It pays off." This is according to 15-year-old Kate Moore who won the LG U.S. National Texting Championship. The Des Moines, Iowa, teenager won $50,000. Moore beat out 20 other finalists from around the country, while doing challenges such as texting blindfolded and texting while going through a moving obstacle course. In the final showdown, she outtexted a 14-year-old. Both girls had to text three lengthy phrases without making any mistakes on the required abbreviations, capitalization or punctuation. Soon texting will be an Olympic sport.
Kimberley Vlaminck, an 18-year-old Belgian woman, is suing a tattoo artist after she allegedly asked for three star tattoos on her face but instead received 56. Kimberly claims she fell asleep while being tattooed and awoke to a “nightmare.” She says, “It is terrible for me. I cannot go out on to the street, I am so embarrassed. I just look horrible. I think he didn’t understand what I wanted. He spoke only fractured English and French. But I explicitly said in my native tongue, French, and also in a little bit of English when he looked confused, that I wanted three little stars only near my left eye.” The tattoo artist, Rouslan Toumaniantz, claims that Vlaminck “asked for 56 stars”. He says the 18-year-old changed her story when she went home and “her father and boyfriend threw a fit.” Danny had a few tattoos removed, it hurt much more than the tattoo. It took over a year to get rid of it completely and it’s the blisters from the treatment that draw the ink out. That’s not going to be fun to get rid of.
9:57 – Spike is in the studio, Danny asks if he has any tattoos he regrets. Spike says no, not even the Hello Kitty! tattoo. On tomorrow’s show Danny will go through what your tattoos and where they are on your body says about you. Danny’s up to nine names inked on his flesh.
10:01 – Danny’s Final Thought: The only tattoo I’ve ever had on my body that I’ve ever regretted was that little French dude from Fantasy Island that said ‘The plane! The plane!’ Now that little guy’s dead. That’ll teach him won’t it?
6:02 – Danny has pinstriped pants on today. Danny was going to suit today, he normally dresses for fun. However it is nice to wear a suit and not be referred to as ‘the defendant.’ While singing the Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach song in the shower he somehow morphed the words into ‘Danny Bonaduce: Cockroach.’ That could lead to a segment about all the awful things Danny and the audience have done. Danny’s move to Philly came quickly so he doesn’t have a suit or his books in town. Danny found episodes of Gretchen’s television show online and was surprised how mean the comments were on the site. This made Danny smile. Danny is still baffled why Gretchen’s married boyfriend isn’t in a hurry to get a divorce and marry Gretchen. His divorce has been lingering for three years, maybe Kevin and Gretchen can get married in the season finale of the next season. That would get Danny off the alimony hook!
6:31 – Danny was shocked to learn that his old friend David Cassidy has a hot daughter Katie Cassidy. She’s going to be in the new Melrose Place series. For all the stuff that people were on in the 70’s girls like Liv Tyler, Angelina Jolie, and Katie Cassidy should have fists growing out of their foreheads. 6:36 – SPORTS: A limited number of single-game tickets to all the Eagles' 2009 home games will go on sale at 10 a.m. today through Ticketmaster. Fans may purchase tickets to regular and preseason games through Ticketmaster online at Ticketmaster.com or Charge-By-Phone (800-745-3000). Single-game tickets cost between $70 and $95, plus tax and convenience charges. There will be a limit of four tickets per person. Tickets will not be sold at the Lincoln Financial Field ticket office. In past years, single-game tickets for the entire season have sold out within hours, so fans are encouraged to purchase their tickets early.
6:51 – Danny is pleased to learn that Indian prostitutes are practicing karate to protect themselves from local thugs. They’re getting bullied by the local police, the clients, and just about everyone else. Danny’s karate lesson? A strike to the groin and run in the other
direction. No man can chase a woman down the street after a kick to the nards.
7:08 – News with Shila:
The Fire Commissioner confirmed that the bar outside that Officer Ashley Hoggard was shot over the weekend is owned by firefighter Eugene Coulter, a 3 year veteran of the department. Coulter wasn't at the bar during the shooting but police have witnessed a very troubling scene through surveillance cameras. From what police have seen through the captured video is people in the bar on the dance floor with guns. Minutes later, one guy is shot multiple times outside of the bar. The gunman reportedly hands off the 9mm to a second suspect who passes it to a third person when Officer Hoggard enters the scene. Then he is seen on the sidewalk collapsed. As Hoggard lay on the sidewalk bleeding from a gun shot wound, someone pulls a trash bag from near the bar and begins handing out handguns and people are fleeing out of all exits of the bar. Franchise Sports Bar on North Broad has been cited for nuisance, fire code and other violations. 4 people, including the officer were all rushed to the hospital and are in stable condition. If you’re a firefighter and you’re constantly fined for violating fire code then your boss has to hate you. Colt 45 must have been the happy hour special.
Rescue crews were able to save a worker in Merchantville, New Jersey Monday morning after he was shocked by a power line. The worker, Tim Williams who is also the father of 8 was trimming trees on Chapel Avenue when he was injured around 10:30 a.m. According to reports, a large rope knocked down an electrical wire, sending a current through the branch Williams was trimming. He then screamed and collapsed. It took nearly 40 minutes for the power lines to become de-energized, so the paramedics could bring him down. The current reportedly went through his body, but did not hit any vital organs. He is a very lucky man in stable condition. Danny wants to see the exit wounds of the electrocution. Danny was working on the air in Phoenix and was electrocuted when he was wet and stepped on a frayed electrical cord. Both of his feet have bright red circles on the top of his feet.
Bothered that an ambulance driver failed to yield to a trooper and flip him an obscene gesture, state Trooper Daniel Martin decided to stop the ambulance and give the driver a piece of his mind. However, the Trooper's lawyer said that he didn't know that there was a patient in the back. A Cell phone video taken by the patient's son which is in dispute was released last month. Martin has faced criticism and has been placed on paid leave pending an investigation. The patient, Stella Davis, was treated and released. In a longer video taken, authorities said after the trooper pulled him over, a paramedic jumped from the back and demanded that Martin talk to him instead of the driver. The paramedic continued to say that he had a patient he was taking to the hospital. It also shows the incident escalating by the Trooper attempting to arrest the paramedic by grabbing him by the throat. The trooper claims he was trying to make a legitimate traffic stop. Obviously the trooper didn’t learn a lesson from the Ryan Moats incident. There rules about to proper use of sirens and lights. 7:33 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Mike calls to ask Danny how he got over obsessing about the sexual past of women he loves. Danny imagines that the other guys look like nerdy scientists. Danny was happiest when he lived with women he wasn’t in love with. They were exclusive, but the jealousy wasn’t an issue. Danny has gotten turned on by having the women he was having sex with tell him sexual stories while they were doing it. It’s fun in the moment, but after the sex the story stays with you.
Jolie’s friend just got out of a massively destructive relationship. After helping the friend through a big breakdown Jolie doesn’t like the way she’s being treated. Why is that? The ex-boyfriend still drives her crazy and she has to be mean to someone. All men are pigs, women need to know that. Tell her to go get laid by another man and that will help ease the pain.
7:51 – Gibbons comes in the studio to tell a story about a fun night at the shore. He went down the shore to hang out with a girl at her shore house. They went skinny dipping. He knew he was in when the clothes came off. She wanted to have sex in the water, but Gibbons didn’t want to do it while people outside might watch. Then she got out of the water and passed out. Danny looks at the gray area and thinks that Gibbons could still do it while the girl is passed out. Gibbons thought about it, but didn’t want to get in trouble with surprise sex. Shila and Metro think that’s treading in dangerous territory. A lawyer calls to say that once the woman loses consciousness because she can no long give consent. I there was a verbal contract in place it would be useless because she can’t verbally comply or deny. Gibbons is almost a man, but not a felon.
8:09 – Entertainment News:
Nine Inch Nails frontman Trent Reznor said their performance Sunday at the Bonnaroo Music Festival was their last in the country. Nine Inch Nails just completed a U.S. tour with Jane's Addiction. Their summer tour continues in Europe and Asia. The tour, dubbed "Wave Goodbye," was conceived as a farewell tour to mark the 20th anniversary of their first album, "Pretty Hate Machine."
Trying to put an end to the controversy that erupted last week when he made a joke about Sarah Palin's daughter, talk show host David Letterman apologized to Alaska's governor on yesterday's Late Show. A website called FireDavidLetterman.com is organizing a rally outside Letterman's show at the Ed Sullivan theater for today at 4:30 p.m. Danny got a call from CNN to offer his opinion on the subject. He was in New York and available to go on camera for them, but the great minds at CNN couldn’t comprehend that. Danny thinks that any apology in unnecessary. Letterman isn’t Danny’s favorite, but he thinks the Palins are idiots.
Megan Fox is single again. At the UK premiere of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, the actress told The Sun that she and fiancé Brian Austin Green have called it quits. "I'm currently what you call single I guess," she told a reporter. When asked if she has her eye on any new men, she revealed, "Oh I don't know. There is this Korean Justin Timberlake named Rain and I'm really on his situation right now. I'm trying to fix this up. I'm working hard." Megan Fox used to be special to Danny. She runs her mouth and she’s on her way to being the next Lindsay Lohan.
Michael Jackson needs to get in shape for his shows in London this summer and he's turned to his good friend Lou Ferrigno for help. According to The Sun, the former Incredible Hulk star has been making secret visits to the King of Pop's Los Angeles mansion, although how he's actually helping remains to be seen. Sources say Michael is simply too frail to complete a grueling workout and flat out refuses to lift weights. Sources also claim the singer is battling skin cancer and is worried that putting on weight could affect his chances at beating the disease. Michael’s got the most annoying voice and Lou can’t hear him. Match made in heaven.
8:33 – Men’s Health put out a list of the Biggest Worries on a Guy’s Mind.
1. Hair loss. Danny’s never worried about it because of his family’s hair heritage. His son Dante might not be so lucky. 2. Being broke. Danny worries about it constantly. The responsibilities of children and a fiancée keep him working hard. 3. Getting fight. Danny does something about this. He was chubby as a kid. It was a shock to Danny to learn that he was fat at 10 years old. 4. Being called out in public. Danny lives for this. It’s what keeps on his toes and why he’s on the air in Philadelphia. He loves confrontation. 5. Your kid won’t be a good athlete. If Danny’s son makes a game winning free throw then he’d question the genetics. Danny doesn’t come from an athletic family. Not every kid is going to make it in the NBA. 6. Failure in bed. YES! Danny’s only had one issue with this. When he was 19 he was going to have sex with a hot chick and things weren’t working like he wanted, so rather than admit defeat he walked into a glass coffee table, shattering it. The diversion worked and she didn’t know that he had blood flow issues.
8:52 – Danny calls up the second Live In It and Win contestant, John, to tell him that he’ll be one of the four people trying to with the 2009 Ford Mustang. John’s mother sold his truck when he was in the Army, but he’s back home now after being discharged for his ADHD. Now that he’s out of the Army he wants to chase his dreams to play big league baseball. He needs arm surgery though. John’s willing to live in the car for months if he has to. Being locked in a Ford with a guy who has ADHD is going to be it’s own special brand of torture.
9:04 –Viewer Mail:
Dave writes to say that Danny sucks, Metro is gay, and Shila can’t read. Danny has a bone to pick with this one. Shila reads a lot of news stories on the air; Metro has a girlfriend, and agrees that he sucks…when he takes a puff on his cigarettes.
John wrote to say thank you to Danny for help calming his daughter’s fear of flying on a plane back to Philadelphia. Now Danny’s her plane buddy.
Jeff writes to ask if Amy ever nailed Mickey Rourke. Things progressed well, but once they all met it was too weird and they all agreed that it was a fantasy better left unrealized.
E writes to say that he thought that Danny was annoying, but has come around to like the show a lot.
Sean wrote to ask where all the naked chicks are. Danny is not accepting applications for women volunteering to be the Naked Weather Chick.
Ginger writes to suggest that Danny introduce Arthur Kade to Gretchen. Danny’s not that cruel.
9:34 - News with Shila:
Police are searching for a driver who dragged a pit bull/mutt mix through a Cumberland County neighborhood over the weekend. The dog was tied to the bumper of a car with a pink jump rope for two blocks through Vineland late Saturday night. It was then found on the front porch of a Vineland home Sunday morning with road burns to the right side of her body and severe injuries to her face and feet. The dog was taken to the SPCA and workers say she remains friendly despite the her injuries. She is expected to make a full recovery and become adoptable. Danny’s hoping that this is an accident. When someone picks on an animal it makes him lose faith in humanity.
The body of an 8-year-old boy was found with his head pinned in a church elevator as his family was cleaning up after his grandmother's wedding reception, authorities said Monday. No foul play is suspected in the death. The church's pastor found the boy's body in the doorway at the lower level of the shaft connecting the church's first and second floors. County Coroner said the boy died as a result of compression asphyxia, meaning he couldn't breathe after the elevator came down on him. The rev said it was the worst thing he ever experienced. The family is devastated. Because this happened in a church is it God’s will?
Authorities said a man faces a felony charge after allegedly spitting on a police officer's McDonald's breakfast sandwich. Police said a 32-year-old man was working the drive-thru window at the southwest Michigan restaurant when an unidentified officer bit into an Egg McMuffin on June 3 and immediately realized something was wrong. The restaurant's assistant manager noted the sandwich contained a "stringy with mucus" substance. The suspect, a parolee who spent 14 years in an Indiana prison, said he has nothing against police. He's being held in the Berrien County Jail on a $10,000 bond. Danny’s always polite at fast food restaurants so this kind of thing doesn’t happen to him.
A new study from the University of Michigan has found that when young men live in areas where they're outnumbered by young women . . . they're LESS likely to settle down and get married. So that begs the question: Where exactly do women outnumber men? Danny’s raised his three drink minimum to a four drink minimum. He commented that he’d like a lady on each of the four floors of their house. That got him a smack to the brain stem.
8. New York, New York
7. Baltimore, Maryland
6. Washington, D.C.
5. Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
4. Richmond, Virginia
3. New Orleans, Louisiana
2. Memphis, Tennessee
1. Birmingham, Alabama
9:58 – Spike’s back problems will prevent him from playing paintball this weekend. He’s herniated some discs over the years, but it’s not bad enough to warrant surgery. Danny thinks Spike should get Vicodin and he’ll hold onto the pills for him.
10:02 – Danny’s Final Thought: In Philadelphia there’s three women for every single man. Which leads me to believe that if you don’t have three girlfriends, you’re not trying hard enough.
6:01 – Shila is fired up after an early morning argument with Josh the Phone Screener debating Kobe vs. LeBron. Josh’s top speed is 2 mph. Danny got in a good workout while Shila was screaming at Josh. While walking to work Danny got into a conversation with a guy on the street that was insistent that Danny doesn’t live in Philly, which infuriated him. Danny still wants to have one professionally sanctioned fight. He first planned to do this on his 40th birthday, but a broken finger stopped him. Station management think Danny should move on from boxing, but it’s Danny’s hobby and he wants the challenge of a real fight in the ring. Danny was challenged to a boxing match by a journalist in Newark, NJ that’s had a history of being mean to Danny. The journalist sent Danny a photo of himself, but it turned out that it wasn’t really him. The journalist was taller than he let on and he didn’t move so well in the ring. Danny thumped the guy good in a sparring match. Why should Danny quit his hobby?
6:23 – Brady calls to say that her hobby is listening to Danny in the morning. She gets some heat from her boyfriend about it. She was dreaming about making out with her boyfriend, who turned into Danny. Nice!
6:32 – Danny takes calls for listeners whose hobbies include backyard wrestling, riding horses, riding motorcycles, and invitation to go fishing.
6:37 – SPORTS: No Shaq, no problem for the Los Angeles Lakers, who defeated the Orlando Magic yesterday to win their first NBA championship since 2002. Kobe Bryant led the Lakers to their fifteenth title with a 99-86 win in game five of the finals as they took the best-of-seven series, 4-1.
The Pittsburgh Penguins proved their mettle in prevailing in Game 7 in Detroit over the defending Stanley Cup champion Red Wings.
6:48 – Danny has been offered Gretchen’s show. He’ll be taping a reality show here in Philly! It will be about his life on the show, his life in Philly, and goofy things that happen at his appearances. Working with cameras around all the time, they bring tension to any kind of confrontation. It won’t be the Danny from Breaking Bonaduce, but a more fun loving Danny.
7:08 – News with Shila:
A 26-year-old Philadelphia Police officer is at Temple University Hospital recovering from a gunshot wound he sustained while patrolling the streets early Sunday morning. Police say that Officer Ashley Hoggard and his partner, both of the 39th district were out patrolling the streets, when they heard gunshots. Philadelphia Police said, "They observed a male that they believe was firing a weapon, they took cover position as they seen him heading in their direction." Then, Officer Hoggard was shot once in the shoulder. He is in stable condition.
The wife of fallen Officer John Pawlowski’s has given birth to a baby boy. Kim Pawlowski named the 6 pound, 11 ounce baby boy John Palowski Jr. in memory of her husband who was shot and killed by a robbery suspect on February 13. Pawlowski's wife was four months pregnant at the time of tragic incident.
Philadelphia police have reported that a suspect wanted for multiple robberies in the Bensalem, including stealing a donation jar intended for Alex's Lemonade Stand, has died following a chase and standoff on the Platt Bridge. Early Saturday morning, police located, Michael Robert Dixon, 29, driving a stolen vehicle. Then, Dixon led police on a chase that ended with the suspect on the Platt Bridge over the Schuylkill River. After several hours of negotiations, Dixon jumped off the bridge to his death just before 9 a.m. It was not immediately known if he jumped to escape police or injure himself. If this guy stole from Alex’s Lemonade Stand and took his life, Danny’s cool with that.
A 14-year old German boy was hit in the hand by a pea-sized meteorite that scared that the hell out of him and left a scar. Gerrit Blank said, "When it hit me it knocked me flying and then was still going fast enough to bury itself into the road." Astronomers have analyzed the object and conclude it was a natural object from space. There are a handful of reports of homes and cars being struck by meteorites, but human strikes are rare. There are no known instances of humans being killed by space rocks. How badass would a meteorite scar be? That ranks right up there with a shark bite.
Last Saturday, 28-year-old Kate Taylor of Santa Rosa, California went into a store to buy beer. But while Kate was inside the store, a man stole her wallet. So Kate chased the thief out of the store, and just as he was climbing onto his bike to ride away, Kate hoisted a 12-pack of beer over her head and threw it at him. The 12-pack knocked the thief off his bike and Kate's friends held him hostage until the police showed up. Beer saves the day! 7:28 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Tim sounds like Sam Kinison and wants to break into comedy. There was one Sam Kinison, unless you offer something new you’re just a tribute act. It’s okay to pay tribute and point out the similarities, but don’t rely on it to carry you. However there could be a way to turn it into an legends act in Las Vegas.
Lisa is frustrated because a guy she knows in New York is filling up her in box with graphic texts now that she announced she’s getting married. No guy is friends with a woman for seven years unless he’s a tiger waiting to pounce like a predator anticipating the right moment to pounce.
John’s brother is on a path to self-destruction with heroin. There’s nothing John can do unless the guy wants to help himself. If an intervention doesn’t work then call the cops on him while he’s holding. Danny’s not a fan of methadone treatment. When he detoxes he’ll need help for 72 hours then the body starts to feel better.
Andrew is newly married, but can’t get past his jealousy issues. Is Andrew jealous of what might happen or what HAS happened. Danny had incredible issues with what the women in his life have done before they were with him. Andrew doesn’t have the problem because his wife was a virgin when they married. He’s worried that she’ll want to see what sex with other people is like. Danny tells him to nip it in the bud so he doesn’t punish her for something she hasn’t done.
7:49 – Last night was the season finale of Gretchen’s show Reinventing Bonaduce. It was a big ratings booster for the network it airs on. The show included the end of their big on-air fight and some off mic footage of Gretchen and Danny fighting. She’s not so good at arguing. There was an amazing moment when Kevin, Gretchen’s married boyfriend asks her to marry him. She says that she’s attracted to Kevin, but if she marries Kevin she’ll lose all her alimony. Kevin stands to get a hefty inheritance. She also says that she can’t live on the child support payments. Isn’t that money supposed to go to the KIDS? Danny calls Gretchen to express his excitement about the season finale and invites her and Kevin to stay in his guest house if they want to visit. Nice. He’s also fired up that the alimony payments could stop if she marries Kevin.
8:06 – Historic Head Injuries!
Which talk show host and report was knocked over and smashed his head on live television during a report about Hurricane Ike? Geraldo Rivera.
It was his second great head injury on the air. Getting hit in the face with a chair while filming an episode of his talk show was his first.
Apparently, Bret Michaels risks his life everyday, The Poison frontman told Elle magazine that even though he's a diabetic, and has been since childhood, he'll sometimes skip his insulin shot so he can last longer in bed. Bret admits that getting his blood sugar into the 200 range could kill him, but he'll do whatever it takes to please a woman. Danny’s all for that. He’d prefer to die just before sex rather than during or after though.
And if it wasn't Brett Michaels banging his on something this weekend, leave it to Aerosmith guitarist Brad Whitford to do so. Brad banged his head pretty hard getting out of his Ferrari last week. The band's official Web site says Brad needed surgery for internal bleeding and that's why he had to miss the opening of Aerosmith's tour in St. Louis. He'll be out until July 7th.
The Warner Bros. comedy "The Hangover" raked in $33.4 million to remain the top box-office draw for the 2nd straight weekend in a row. The movie about a Las Vegas bachelor party gone wrong raised its total to $105.4 million after 10 days in theaters. It was the summer's first movie to finish at No. 1 for two weekends in a row.
Funeral services for actor David Carradine were held Saturday in a chapel on the grounds of Forest Lawn Cemetery in Los Angeles. Hundreds of family and friends, including Darryl Hannah, Tom Selleck, Jane Seymour and Lucy Liu, gathered to say goodbye to the actor, who was found dead June 4th in a Bangkok hotel. The two-hour service featured several family and friends, including Carradine's Kill Bill co-star Michael Madsen, sharing memories with fellow mourners. "Michael shared a list of rules to live by that David had given him years ago," said Bruce. "These included advice like, 'Never marry a woman named Candy,' and 'Never buy anything from a man who is out of breath.'" That’s actually not bad advice. If Danny dies in Bangkok he’d prefer to be buried there rather than be humiliated by having a funeral after a shocking death.
Shia LaBeouf likes to shock people in interviews. The Transformers star, who once said he'd marry his mother if she weren't his mother, tells Parade magazine that he gets his comedy from "seeing my parents have sex, smoke weed, my mom being naked ... [and] twisted R-rated humor." As for his chosen profession, Shia says, "The good actors are all screwed up. They're all in pain. It's a profession of bottom-feeders and heartbroken people." One Journalist interviewed the actor for the mag and describes him as "foul-mouthed, resentful, funny, prickly, quick-witted, and charming -- a package of contradictions." Shia says that even though he's a big star he's constantly insecure, and sometimes stops his bike on the side of the road to see if people recognize him. 8:30 – The Art of Manliness: Arm Wrestling
Don’t challenge anyone to a match, but accept if you are challenged. First up don’t put your elbow down first, put your elblow up and get a good grip before putting the elbow down. You don’t win a match with your rotator cuff, you win it with the bicep and forearm. However real pros win with their wrists. Push their wrist back, power the bicep and forearm, then shift your hips slightly and use the pecs to finish it off.
When Danny was younger he and his friends would arm wrestle for punishment by putting lit cigarettes in the area their hands would land if they lost. The key to playing like that is to take a defeat fast if you know you’re going to lose. That way the cigarette doesn’t burn as much.
8:49 - Michelle is the first contestant to be announced for the 94WYSP Live In It and Win contest. She just graduated school with a degree in Elementary Education. She showed up at a video Casting Call at Whiskey Tango with a custom decorated t-shirt and a well-written poem about wanting to win the Mustang. She’s 5’4 and 120, single and ready to live in a car. Danny will announce another one of the four contestants later this morning.
9:02 – Danny brings Spike in to talk about Michael Irvin because he’s not much of sports guy. Most of the Cowboys were dumb and boring, but Irvin and Dieon Sanders ran their mouths, which made them easier to dislike. Danny was told by multiple people that he has to hate Irvin. Michael tells Danny that he doesn’t have to hate him, there’s already enough ill will in Philly. Michael’s got a new television show that gives an amateur player a chance to play for the Cowboys. Michael knows how seriously Philly takes it’s football when he was crippled on the field and fans were yelling for him to get off the field. Could he hear the fans yelling at him? No. He was thinking about his family when he was laying there and asking God for help. Michael was carjacked by a guy who turned out to be a Cowboys fan and let Michael go. Danny says that Michael is hard to hate. Spike asks if Michael will be wearing one of his loud, ugly suits. Not tonight. His show 4th and Long show airs on Spike TV tonight at 10.
9:31 – News with Shila:
A group of Boothwyn boy scouts are recovering after a Sunday morning canoeing excursion turns into a scary situation. Due to the heavy rains, the Brandywine Creek was experiencing larger than normal swells, which caused a canoe carrying several boy scouts to get trapped under over hanging trees. All 12 of the boys aboard the canoe needed to be rescued, two of whom sustained injuries that required medical attention. They were taken all taken to a local hospital. Danny wants to go kayaking, death does not scare him. The only way he’ll die is if the Crips and Bloods get into a gang war in kayaks.
An 18-year-old in South Florida was arrested Sunday for allegedly killing and mutilating dozens of neighborhood cats. Tyler Hayes Weinman was taken into custody and charged with 19 felony counts of animal cruelty and a string of other charges. Over the past month, residents in 2 Miami area neighborhoods have reported finding more than two dozen cats killed and mutilated. Some of the dead cats were missing fur and appeared to have been skinned with a sharp knife.
In Clifton Park, N.Y. 16 year old high school student, Matthew Beighey has been charged with unauthorized use of a computer and third-degree identity theft. Matthew, a computer whiz, designed software to shut teachers out of their grading system. The school district says the teenager temporarily blocked teachers' ability to enter grades at the high school in upstate New York. They needed technical support to regain access. He was ordered to return to court on Wednesday. Danny is in no danger of hacking into the Pentagon, he forgets his e-mail password all the time.
An Ohio man has been sentenced to nine years in prison for stealing underwear from more than 20 women in a series of home break-ins going back to 2006. Thomas Williams, 25, pleaded guilty Wednesday to 11 felonies, including nine burglary counts. Williams was arrested in April after police said Cleveland turned up more than 300 women's undergarments. Police said they were led to Williams because he had used Facebook to contact some victims. His lawyer said Williams is now in counseling.
9:51 – From personal experience when a guy gets comfortable and settle in with a girl, that’s when they stop waxing their upper lip and eat ice cream all day. Guys pay more compliments to other guys in the gym than women do outside the gym. Girls get jealous of a guy who looks better naked than they do.
9:56 – Danny’s Final Thought: If you want to be loved in Philadelphia break your spine and don’t dress like a pimp.
6:02 – Danny was eyeing up a hot girl in black sweatpants on the way to work until he realized it was Shila. When she saw Danny she thought he was a mugger and crossed the street. Shila turns into a terror when she gets her period. She spent all day starting fights. She cries and demands to know why people don’t love her. Last night Danny worked the phones at CBS3’s Alex’s Lemonade Stand telethon. Susan Barnett auctioned off a dinner with Danny to raise some cash for the charity. Danny might have stuck his foot in his mouth with Alex’s mother when taking a photo.
6:12 – David Cassidy is coming to Philadelphia and his relationship with Danny is strained after Breaking Bonaduce. It lead to some harsh words about each other in the press. David ‘doesn’t have time’ to come in the studio for Danny, but he’s will to make a phone call later in the summer. David took lots of credit for Danny’s sobriety, which he helped with, but not to the degree that he takes credit for. So does Danny accept the phone call or is that an insult. It could be fun to listen to if things get tense on the phone though. 6:38 – SPORTS: The Eagles announced that the final 2 years of Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb's contract have been restructured. Details were not immediately available. McNabb was scheduled to make about $9.2 million this season, $10 million next season, under terms of a deal signed in 2002, but that money was not guaranteed. It is believed that McNabb will get a raise and some guaranteed 2010 cash in the reworking.
Conventional baseball wisdom took a big blow last night in the form of a three-run home run by Raul Ibanez that lifted the Phillies to a 6-3 victory over the Mets in the 10th inning.
Former NBA referee Tim Donaghy was attacked in prison by a fellow inmate who claimed he had ties to the New York mob, a spokesman for Donaghy said Thursday. The attacker hit Donaghy in the right knee with a stick or club in November at a minimum security federal prison camp in Pensacola, said Pat Zaranek of Executive Prison Consultants.
6:52 – Revisiting a topic from yesterday, Danny brings up the Shady Lady Brothel in Nevada which is looking for male prostitutes who can make $500 to $2000 a night for whoring themselves out to the ladies. Metro would do it, Shila’s not a fan of prostitution. Danny calls up the owner’s husband, Jim. She runs the business that charges $300 for sex and everything on top of that is additional and negotiable. They have needs for all sorts of men and the women that come in to use the services range from attractive married ladies to women with warts all over their face. Could they offer a special ‘Has Been’ service for women willing to pay extra? Bill says it could be arranged!
Police say they have arrested a man who was screaming and throwing around a knife in downtown Philadelphia. Then police called in the bomb squad after finding what looked like a grenade in his bag, but it turned out that the grenade was a practice round. The man arrested near Ninth and Market streets wasn't charged with a crime. He was taken to a hospital for mental evaluation. Couldn’t someone use dirt clods to practice throwing grenades?
Congress struck the government's strongest anti-smoking blow in decades Thursday with a Senate vote to give regulators new power to limit nicotine in cigarettes and drastically limit ads. Changes could cut into the 400,000 deaths every year caused by smoking and reduce the $100 billion in annual health care costs linked to tobacco. The legislation is one of the most dramatic anti-smoking initiatives since the U.S. surgeon general's warning 45 years ago. Danny doesn’t like this. He thinks that the cigarettes should be available, but raise the price. Enforce the laws in place, but don’t mess with the strength of his cigarettes. If his Marlboro Reds turn to Marlboro Pinks he’ll start a revolution. Danny takes his right seriously. Tim calls up to say that there are smokers who still light up around kids without a second thought and put them in danger. Josh calls to ask if he’d have to smoke more cigarettes to get the same nicotine. Jim brings up that nicotine is the addictive part of the cigarette, it’s the other contents that are dangerous to health. Shila wants the government to help her quit smoking, Danny wants the freedom of choice.
All broadcast TV stations in the U.S. will be switching from analog to digital today. The switch began at 12:01 a.m. It had been delayed from February because Congress feared that many people weren't prepared.. But even though most people are now prepared, Nielsen reported that 2.8 million American households are still completely not ready for the transition. If you still need help upgrading your TV or you have questions about the availability of digital signals in your area, go to www.dtv.gov or call the government hot line on the transition at 1-888-CALLFCC (1-888-225-5322).
An American family's Christmas card photo ended up splashed across a huge billboard in the Czech Republic! The photo of Jeff and Danielle Smith and their two young children was taken last year and had been sent out to friends and family during the holidays. It was also posted on Danielle's blog and a few social networking sites. But the family still got the shock of their life when a friend of Danielle's told her he had spotted the photo in the window of a European food store while driving through Prague. Mario Bertuccio, who owns the Grazie store, said the photo was from the Internet and he had no idea it was a real family. He also said he's taking steps to remove it. Danny would be flattered if his family ended up on a billboard in the Czech Republic, but he’d want to be compensated. 7:31 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Brady’s just busted a rut and he’s been seeing two girls, but after sex he just wants to leave. The girls want to make plans while he wants to watch TV. Danny finds that the need to be alone fades and to give it a shot with one of the girls. Brady should try watching Robot Chicken with the girl after sex. Women are like Chinese food, you want more in 20 minutes.
Stacy’s long term relationship has gone sour in the bedroom. It’s her second relationship that’s been ruined by asking for sex. Having suffered from ‘It’s Still You Disease’ Danny understands that the same face every day can get redundant. Stacy suffers from the Whore/Madonna Complex. The guy needs to remember that he wanted this woman at one time. It’s not rejection, but love. Couples can have fun in bed and still run a family.
Ryan was picked up for a DUI with an opiate in his system. Why did he agree to the test? Shut up and get an attorney. He should have opted for the breathalyzer and not the blood test. The smart move would have been to fail the field sobriety test and take the hit on the DUI. Then Ryan was busted for drinking while on an opiate blocker which lead to many false negatives for pills in his system. This is a real mess. Danny tells Ryan to submit multiple blood tests to the same lab the state used and once there’s a conflicting test result bring that up in court.
7:52 – A police officer calls to clarify that if a breathalyzer is refused and the officer has reasonable suspicion that the driver is impaired and the blood draw is refused the privelge to drive is revoked because it’s implied consent when the driver gets their license. There has to be consent for a legal blood draw.
8:08 – Entertainment News: Bret Michaels isn't being shy about getting drilled in the face by a backdrop at the Tony Awards on Sunday night. He posted the pictures of his cut up nose and mouth on his Myspace page. The Poison frontman says he's "trying to remain very positive and somewhat humorous" about the mishap that left him with a broken nose and busted lip at the Tony awards Sunday night. But he expressed dismay that show organizers didn't show more concern for him at the time. The rocker released a rambling, funny statement Thursday night, saying how he was clocked in the head, how he regrets the attention it attracted and how he wishes he had made the after-parties. Michaels said he was honored to perform, and "even though I was completely out of my element I was really enjoying myself prior to my injury. Danny would rather be Fabio who took a bird to the face than Bret who took a stage prop to the face. That video will not die.
Chastity Bono daughter of Cher and the late Sonny Bono – will undergo a sex change operation to become a man. Cher is very supportive and has known about Chastity wanting to do this for a very long time. This will be a long process but it's something Chastity has wanted to do for many years. Isn't she close enough to being a guy already? Danny went to school with Chastity.
An independent autopsy conducted on David Carradine’s body has determined what many suspected. Carradine did not commit suicide. The final results of a cause of death will likely be available within a week or two. Police said they believed Carradine possibly died of accidental suffocation or heart failure. It appeared he was engaged in a dangerous form of sex play known as auto-erotic asphyxiation. Diggin up dirt on this guy is not good for his image.
Dan Gross from the Daily News reports that Jack Nicholson will be soon shooting in Philly. Jack Nicholson is referring to the a James L. Brooks Comedy," formerly called "How Do You Know," in which he's been reported to have been considering taking the role of Paul Rudd's father. The film is a love triangle between Reese Witherspoon, and Owen Wilson, a baseball player. A film spokesman says Nicholson's casting has yet to be confirmed but that the movie starts shooting here in early-mid July after they wrap in D.C. Working with Brooks has proven successful for Nicholson, who won a Best Actor Oscar for Brooks' "As Good As It Gets."
Danny Devito was drinking beer live on camera at 8am on FOX29 Wednesday and got a little naughty with reporter Jennifer Fredrick talking about her short skirt and giving birth.
8:34 - Dictation Translation for Chickenfoot tickets!
Danny’s fiancee reads popular quotes and sayings into Danny’s computer using dictation software that’s trained for his voice and often things are lost in translation.
But haven they vary = Better safe than sorry
You and I wasteland we gilded free ball = United we stand, divided we fall
8:48 – Danny is still fired up about the possibility that could give the government new power to limit nicotine in cigarettes and drastically limit ads. Danny, Shila, and Metro all smoke. Danny doesn’t want the government telling him the amount of alcohol he can have in his drinks and the amount of nicotine he can have in his cigarettes. Shila welcomes the possibility of less addictive cigarettes. The prohibition of alcohol obviously didn’t work, however cigarettes will still be available. Danny doesn’t like his freedom being tampered with. He’s fine with not smoking in bars because it affects other people, but this affects the smoker.
Steve agrees with Shila and Danny. He quit smoking, but thinks the chemical additives should be eliminated. Dave thinks that drunk drivers are more of a danger than the smokers. Danny and Shila go head to head over cancer and what causes it. Danny wants to live the way he chooses rather than how an elected official says he should live. Tim calls up to say that the black market of out of country cigarettes will be like illegal drugs. Shil thinks that smokers will go with the flow if there’s less nicotine in the cigarettes and just take what they can get. The government will have to pry the Marlboro Red from Danny’s cold, dead hand.
9:07 – A listener sent Shila a whole lotta sex lotions and love machines. Shila and Danny run through the contents of the box which include a body pen, nipple nibblers, edible massage oil candles, and some sensitivity lotion. Shila will try the sensitivity lotion to see if she notices a change in her body.
9:25 – Sookie, a listener that calls often, has brought in Bailey’s Irish Cream brownies with some highly alcoholic frosting. Danny likes. The sensitivity lotion is working on Shila.
9:33 – News with Shila:
Delaware State Police say a 15-year-old girl was stabbed several times during a fight in the parking lot of Christiana Mall. The fight involved two pairs of friends. Police say an 18-year-old and her friend were getting off the bus when her friend accidentally stepped on the foot of the victim's 14-year-old friend. Police say the four teens began to fight and the 18 year old stabbed the 15-year-old several times in her arms, face, neck and back, before jumping on a bus to escape. She was arrested minutes later and the victim was released from the hospital after being treated for her wounds. Normally the law dictates that people passing by have to help, the good Samaritan law, but Danny would give them a pass this time.
An Israeli woman mistakenly threw out a mattress she said had almost $1 million inside. The woman said that she bought her elderly mother a new mattress as a surprise present and threw out the old one. The next day, she said, she remembered that she had hidden her life savings inside the old mattress. "I woke up in the morning screaming, when it hit me what happened. She went to look for the mattress, but it had already been hauled away by garbage collectors, she said. Searches at three different landfill sites turned up nothing. The woman said the money had been stashed in a mattress because she had had "traumatic experiences with banks" in the past. Danny smells something fishy here. Mattresses aren’t easy to move and who forgets about a million dollars?
The World Health Organization declared a swine flu pandemic Thursday, as cases around the world reached nearly 30,000. It is the first global flu epidemic in 41 years. The WHO will now ask drug makers to speed up production of a swine flu vaccine, which it said would be available after September. The announcement will also urge governments to devote more money to contain the spread of the virus. Danny's been asking drug manufacturers to speed things up for years. Shila caves in and agrees with Danny that it's just another strain of the flu.
Pets make great companions, and if you really love your pet and want to keep them around even after they’re dead. You can do so. Now you can stuff there dead ashes into pillows. That's the idea that a Naples, Florida woman came up with when she missed the warm, furry presence of her dog in bed with her. Patricia Moore thought that keeping ashes in an urn was too impersonal, so she had a pillow stuffed with her dog’s remains. The ashes are in a plastic pouch in the middle so her pet will always be close. Now she's selling these for 110 bucks a pop so both pet and owner can rest in peace. Danny knows people who have done insane things to keep their pets around. Danny was going to have his deceased father suspended from the ceiling, but kids would have thought it was piñata.
9:54 – Spike is in love with the Baileys brownie. Danny’s contemplating taking drum lessons after hearing Led Zeppelin’s Moby Dick. Danny also had a great moment with Samantha Fox and a few other girls at Pulsations night club. If Rick Allen can play drums with one hand then Danny can learn to play with two hands.
10:01 – Danny’s Final Thought: If the guy from Def Leppard can do it, I can do it too.
6:01 – Danny forgot his Batter Blaster this morning and had to run home to get it before the show. So he was running down Chestnut Street in bedazzled jeans wearing an Ed Hardy watch that’s not so good at telling time. Danny’s ‘friends’ Bob (Amy) and Steve (Amy’s sister Crystal) brought Sugar Babies into the house, which is a weakness to Danny’s effort to maintain physical perfection. Much to Danny’s dismay they weren’t normal Sugar Babies, they were Sour Patch flavored Sugar Babies. Not cool. Danny moved on to Reese’s Whoppers. Another candy combination that didn’t sit well with him. The need to improve what’s already great is mind blowing. Just because it’s there it doesn’t mean that it has to be toyed with. Some times people need to know when the experiment is over. Chocolate dipped potato chips and chocolate dipped pretzels are fine. Danny’s not happy that candies from his childhood have been altered. Even though Danny didn’t like the candy, he ate it all. Bob warned Steve that would happen. Danny was mad that he could get fat from bad candy in his home and mad that he ate it all. It’s candy Armageddon!
6:37 – SPORTS: Chase Utley, leading off the 11th inning, nailed a 1-0 fastball into the seats in rightfield, where Mets fans could only watch as a5-4 Phillies victorylanded in their midst.
Raul Ibanez is bristling at the suggestion in a blog that his offensive numbers could be the result of performance-enhancing drugs. Andhe's perfectly willing to be drug tested to prove it, The Philadelphia Inquirer reported. "I'll come after people who defame or slander me," he said Tuesday night before the Phillies played the New York Mets, according to the report. "It's pathetic and disgusting. There should be some accountability for people who put that out there." Danny thinks that Raul’s body would have changed more if he were juicing. He’s just a hard worker whose efforts are paying off in a good line up. The animosity of the internet makes people real bold.
6:50 – Although the economy is in the tank, one place that’s hiring is a brothel catering to women in Nevada. The guys working charge $500 to $2000 a visit. Can’t women get it for free when they want? The catch is the prostidudes usually have to take on women that no man wants to have sex with. Morbidly obese women who don’t take care of them selves. It’s not the dream job it appears to be at first glance. What’s going on for $2000 a night??? Danny used to be charged $140-$160 by the women he visited. Danny was on vacation in England with his family when he went to a brothel where he got to pick the girl he wanted. He didn’t want to be mean to the girls he didn’t pick, but the price was more than he was used to being charged.
7:10 – News with Shila:
A car fleeing a robbery scene and being chased by police Wednesday night jumped a curb andcrashed into a crowd, killing three young children in front of their home and gravely injuring a woman, authorities said. The incident in Feltonville, began with two men stealing a motorcycle at gunpoint, One man fled on the motorcycle, and the other sped away in a car minutes later being pursued by police. The 3 children killed were all under the age of 10 and the mother of one of the children is critically injured. The driver of the getaway car was injured and arrested at the scene, and a gun was found in the car. The motorcycle rider was arrested at his nearby home, where several weapons were found. Danny will never find fault with the police, but when should a high speed chase be called off?
An 88 year old gunman opened fire in the United States Holocaust Memorial Museumin Washington yesterday, killing a security guard. The shooter is a white supremacist named James von Brunn. After shooting the guard, 39-year-old Stephen Tyrone Johns, the gunman was shot by other officers. He was listed in critical condition. The gunman was approached by security guards immediately after entering the museum's door armed with a rifle. Police say the second the gunman stepped into the building he began firing. Von Brunn has a racist, anti-Semitic Web site and in 1983, he was convicted of attempting to kidnap members of the Federal Reserve Board. How was a guy with an anti-Semitic website allowed to be so close to the museum? Danny’s not sure why Jewish people have been harassed for thousands of years. Rodney King had the right idea, can’t we all just get along?
On Friday, 50-year-old Toni Clark of Newark, New Jersey, graduated from Essex County College, which is a public, two-year school. However, the entire time she was enrolled in school, Toni was homeless. In December of 2007, Toni was laid off from her job as a certified nursing assistant and she couldn't afford to pay the rent on her apartment. So after she was evicted, Toni moved out on the streets and used her unemployment checks to cover the cost of meals and her tuition. Fortunately, Toni's finally off the streets and living with family. She hopes to get her bachelor's degree in education from a four-year school. Information technology is the way to go these days.
The prank caller caused chaos at an Arkansas Holiday Inn on Saturday when he convinced an employee to set off the hotel's fire alarm, smash windows, shut down electricity, and break a sprinkler head that flooded the building lobby. According to police, hotel employee Christina Bergmann was at the front desk when a male caller identified himself as an employee of a Fire Sprinkler service. He told her there was a problem with the hotel's sprinkler system and she needed to pull the fire alarm to reset them. Christina along with a guest at the hotel completed a number of bizarre directions from the caller, causing about $50,000 in damages. Who takes orders like that over the phone? She took the Dumb Girl test and passed.
Americans love pornography. But, this might sound strange we are the biggest sexual crazed nuts in the world. The five countries that produce the most pornography are:
5. Australia
4. The United States
3. Japan
2. South Korea
1. China
Other Cool Stats: At any given time, more than 28,000 people are looking at online pornography. Every second, $3,075.64 is spent on pornography. And overall, the pornography industry pulls in $57 billion a year worldwide. China might produce more porn, but we produce better porn. Danny’s tried hard to see porn in Asia, but it’s heavily edited. German porn is the weirdest of them all though.
7:32 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Bill’s girlfriend dumped him after calling a radio show. She got an order of protection after he yelled at him after startling him while using an electric saw. He was building her a porch while out of work as a carpenter. Anyone that calls a radio show shrink is there go make money and get ratings, they’re not there to help people. Danny tells Bill that he’s better off without the girl if she’s easily lead like that.
Bob has $30,000 of debt, but wants to save his credit rating. Be careful of debt consolidation services that gauge. Call around for the best offer, people thrive on reputation if they’re in it for the long haul.
Sue has a 21 year-old son who got drunk, took a bike out of someone’s house and called the cops on himself. He now has 5 charges pending. This is his first offense. Robert Downey, Jr. did the same thing. He’s just guilty of being 21. He’ll probably have to attend some alcohol awareness meetings and go through probation and most of the charges will be dropped so the prosecutors can get a conviction on one.
7:51 – Shila’s friend has a new boyfriend. They’ve been dating for a few months and he’s a nice guy, but he’s horrible in bed. The first time she thought it was just trying to match up and learn each other. Now she’s at the point that she’s starting to avoid it. Danny says that they’re as good as married. What’s the issue? Does he finish too fast? Is he gay and doesn’t realize it? He doesn’t spend enough on foreplay, he makes weird noises, and he slams her like a jackhammer and looking around the room, not at her. Danny thinks that she needs to walk him through the way she wants to get it. By throwing in compliments with come criticism she’ll get through to him and get what she wants. If the noises aren’t perverted it can be fun. Danny growls during sex. If she gives him a shot and he doesn’t make an effort to change then she can break up with him.
8:07 – Entertainment News: Miss California Carrie Prejean had her crown taken awayyesterday because she's violated her Miss USA contract. The executive director said, "This was a decision based solely on contract violations including Ms. Prejean's unwillingness to make appearances on behalf of the Miss California USA organization," Prejean caused a firestorm of controversy when she decided to take a stand against gay marriage and then was caught in another scandal when nude photos of her hit the internet, but neither of these things prompted Trump to fire her. He said, "I told Carrie she needed to get back to work and honor her contract with the Miss California USA Organization and I gave her the opportunity to do so.” Danny disagrees with her statements on same sex marriage, but likes that she stuck to her guns. He would like more nude photos though.
Alaska Governor Sarah Palin and her husband Todd are miffed about a few jokes David Letterman made at their expense. On Tuesday's show, Letterman poked fun at the pair's recent visit to New York, saying they went to Yankee Stadium and sat in "far, far right field" with former Mayor Rudy Giuliani. "They had a wonderful time," he added. "The toughest part of her visit was keeping Eliot Spitzer away from her daughter." Well, apparently the Palins didn't take kindly to the joke. Todd Palin wrote on his Facebook page, "Any 'jokes' about raping my 14-year-old are despicable. Alaskans know it and I believe the rest of the world knows it, too." Sarah continued by saying, "Laughter incited by sexually-perverted comments made by a 62-year-old male celebrity aimed at a 14-year-old girl is not only disgusting, but it reminds us some Hollywood/NY entertainers have a long way to go in understanding what the rest of America understands – that acceptance of inappropriate sexual comments about an underage girl, who could be anyone's daughter, contributes to the atrociously high rate of sexual exploitation of minors by older men who use and abuse others." If anyone should be mad it should be Letterman for letting his writers offer up that joke. Its’ comedy! Rape is also a strong word to throw around.
Hugh Hefner's former girlfriend/PlaymateKendra Wilkinson is pregnant. The 23-year-old tells E!, home of her reality show Kendra, that she and fiancé Hank Baskett are expecting. And if that wasn't enough happy news, Kendra tells E! that she and Hank have set a wedding date – June 26th at Kendra's former home, the Playboy mansion. It’s always a good idea to get married before your kid can be the ring bearer.
Liam Neeson and Bradley Cooper are in talks to star in abig screen version of the NBC series The A-Team. Cooper is currently the star of the movie The Hangover, will play Lt. Templeton "Faceman" Peck, played in the original series by Dirk Benedict, while Neeson would play Col. John "Hannibal" Smith, played in the series by the late George Peppard. Production on the film is expected begin in late August. Danny’s cool with Bradley Cooper being Faceman, but who would play B.A. Baracus? It has to be Mr. T. No one else can do it.
Philly's Funniest according to Examiner.com 1. Tina Fey
2. Paul F. Tompkins
3. Kate Flannery
4. Bradley Cooper
5. Telle (the silent guy from Penn & Teller) Did a mute guy beat Danny?
6. Larry Fine & Curly Joe DeRita
7. Adam McKay
8. Rob McElhenney
9. Seth Green
10. Danny Bonaduce
11. Adam Carolla. Adam’s brilliant, but not funny.
12.Bob Saget. Danny beat Bob Saget, nice!
13. Jamie Kennedy. Danny liked The Jamie Kennedy Experiment, but the Mask 2 was a bad move.
8:33 – Who Would Win In A Fight: David Lee Roth or Sammy Hagar?
Metro picks Sammy Hagar for size and weight advantage. DLR doesn’t take himself seriously. Danny’s on the fence, but points out that DLR is in better shape than Sammy these days. Shila takes Sammy because DLR busted his head open at the Keswick in 2003 after hitting his head on the mic during ‘Jump.’ She also thinks that DLR’s high kicks are all for show and that Sammy’s boxing background will allow him to pummel DLR. Danny takes DLR because their skills and ages aren’t that different, but if DLR was any good on the radio he wouldn’t be at WYSP today and Danny loves his gig. He gets the sentimental vote.
Magnum take DLR because of his martial arts experience and a fast mouth means fast hands. Sean goes with DLR because Sammy would commit suicide after spending time with DLR. Gil is another DLR vote because he has nothing to fight.
8:51 – Tammy takes Sammy because of size and experience in the ring. Danny takes DLR because Sammy would be depressed over not being included in Guitar Hero: Van Halen. Alan is a vote fore Sammy because there’s no record of DLR ever being in a fight. Zoli takes DLR because Danny said so. DLR takes the phone votes and on the text. DLR WINS!!!
9:05 – Susan Barnett from CBS3 is on the show to talk about the station’s telethon for Alex’s Lemonade Stand. Alex's Lemonade Stand Foundation evolved from a young cancer patient's front yard lemonade stand to a nationwide fundraising movement to find a cure for childhood cancer. Since Alexandra "Alex" Scott (1996-2004) set up her front-yard stand at the age of four, more than $25 million has been raised towards fulfilling her dream of finding a cure for all children with cancer.
There are three ways to help out today. Call log on to cbs3.com, call 1-877-KYW-3 ASK to make a donation over the phone, or in person at a CBS3 Lemonade Stands at 16th and Hamilton in the city or in Ocean City, New Jersey at Rita's Water Ice on The Boardwalk.
9:26 – Maria LaRosa from CBS3 is in the studio and Danny is excited to introduce her to Batter Blaster. Danny likes it when his weather people are certified meteorologists and smokin’ hot. She’s the mother of two children, she worked hard at the gym and eating right to get back in shape. She works the early shift and gets up at 2am every morning.
Danny takes a call from ‘John’ who wants to kill himself. Danny sells him on making a better legacy for his children. Suicide is the coward’s way out.
Back to Maria, pancakes, and Alex’s Lemonade Stand. Maria’s fired up for some pancakes. Maria’s husband doesn’t make breakfast for her. Danny does nice things like microwave towels to warm them up so Amy has toasty towels when she steps out of the shower. Mr. LaRosa’s got some competition.
9:42 – Maria is digging Danny’s pancakes. Batter Blaster is fun for all ages! Maria likes a man who’s not afraid to cry. Maria could have a new man in her life.
9:45 – News with Shila:
Philadelphia Police arrested two teenage brothers who broke into a cemetery and stole remains from a mausoleum to allegedly sell for cult worship. Authorities say Hector Cruz, 19, and his 17-year-old brother, were arrested for vandalizing a crypt at the North Cedar Hill Cemetery in Northeast Philadelphia. The teens allegedly stuffed the remains of three adults and a baby buried between the 1880s and 1921 into two duffle bags and left them on a lot near their Kensington home. Police discovered the bones and arrested the brothers after receiving a tip. The teens claim they stole the remains to sell to a man willing to pay nearly $800 per skull. The buyer was allegedly going to use them as practice for occult practices.
An imposter posing as a volunteer in Delaware has been arrested for stealing from the church. John Vattilano, 39, was arrested after stealing cash from a ticket booth at St. John the Beloved Catholic Church's carnival. A witness told police Vattilano entered the booth wearing a staff shirt and convinced other volunteers that he needed to empty the register to make a deposit. When Vattilano walked away, the witness realized what had happened and reported the incident to the police. Vattilano was arrested several days later at St. Anthony's carnival in Wilmington. This guy is asking for a spot in hell, stealing from a church.
A 10-inch fish caught by a man in Hawaii coughed up a ticking gold watch! Curt Carish says he was enjoying a picnic on the beach last Wednesday when he spotted the fish swimming unusually close to shore. He went over and caught the fish by hand, and noticed it had an abnormally large belly as he threw it into a cooler. Carish's friend opened the cooler a little while later and found a gold watch next to the fish's mouth. The watch was ticking and kept the correct time. Good news a dude found a gold watch. Bad news someone lost a watch. Good news the gold watch is still ticking. Danny would sell the story of the working watch back to the watch company for a brilliant ad campaign.
No one wants to suffer a spinal injury and lose the use of their arms and legs. But if you have to be a quadriplegic at least you might get a trained monkey to help around the house. A nonprofit organization in Boston called Helping Hands trains monkeys to perform household tasks for paralyzed people. They use Capuchin monkeys, which are like those little ''organ grinder'' monkeys. The monkeys can cook food in a microwave, play DVDs and CDs, turn the pages of a book, comb your hair, and even scratch your face when it itches. Helping Hands has been providing monkeys for 30 years, and they place about five monkeys a year. It costs about $50,000 to train a monkey, but Helping Hands operates on donations . . . so they can provide them to quadriplegics free of charge. Danny would prefer to enlist the help of a relative rather than a monkey that could freak out and rip his face off.
10:00 – Danny’s Final Thought: When I think of Philadelphia I think of the Liberty Bell, Independence Hall, and Maria LaRosa. And only one of them looks snuggly.
6:01 – Danny watched a lot of Current TV, a station that’s for people with short attention spans. Danny thinks he’s either a genius or a retard. It’s a fine line. He’s wanted to put a fireman’s pole in his new house. Amy’s not so hot on the idea. She thinks that Danny’s son Dante will hurt himself sliding down it and the pole would also lock the furniture where it is because of the tight space in the house. Danny then thought of running a rope down the four floors so he could slide down and untie it when Dante comes to town. He initially wanted to get a railroad tie to anchor the rope, but Home Depot doesn’t carry them, so he got 4 8 foot 4x4’s. When he got home he put the wood over the hole and it turned out he incorrectly measured the opening and now there’s a chunk of wood in one of the stairs. In another stroke of genius Danny rented a crane and a crane operator to move his player piano up the house through a window. Well, the crane rental doesn’t come with workers, just a crane operator. So it could be Danny and Gibbons moving the player piano 40 feet in the air. Maybe Murphy’s and Murphy’s Law can help Danny move the piano tomorrow. 6:36 – SPORTS:
Ryan Howard, Raul Ibanez, Chase Utley and Jimmy Rollins all took Mets ace Johan Santana deep, but the Phillies lost to their rivals, 6-5, in a slugfest on Tuesday night at Citi Field.
The Flyers have come to terms with goalie Ray Emery, sources said. The Flyers are scheduled to hold a news conference on Wednesday morning to announce the one-year deal. Emery, 26, spent three seasons with the Ottawa Senators before playing professionally in Russia last year.
6:49 – Danny tracked down the alleged photo of David Carradine’s death. James, a listener to lives in Bangkok and downloads the podcasts sent it in. Danny’s not certain that it’s Carradine. There are many inconsistencies in what police are reporting and what’s in the photo. So it’s a fake photo on the front page of Thai newspapers. We can't post the photo here because the Carradine family has threatened lawsuits against any newspaper or website that publishes them.
7:07 – News with Shila: Philadelphia Police announced DNA test results link a person of interest to the rape of a young Kensington girl who was attacked on her way to school last week. Jose Carrasquillo, 26, remains in police custody on unrelated charges, but police expect to charge him today in connection to the violent rape of an 11-year-old girl. Police say DNA taken from the scene of the crime matches Carrasquillo's DNA profile. The young victim's family thanked the community for their help during a weekend barbeque.
Philadelphia Police have arrested a suspect in connection with a Center City bank robbery Monday morning. The Citizens Bank near 20th and Market Streets was robbed by the suspect believed to be in his 70’s, but is actually 59-years-old. He was seen wearing wrap-around sunglasses, a brown hat, brown shirt and brown pants in surveillance photos from the bank. The F.B.I. took the suspect into custody in West Philadelphia Tuesday morning.
A Philadelphia school teacher is under investigation for allegedly throwing a stapler that struck a student in the head. 15-year-old boy received four stitches in his forehead Friday afternoon. A School district spokesman that the male teacher threw the stapler when his class became unruly. Gallard said the stapler bounced off a wall and struck the student. The mother said the incident happened as her son was passing the classroom and stopped at the door to talk with a friend. Authorities declined to name the teacher but said he has been reassigned to an administrative office pending a "full investigation." Is Danny willing to take a stapler to the head for the show? Not really. The teacher wasn’t aiming at the kid, but he still hit the kid.
The cockpit voice recorder transcript was released from US Airways Flight 1549, which landed safely in New York's Hudson River back in January. Less than a minute before the plane was hit by birds, the pilots were were admiring the view of the Hudson River. Captain Chesley Sullenberger said to the co-pilot, "Uh, what a view of the Hudson today." The co-piot says, "Birds." "Whoa," and there is the sound of thumping. The transcripts were released during a federal safety hearing which began today.
Two parents in Texas believe their son is the reincarnation of a WWII fighter pilot. A little more than two weeks after his second birthday, James Leininger - now seven - began having recurring nightmares about a plane on fire. He then would recount vivid details of planes and war tragedies that no two-year-old would know. So his parents started to fact-check their son's accounts and eventually discovered that he was reliving the past life of a World War II fighter pilot named James Huston! Now, the parents have released a book documenting this strange phenomenon, called Soul Survivor. Danny did some past life regression with a hypnotist for a television show that was taped recently, but asked to not be told what he went though so he could see it on the program. Shila might be too jittery for hypnosis. Are there enough dead lives to go around for all the live people for reincarnation?
7:31 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Dana, a single mom with twins, lost everything in her home to a house fire and moved in with her boyfriend. Then guy announced he was interested in dating other women so she moved out and then begged to get her back. Now they’re all living in the same house and telling the twins that he’s their new dad. Danny says that Dana has a huge target on her back because she’s got mouths to feed. Save all the money you can while he tries to weasel his way into the lives of her daughters and when he tries to cheat again, she has a winning hand to play.
James has a 20 year-old stepson who’s not interested in working, just getting laid. Rather than ask when he’s going to get a job, call a locksmith! Start charging rent and tell him that he has to contribute to the household.
Karen is moving out on her boyfriend after some tense times and now he’s throwing all the sweet talk her way. The easiest way to get away from one guy is to get under another. Men love women with low self esteem and single moms that smell of desperation.
7:48 – Lindsay, Alex and Kristen of the Eagles Cheerleaders are in the studio; they’re back from a photo shoot in Aruba for their annual swimsuit calendar. The calendar is always sexy; this year will be no different. Alex is a veteran skydiver having gone on 23 jumps, she was confident until her first solo jump. Then she was scared. Kristen is a fan of Cirq du Soleil, but she’s never tried any of the tricks the performers do on stage. Danny has a 4 story rope to climb at his home!
The girls are fired up for the very first Eagles Flight Night, August 2nd at Lincoln Financial Field. Having players mic’ed up on the field will lead to some interesting on-field interaction. The girls don’t always get noticed on the streets of the city, but they’re always on their best behavior. 7:48 – Lindsay, Alex and Kristen of the Eagles Cheerleaders are in the studio; they’re back from a photo shoot in Aruba for their annual swimsuit calendar. The calendar is always sexy; this year will be no different. Alex is a veteran skydiver having gone on 23 jumps, she was confident until her first solo jump. Then she was scared. Kristen is a fan of Cirq du Soleil, but she’s never tried any of the tricks the performers do on stage. Danny has a 4 story rope to climb at his home!
The girls are fired up for the very first Eagles Flight Night, August 2nd at Lincoln Financial Field. Having players mic’ed up on the field will lead to some interesting on-field interaction. The girls don’t always get noticed on the streets of the city, but they’re always on their best behavior.
8:10 – Entertainment News:
If you're planning on picking up the new "Guitar Hero: Van Halen" video game, don't expect any Sammy Hagar-era songs, and you won't even see Sammy or original bassist Michael Anthony. David Lee Roth will be the only singer featured in the game, and Wolfgang Van Halen is the bass player. Looks like Michael Anthony backed the wrong horse.
The new Smashing Pumpkins drummer is just a kid! 19-year-old Mike Byrne from the Oregon-based band Moses, Smell The Roses is Billy Corgan's pick to replace Jimmy Chamberlain. Last week, Billy posted on HIS blog that he's found "the drummer of the future" and that after working with him for a few days, he was expected back before an official announcement is made.
David Carradine went to a Los Angeles sex shop just three weeks before he died and placed a large order for clothing, toys and videos. According to the owner of Susie's Delights in Tarzana, CA,, Carradine was a regular in the store. The owner said Carradine owned almost every piece of bondage equipment in the store. The order Carradine placed three weeks ago included women's lingerie, stockings, a few pieces of bondage equipment and three bondage DVDs. The owner told TMZ when Carradine placed the order he talked to her for almost an hour, saying he was upset because he felt his wife was unhappy with him. Danny’s planning a trip to Thailand soon and just might end up in the Carradine room. Danny’s stayed in the hotel room that Robert Downey, Jr. was arrested in and the room where Sid killed Nancy.
Mike Tyson has married for a third time. This is two weeks after his 4-year-old daughter died in a tragic treadmill accident. The owner of the La Bella Wedding Chapel at the Las Vegas Hilton hotel-casino told The AP Press on Tuesday that the former heavyweight champion and his bride, Lakiha Spicer, exchanged vows Saturday in a short, private, and simple ceremony. County marriage records in Las Vegas show the 42-year-old Tyson and 32-year-old Spicer got a marriage license about 30 minutes before their ceremony. Spicer is not Exodus' mother.
"American Idol" runner-up Adam Lambert has told Rolling Stone magazine he is gay, answering a question that followed the singer for months since he gained millions of fans on the No. 1 U.S. TV talent show. If Danny was gay and on American Idol he’d have taken a shot at Ryan Seacrest. 8:30 – Guess Who Tweeted!
Danny reads a quote from a famous tweeter, the listeners that get them right get tickets to see Kenny Chesney at Lincoln Financial Field.
1. My face is not all sweaty. It was humid last night. I don’t cake on make up to go to dinner with friends. God!
a.Lilly Allen*
b.Britney Spears
c.Megan Fox
2. I have my girl mode and my boy mode. I call it that, but it kind of says it all. I wear what I want when I want, no one dictates when. OK?
a.Samantha Ronson
b.Eddie Izzard*
c.RuPaul
3. I keep putting off my workout today, I’m craving fondue.
a. Ryan Seacrest*
b. Eva Mendes
c. Chelsea Handler
8:48 – Danny takes bids on a breakfast with the show and Maria Larosa from CBS3. Danny will make pancakes with the Batter Blaster and the proceeds will benefit Alex’s Lemonade Stand. Look for WYSP DJ’s taking donation calls during the telethon on CBS3 tomorrow. $1051 is the winning bid. NICE!
8:56 – Mike is on the line, he wrote Danny a letter on behalf of his son inviting him to get some Rock Band lessons. Danny invites Mike’s family to dinner and some Rock Band and Mike accepts.
9:03 – Danny’s old friend Andy Dick is on the show. He’s not bleeding at the moment, those days are behind him. He’s cleaned up his act and he’s not 11 months sober. Andy’s performing at the Just For Laughs Comedy Festival soon. He does an hour-long stage show with a live band backing him.
Danny was at the opening of a cool bar in Los Angeles when some guy was getting in Andy’s face. Danny was about to step in when Andy hit the guy in the face with a beer mug, which didn’t shatter. The big guy went down and Danny returned to having fun.
9:29 – News with Shila:
Police in Montgomery County are searching for the vandals responsible for a crime spree. Police said there were 40 incidents totaling approximately $50,000 in damage in Lower Providence Township. Investigators say someone -- or a group of people -- set an SUV on fire and the flamed extended to the home's garage. According to police, the suspects vandalized cars parked on the block. Several cars had their tires slashed while others were broken into and damaged. That’s not hardcore enough to be vandals, that’s just punk thuggery.
One person is dead and a second is presumed dead after a tragic kayaking accident in Chester County Tuesday afternoon. Authorities say the search for the missing kayakers in the Brandywine Creek in began at about 1 p.m. Tuesday after both of the kayakers apparently overturned. Police say they were seen going over a damn and then under another damn and they were submerged. The men were believed to be in their mid 30s. Crews are expected to resume their search of the second body today. Officials said both kayakers were wearing life vests at the time of the accident. Danny’s an experienced kayaker, it’s tough to right yourself if you’re upside down coming out of a dam.
An explosion at a Slim Jim plant in North Carolina killed two workers Tuesday and injured more than 40 others. Four people were critically burned and one worker was still unaccounted for Tuesday night. The explosion partially collapsed the roof; parts of the front of the building were also blown out. Injuries ranged from severe burns to smoke inhalation, and three firefighters needed medical attention after inhaling ammonia gases. Authorities had not yet pinpointed where in the plant the blast happened or what caused it. If there’s a missing worker at a Slim Jim factory then Danny’s staying away from them for a while.
9:48 – Danny might have destroyed his stairs while trying to put together a rope to climb in his house, but he did fix a leaky faucet using candle wax. It might not making up for throwing a log down 4 stories, but it’s close. Why didn’t Danny use a tape measure to get the right length of wood while he was at the hardware store? It occurred to him, but the guestimate should have been close enough.
9:58 – Danny’s Final Thought: What are the odds of being killed in a Slim Jim accident? I’d say slim. So live every day like it’s your last.
6:02 – Danny’s voice is shot from playing Guitar Hero all night. Amy’s ‘mean’ sister, Crystal, is staying with Danny and Amy for a few days. Amy’s mom was easy to win over; the sister Crystal was not so easy though. She might not be the mean sister anymore. Laughing Cow cheese was the thing that won her over. To show off Danny drops a cube of the cheese from the third floor of the house to the second, but his aim wasn’t so good and hit her in the forehead. Crystal fell in love with Guitar Hero and one song turned into three hours of a family fun at Danny’s house. Danny is like the Willy Wonka of Philadelphia with his house of candy, cheese, games, and liquor. Crystal declared that it was more like Teen Cribs.
6:33 – Danny has tickets to Eagles Flight Night for the first caller that can identify the Eagle how likes snowboarding in New Mexico and collects movies.
Raul Ibanez, Jimmy Rollins, and Chase Utley are all frontrunners in NL All-Star voting.
Minnesota Vikings coach Brad Childress has imposed a deadline of this week for Brett Favre to decide whether he will be the team's quarterback for the upcoming season. Favre, however, is apparently reluctant to commit to playing a 19th NFL season without first being more confident the arthroscopic surgery performed recently on his throwing shoulder has succeeded in eliminating all of the problems related to a torn biceps tendon. Dr. James Andrews performed the surgery.
6:45 – Danny got an e-mail from Mike who put together a list of the Top 10 Child Stars Who Turned Into Hotties.
10
Jodi Sweetin/Full House.
9
Candace Cameron/Full House.
8
Keisha Knight Pulliam/Cosby Show.
7
Soleil Moon Frye/Punky Brewster. She had breast reduction surgery years ago.
6
Danica McKellar/Wonder Years. She used to have a squishy face.
5
Josie Davis/Charles in Charge. Danny thinks she looks like a hot lesbian.
4
Tiffany Amber Theissen/Saved By the Bell.
3
Tatiana Ali/Fresh Prince of Bell Air. Danny thinks she’s faking the funk and she’s not so hot.
2
Nicole Eggert/Charles in Charge.
1
Alyssa Milano/Who’s The Boss? Danny thinks that she’s lost some of her shine over the past few years.
7:10 – News with Shila:
The Radnor School District said more than 70 students at Ithan Elementary School were absent from school with flu-like symptoms. Officials said many of the students had a fever along with a cough or sore throat. The district is performing additional sanitation measures, including wiping down the bathrooms, railings, desks, door knobs and light switches. District officials are urging parents to keep their children at home if they are experiencing flu-like symptoms. Danny thinks that 60 of the kids are faking it. Danny went to the hospital 10 times with a temperature of over 105 degrees when he was young. That explains some things…
Philadelphia Police are searching for an elderly suspect in the robbery of a Center City bank Monday morning. Authorities said a man in his 70s entered a Citizens Bank near 20th and Market Streets just after 9:30 a.m. He threatened a teller to fill a pillowcase with money. The teller complied and placed an undisclosed amount of money along with a dye pack inside the pillowcase. However, the dye pack exploded, covering the suspect and the cash in red dye. The man in his 70s, approximately 5'11" tall with a thin build. He was wearing wrap-around sunglasses, a brown hat, brown shirt and brown pants at the time of the robbery. Any info on him, please contact the Philadelphia Police. A reward may be offered.
Police say a Delaware man who faked his own kidnapping used the ransom paid by his sister to buy cocaine. William Holland, 45, sent his sister a text message on June 3 saying he had been kidnapped by drug dealers. Holland told his sister he was being held for ransom against his will and needed her to pay cash for his release. So being a good sister she meet the alleged drug dealer and paid him $200, but that wasn't good enough. The sister received another text message from the alleged dealer asking for more money if she ever wanted to see her brother alive again. So she complied, but then she called the police and they tracked down the cell phone where the text messages were coming from. Police tracked the cell phone to 42-year-old John Reynolds of Wilmington. Police then searched Reynolds' home and found Reynolds and Holland in the basement. They wre both arrested. Delaware man fake kidnapping. If any of Danny’s brothers or sister got a text asking for a ransom for him they’d tell the kidnapper to keep him.
Here are some things to avoid if you're dating someone much older...or much younger:
In a perfect world, it wouldn't matter if you and your partner had an age difference of ten, 20 or even 30 years. But in the real world it DOES matter according to a new CNN article.
1. Stay away from age-related nicknames: Calling your partner age-related nicknames might seem "cute" at first . . . but nicknames like that are actually demeaning when you think about it
2. There's no need for constant reminders of your age difference: Do you really want to hear your partner say something like "I've been having sex since you were in pre-school"? Of course not, because that's creepy. So you should probably avoid it.
3. Don't assume OLDER means WISER: Why? Because an idiot's an idiot . . . no matter what their age.
4. Realize that sometimes older DOES mean wiser: On the other hand, if your partner is ten years older than you, that means they've got ten years of experience on you. It's just something to keep in mind.
5. Some behaviors have an expiration date: When your 20-year-old boyfriend smokes pot every day . . . it can almost be endearing. But when you 40-year-old boyfriend does it . . . you have to ask yourself: "Dude, what's this guy's REAL issue?"
6. Prepare to feel out of place: If you and your partner have an age difference of 15 years . . . then there's a good chance that so do your respective groups of friends. Just know that things could get awkward . . . especially with family members.
7:30 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Bill lost contact with an old friend, they get back together and it turns out the old friend robbed him blind. The guy took his TV, video game systems, and so much more. Bill’s old friend hasn’t shown up to court, but Bill still gets notices to show up and it’s costing him money from work. Danny says to approach the prosecutors and ask about bench warrants. The guy will be thrown in jail for skipping the court dates and then face the charges of robbing Bill, but Bill will never get his stuff of the cash equivalent back.
Paul wants to be legally separated from his wife, but hasn’t filed any paperwork, they’re just living apart. Danny suggests a visit to legalzoom.com, which will save him money. He gets his kids one night a week and on weekends. That’s joint custody. What does that mean for child support? It depends on the lifestyle they’re accustomed to.
Tom’s friend is looking to get paid for a job he did over a year ago and is due the money due to a judgment. It depends on if the company filed bankruptcy, if it was Chapter 11 Tom’s friend can put a Mason Lein against the company owner’s home which will get him paid.
8:08 – Entertainment News:
A couple conflicting theories have come up regarding the death of Actor David Carradine. Carradine's lawyer has suggested that the actor may have been killed because of his interest in secret martial arts groups. Meanwhile, it doesn't sound like David Carradine's third ex-wife Gail Jensen isn't shocked by the speculation that he may have died during auto erotic asphyxiation. She said, "David was pretty strange. He would like to get tied up," "He would tie himself up and I would walk in and see him and say, 'oh my god David, you've got to be kidding me' – and I would walk out. I would leave him to his own devices." But in another interview, she said that while David liked to tie himself up, "it was never sexual." The photo of Carradine that was printed in the Thai tabloid shows the actor hanging from a clothes bar, wearing a wig with fishnets covering his body. There also appears to be a piece of red lingerie lying on the bed. Danny thinks that the intense interest in secret martial arts is NOT the reason he died. Danny wants to go on record that it would be against his character that he’d be into autoerotic asphyxiation. Wearing a tooth around his neck is as freaky as he gets.
After smacking his head on stage after his performance at the Tony Awards Bret Michaels publicist says Bret got a fractured nose and busted lip out of the deal, and had a CAT scan done yesterday because he screwed up his neck a few years ago. Poison will hit the road with Def Leppard and Cheap Trick later this month, coming to Camden June 23rd.
Alice In Chains has signed a deal with EMI's Virgin Records and will release a new studio album in September. It's been 14 years since the last one, which was the band's final work with lead singer Layne Staley who died of an overdose in 2002. The new frontman is William DuVall who also plays rhythm guitar. He toured with Alice In Chains in 2006.
Foul Mouthed Gordon Ramsay is known for Hell's Kitchen may have gone a bit too far during an appearance at Australia's Good Food and Wine Show. Ramsay went off on a sexist rant about Australian journalist Tracy Grimshaw, at one point calling her "a lesbian." He then showed a picture of a naked woman on her hands and knees with features of a pig and multiple breasts and told the audience, "That's Tracy Grimshaw. I had an interview with her yesterday. Holy crap. She needs to see Simon Cowell's Botox doctor." Then, Tracy Grimshaw interviewed Ramsay on Friday for A Current Affair and during the interview he commented on her facial mole, saying, "Is that a wart? It looks like your little sister's on your lip." Ramsay's spokesperson insists all the comments were in good fun. "He really respects Tracy Grimshaw as a journalist. It was a joke," said the rep. "They have a great relationship." Danny got into a shoving match with Ramsay once. Not so tough when push comes to shove after all.
Dan Gross is reporting that screen legend Clint Eastwood recently donated $500 to Rat Chick Rat Rescue, a rodent-adoption service run by South Philly's Maria Pandolfi, reports. Eastwood and wife Dina, who keep several pet rats, had donated $1,000 to the organization in 2007. For more on the rescue, visit ratchickratrescue.com. 8:30 – Gene Simmons in on the show now. He was impressed by Danny’s last boxing match, he looked so good in shorts he’d be the most popular boy in jail. Gene once called Danny out on his drinking and Danny thought he was making a big deal over nothing. Two days later Danny was in rehab. Gene has tasted alcohol, he just doesn’t like it. Family Jewels just started it’s fourth season. Danny asks Gene if he’s worried about how good looking and talented his son Nick is. Gene does know his son has the star quality and he’s going to be very big. Young women line up to meet him, just to ask about Nick. Danny’s fiancée Amy taught Gene’s kids in school, she’s a 26 year-old cougar. Gene’s learning Mandarin so he can be on the cutting edge of the Chinese economy. Gene auctioned off his kidney stones for charity and also raised almost $80,000 for a dinner party with he and Shannon Tweed. Danny knows that his daughter Isabella is a huge fan of Gene so he asks Gene to tape a voicemail greeting. 8:48 – Danny reads some of Arthur Kade’s blog post about appearing on the show yesterday. Arthur seems to be a novice at detecting sarcasm. Shila knew that he was going to rate her on his scale and he gave her a 6.5 on his scale. Danny was not impressed with Arthur’s appearance on the show. Arthur wants to box Danny? It would be fun to punch the dude. Danny is certain that Arthur is gay and that not coming out is a move of cowardice. Danny reads some of the comments from Arthur’s blog. They’re not kind to Arthur at all. Consonants are not continents.
Jackie calls to ask who Danny is ripping. That’s the point. Shila reads some more of the blog. Danny goes through some more comments on the blog and thanks Arthur for being another meal for the carnivore that is the Danny Bonaduce Show.
9:06 – Viewer Mail!
Paul writes to tell Danny his is the shiznit. Shila writes a response to Paul as Danny dictates. Thizank You.
Mike’s son, Tommy, played Danny in Rock Band at an FYE and asked his dad to invite Danny over to learn how to play Rock Band better because ‘Danny’s not so good.’ Tommy is autistic and Danny is willing to take Tommy up on his offer and kick his little Rain Man ass.
Ed asks Danny do a little less talking when guests are on the show. Shila writes a response as Danny dictates. He’s familiar with this criticism, but he is far more interesting than many of his guests.
Joe writes to challenge Danny on the his statement that Lisa Rinna’s lips are real. They are not. Danny concedes this facts, but neither of them would pass up a ‘favor’ by Rinna.
Ed writes to tell Danny that he has the domain Bonaduce.net and he’s willing to give it to Danny free of charge so Gretchen doesn’t get it. Danny calls Ed on the air to ask him about the domain name. We’ve got a taker! Danny needs to know what to do with it though. Ed volunteers to be the webmaster of the site and make it flashy.
9:32 – News with Shila:
A judge has ruled the Philadelphia Eagles owe the city $8 million in skybox revenue from Veterans Stadium. The judge is also expected to decide how much the city of Philadelphia owes the Eagles for a canceled preseason game in 2001 at the former stadium. Both sides say they are equally pleased with the decision and are just waiting to hear how much they both owe.
The Philadelphia Department of Public Health and Disease Control have reported that a Philadelphia resident has died from complications of a H1N1 (Swine Flu) infection. She died Sunday while being treated at an area hospital. She is the first swine flu-related death in Philly. So far, 70 cases of H1N1 (Swine flu) have been confirmed in Philadelphia and 11 probable cases are under investigation.
Police say a man has been arrested after he exposed his genitals to a young boy over the weekend. Police announced the arrest of Robert Jarjisian, 57, of Quarryville, Pa. with the crime. Officers say a warrant was issued for his arrest, and he turned himself in on Monday. Robert flashed his genitals to a 12 year old boy in the bathroom at Macy's inside the Exton Square Mall on Saturday. That's not a flashing. Unless it's George Michael that showing off his goods then kick away. Community microwaves are always dirty and smelly. Now that smell is going to be multiplied across every office desk daily.
Heinz has created the world's smallest, portable microwave and can be powered by a USB port on a laptop computer. The turquoise device -called the Beanzawave - has been created in partnership with Heinz to allow workers tied to their desks to create a warm snack, or hot drink, to see them through the day. Heinz claims there is a ready market for the ovens. Its research found 69 per cent of office workers find they are so busy at their terminals that they do not have a chance to go out for lunch every day
A woman in Colorado just wants to be able to do her gardening dressed like a ho! Catharine Pierce, 51, and her husband Robert Pierce, 58, are fighting for the right to garden in their front yard wearing nothing but thongs and pasties. They technically aren't breaking the law if their genitals are covered, but neighbors want the couple evicted. "We want our freedom," Robert Pierce said. "We want exactly what the law gives you, and we don't want to be harassed about it." Danny would rather see naked neighbors than banana hammocks. Using a weed wacker while in the nude could be dangerous though.
9:56 - Danny was suprised to see Spike lifting weights this morning against doctor's orders this morning. Spike hurt his back lifting earlier this year and has been out of comission for a while. He doesn't want to talk about this on the air because his girlfriend will be upset.
9:59 – Danny’s Final Thought: I’d like to thank Marv Albert, David Carradine, Micheal Hutchence, and Bob Crane for making sure I go down in history as an okay guy.
6:03 – Danny played Guitar Hero until 3am this morning. It’s addictive, but not like crack. He had a great time at Shop Rite promoting Batter Blaster. There were many gracious 50 year-old women who asked Danny for autographs for their grandkids while reinforcing to Danny that they wouldn’t know who he is. That’s an ego booster. Danny has a new love and it’s Batter Blaster. Danny learned to make pancake designs with Batter Blaster, like Mickey Mouse. Jeff the Program Director came out to hang out with Danny and made a partridge with the Batter Blaster, which turned out perfect. The old ladies reinforced that it looked like Danny, even though he doesn’t look like a bird. Danny plans to make breakfast for Shila and Metro, so they can experience the genius of the Batter Blaster.
6:19 – Corey calls to ask Danny if he ever met Elvis Presley. He knows the answer, but thinks it’s a cool story. Elvis gave Danny a car when he was six years-old. Danny plays a one-man band in a circus in The Trouble With Girls. Danny was walking by Elvis’s trailer on the set with the legs of mannequins all in lingerie and told Danny they were his trophies. Danny was so excited he asked Elvis to show his mom the trophies, which made for an awkward moment. Elvis took a liking to Danny and gave him an electric car as a gift after the movie wrapped. 6:36 – SPORTS: The Phillies are heading back East with something that has eluded them through the early season: excellent starting pitching. They ended their weeklong West Coast trip by beating Los Angeles, 7-2, at Dodger Stadium.
6:49 – Danny has a rule in his house: No old boyfriends, No old girlfriends. It prevents drama, ex’s don’t belong in the house, it just starts trouble. Danny was thrown off when Hugh Hefner and Hank Baskett met face to face on last night’s premiere episode of Kendra. That would NOT be cool with Danny. He’d immediately visualize the ex having sex with the girl you care about. Can you hold it against the girl? Not really. Jim calls to say that he dated a girl that was awful in bed, years later he runs into her new husband who invited him over to hang out for a barbecue. That’s far too civilized for Danny. He’d want to beat any of the old suitors to death. James’ current girlfriend is living with her ex-boyfriend. He doesn’t care for it, but she says there’s nothing going on there. Shila would not tolerate that. After a while being friendly with ex’s should fade.
7:08 – News with Shila:
26-year-old Michael Zenquis says it was Monday afternoon and he was walking home when he was suddenly attacked by 5 or 6 people, some of whom he knew from the neighborhood. They kept screaming at him calling him rapist as they beat him reapeatedly with baseball bats. He told him that he was innocent, but the so-called vigilanties didn’t listen. Police officers took him to the hospital where detectives realized he was not the guy they were looking for and let him go. He says he feels terrible for the little girl that was raped and understands the anger people felt, but he feels that people should not take the law into their own hands. He won’t sue the guys that beat him, he’ll sue the city who didn’t press charges against the other vigilantes for beatings in Kensington.
A young rancher named Neal Wanless, who is 23 years old lives in one of the poorest parts of the country in Todd County South Dakota. However that is all over now. Neal became the winner of one of the biggest undivided jackpots in U.S. lottery history at $232 million dollars. And he bought the ticket in a town called Winner, South Dakota. Wanless, who is single and lives with his mother and father on the family's 320-acre ranch near said he's going to buy himself a bigger spread, repay the kindness other townspeople have shown his family and spend his newfound fortune wisely. Wanless bought $15 worth of tickets to the May 27 30-state drawing at a convenience store in Winner during a trip to buy livestock feed. Danny’s going to buy a bigger spread too. Her name is Pam Anderson.
Parents do you ever worry how your teens are driving when you are not in your car with them? Well, worry no more. There's a product on the market called the Speed Demon . . . which allows you to keep track of how fast your kid is driving in real time. And if your kid goes over the speed limit, the Speed Demon will send you a text message or an email to let you know. Basically, once installed, the Speed Demon gauges how fast your car is traveling. Then it compares that information against GPS coordinates and detailed street maps to determine if your kid is breaking the speed limit. The Speed Demon costs $250 plus a monthly service fee of $15. You can buy the Speed Demon here at livefastdriveslow.com. There’s a similar device that wives can use to catch cheating husbands. Improvements in technology are out to ruin Danny’s life. 7:30 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Jamie is having trouble getting hi stay at home wife to take care of the house. Firstoff, it’s everyone’s job to cook and clean, so change tactics. Stop cooking, cleaning, taking the trash out, and see how filthy she’s willing to live before she breaks down. They also haven’t had sex in a while. Either feed me or let me eat elsewhere. Get off your ass and get on your back!
Lisa is on disability, she’s trying to move in to a new house while still paying rent at her current apartment. Being disabled there’s the ability to get a grant to help her jumpstart her new life.
7:48 – Another episode of Gretchen’s show, Reinventing Bonaduce, aired last night. It featured more Danny bashing, although it’s supposed to be about her life. Danny made more money for his short appearance on the show than Gretchen made for the whole series. Last night the first segment of the in-studio fight with Gretche, Kevin, and Danny aired on the television show. Danny calls Bob Boden, president of the Fox Reality Show, on the air. Danny offers him a show that’s better than Gretchen’s. He’s willing to do whatever it takes to get Gretchen off television, at a cut rate price, because she’s putting a dull shine on the Bonaduce name. Let Fox Reality know you want a Danny show filmed in Philly, post about it here.
8:06 – Entertainment News:
Bret Michaels had an accident at the Tony Awards last night. Michaels, star of the reality show "Rock of Love," took to the stage with his hair-metal band Poison during the opening production number. They performed "Nothin' But a Good Time" with the cast of "Rock of Ages." When Bret was exiting the stage, a set piece on it’s way down to stage smacked him on the head and knocked him to the ground. Tonys spokeswoman says the rocker "missed his mark."
The family of actor David Carradine has asked the FBI to step in to aid the investigation into the actor's death. Carradine's naked body was found tied up with rope and hanged in a Bangkok hotel. The actor's family is very upset with how Thai police have been handling the investigation and are bothered by conflicting information that has come out about it. The actor's half brother, Keith Carradine, says that he "wants authorities to investigate his brother’s death, and to determine if anyone else was involved." The results of the autopsy won't be released for several weeks, but the family is also seeking another independent autopsy. The family is also "profoundly disturbed" by pictures of what appears to be Carradine's body that turned up in a Bangkok tabloid. On Saturday, the Thai Rath paper printed a grainy picture of what appeared to be a naked man with his hands bound together over his head and his feet on the floor. Thai police believe the photo was taken by their forensics team. The Carradine family has threatened legal action against any paper that reprints the photo.
Megan Fox loves her tattoos and she doesn't care if they cost her movie roles. In fact, she says she wants a tattoo "sleeve." "I like the way getting a tattoo feels. If I'm depressed, it's nice to get one and deal with the pain," she said. Meanwhile, in a recent interview with GQ magazine she compared acting to prostitution. "We get paid to feign attraction and love." "Other people are paying to watch us kissing someone, touching someone, doing things people in a normal monogamous relationship would never do with anyone who’s not their partner. It’s really kind of gross." Danny is OVER Megan Fox now. Very pretty face, very dumb mouth.
Topless photos of Britney Spears were taken in July 2007 during the filming of her music video, "Gimme More" have surfaced on the internet.
Gene Simmons will literally sell anything for money. The Kiss bassist and singer put his kidney stone up for auction on eBay. Some crazy Kiss fan Kiss bought the stones for 15,000-dollars! Gene donated the money to charity. 8:33 – The Art of Manliess
Luann’s son was just sentenced to time in prison. What does he need to know? He’ll get time off for good behavior. He doesn’t need to do anything to get on the guard’s good side. Sucking up to the guards will make him look like a snitch. Behave nicely around other inmates, but don’t start trouble and don’t ask what someone else is in for. Let the other guy tell you what he’s in for. Stay away from gang affiliation. Don’t become a target. Don’t do favors, it’s the first step in becoming a bitch. Don’t do anything on credit in jail, because you won’t be able to pay it back. That means you’ll be in debt, which leads to getting punked. Don’t become anyone’s ‘girlfriend’ because relationships don’t last. If none of that is possible, then punch a guard to go into solitary and then keep that behavior up. It will extend the time, but he’ll be alone. If you have to, fight tooth and nail, there will be another bitch along soon enough. Just don’t go crazy. Make no enemies, make no friends, just make time. 8:50 – Arthur Kade is in the studio. It’s not a job to him; it’s who he is that makes him the cutting edge personality that he is. He’s straight. He’s willing to be disliked by the public for money and attention. He writes a blog that upsets many people because of his lofty views of himself. He knows he has a slight lisp. Arthur has an interesting scale for rating women. He thinks that Shila wants him. He’s not bad looking, but she doesn’t dig his overconfidence. Danny thinks that Arthur likes guys. Arthur says that Jessica Alba is below his scale and not worth his time. Where is Kade’s rising star going? He’s been in Philadelphia Magazine, but that’s the limit. He thinks that he’ll be a great actor because he has the drive and will. He’s going to have to have a speech therapist. Danny quizzes him on the legendary plays and movies. Arthur doesn’t do so well. He knows NOTHING about the history of acting. Danny schools Arthur on radio history. Shila asks Arthur why he baiting people into hating him? We wouldn’t know how people felt unless Arthur let us know, by giving access to communicate with him while publicizing himself.
9:07 – Arthur brings up Sex and the City, a show about women dissecting men. Not the most hetro move. Arthur spends hours a day practicing monologues. It sounds like he’s reading. Someone’s not winning an Oscar. Danny goes through some acting tricks for working with the camera on television. Ron calls to say he loves the website, but hates Arthur because he takes arrogance to a new level. Lisa expresses her dislike for Arthur, which fills him with glee. If he’s an actor on the move, why isn’t he in Los Angeles or New York? He wants to ‘build his resume.’ Jim offers Danny money to kick Arthur in the pumpkin patch. Ray calls to say that Arthur’s doing a good job acting like he’s not gay. Steve calls to compliment Danny for breaking Arthur down. Mike calls to say that Arthur has done nothing to give back to the world. Pat calls to ask who Arthur is and why he’s on the air. Arthur says that he pursued the American Dream while giving the world a view of his progress. Arthur doesn’t know the difference between consonants and continents. Consonants are letters and continents are large bodies of land. Danny’s seen more successful people pull off the bit Arthur’s trying to pull off. Arthur is going to tell a funny story….wasn’t so funny. Arthur starts bragging about the times he’s been recognized on the street. Who would be recognized more often, Danny or Arthur? Arthur’s tentative to do it. Don calls to say that Arthur is just like Gretchen, trying to feed off Danny. Danny thinks that Arthur is good at his act, but he needs to be better at it.
9:53 – Gordon is in for Spike today. Spike is going to his sister’s 5th grade graduation. It’s amazing the school functions that parents have to go to. Gordon looks like Kevin Smith if he were a lumberjack today.
9:57 – Danny’s Final Thought: You catch more flies with honey than with being a dick!
6:02 – Danny was amazed to learn that Shila and Amy didn’t know who David Carradine was. Now everybody knows who he was, however not for Kung Fu and Kill Bill. He was found in a closet in Hong Kong with a rope around his neck and another around some body parts. So he’s in the Michael Huthence club. Now being the guy from the Partridge Family doesn’t seem so bad. Danny’s never been with a girl who likes to be choked during climax, Shila knows a guy who likes it. That’s not appealing to Danny. It’s all fun and games until someone loses a Carradine. Consensus in the room is that it wasn’t suicide. Maybe Danny will try choking Amy in bed, but then he’ll go from the guy from the Partidge Family to the guy that killed his fiancée during sex.
In a recent interview with teleESPECTAD0R in Mexico, Randy Orton freaked out on the interviewer (who was much smaller in stature) and got in his face because he called Orton “fragile.” The hosts thought Orton was joking at first but Orton made it clear he was very serious
6:53 – The guys from Triumph Brewing Company are in the studio, they're this week's featured restuarant for 94WYSP's Dinner Deals. Danny’s been to the one on Chestnut Street three times in the past week. He’s a big fan. They have 8 brews on tap and have no fear in raising the strength of their brews. Metro likes the Honey Wheat, is that a girls beer? It is their lightest beer. Danny’s got a soft spot in his heart there because the whole show got into a huge argument there. All is good now. Get a $50 gift certificate to Triumph for half price starting at 9 this morning.
7:05 – News with Shila:
Philadelphia's police commissioner, Charles Ramsey, said he will not pursue criminal charges against the group of proactive citizens who beat Jose Carrasquillo, wanted for questioning in the rape of an 11-year-old girl. Ramsey made the decision based on the fact that the man's injuries were not life-threatening. He also believed that the neighbors' intent was to bring the man to police and that they had a high level of emotion in the community after the girl's brutal attack. Carrasquillo was released from the hospital Thursday and is in police custody, but has not been charged in the rape, but investigators have very strong forensic evidence and witness identification placing him at the scene. An attorney for the ACLU said she thought the commissioner's decision not to file charges against the neighbors sent the wrong message to the community. Danny thinks that the vigilantes should be charged, but fail at them so things don't get out o control on the streets.
A US Airways employee let a passenger he knew avoid security at the Philadelphia airport and accepted a bag containing a gun, which was later found on a flight destined for Phoenix. A witness notified TSA officials after spotting the airline employee take a carry-on bag from the passenger at the Airport. The carry-on contained an unloaded 9mm handgun and ammunition. US Airways employee Roshid Milledge and passenger, Damien Young, both of South Philly, have now been charged in connection with the incident. That’s a very serious crime.
A North Carolina husband allegedly used Craigslist to hire a man to rape his wife. Police said the wife called 911 Sunday morning and said that a man with a knife raped her in the bedroom of their home. Her husband was in the room at the time and two young children were also home, but the kids were unaware of what was going on. Police said the husband allegedly placed an ad on Craigslist without his wife's knowledge, looking for someone to come to his home and have sex with his wife using "scare tactics." Authorities are still investigating the identity of the man who attacked the wife and whether or not he was paid by the husband. The 25-year-old husband faces first-degree rape and other charges. This is like trying to hire a hitman, it’s just not possible. They always end up in police stings. The husband is always the first suspect in any crime against a married woman.
A high school student in Washington presented an essay on the legalization of marijuana in front of his class. As part of the presentation, the 17-year-old took out a joint and began smoking it! He then, sat down, finished smoking the joint and then ate the roach. The teacher contacted school authorities and the teen was arrested on charges of possession of marijuana. Surprisingly, the high school junior is a good student - he has a 3.7 GPA! 7:32 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Joe’s girlfriend is taking a trip to Europe to meet up with a young man she knows. The young man lives in Poland and she’s flying him around to meet up with her. Joe told her that if she plans on flying around with this boy she’d better not bother coming back. Great move! He can’t forbid her from going. If she doesn’t cheat on him in Europe and comes back then she’d probably cheat here. She has a right to meet up with a friend, but to hurt Joe’s feelings by flying this young guy around is a move to hurt Joe’s feelings. If she doesn’t have a good explanation as to why she’d choose to hurt Joe’s feelings then she’s the wrong girl.
Adrian’s ex-husband and his girlfriend want to watch their kids for the summer and are asking her to pay them $40 a day. Danny knows from experience that you can’t babysit your own children. If she’s still taking child support while he’s watching the kids then he deserves to be paid though. So Danny suggests that she strike a deal that he doesn’t have to pay child support and he doesn’t charge her the cash.
Jessica has a 5 year-old son and her ex has never paid child support. He never shows up to court and the judicial system isn’t helping. He’s been in hiding for 5 years. She doesn’t have his social security number though. Danny suggests hiring a private detective to find the father and make some progress in the case. I he crossed state lines it could be a federal case. 7:50 – WWE Superstar Jeff Hardy is on the show now. He’s going for the World Heavyweight Championship against Edge in a ladder match at the Extreme Rules PPV this weekend. Jeff looks forward to a huge extreme match with the Rated-R Superstar. He’s a big fan of Vanilla Ice too. Danny’s appreciation for Jeff grew when he tried to do the Swanton Bomb during his match versus Eric Young at TNA Lockdown. As he was about to launch from the top rope Danny heard ‘You suck, that’s Jeff Hardy’s move!’ That’s Jeff’s finisher in the WWE and he once did it from 32 feet in the air. More than impressive. Insane!
8:12 – Entertainment News:
The body of American actor David Carradine, best known for the 1970s TV series "Kung Fu," was found in a hotel room closet with a rope tied to his neck and genitals, and his death may have been caused by accidental suffocation, according to Thai police. The 72-year-old actor's body was discovered Thursday in his luxury suite in a Bangkok Hotel. Police initially said they suspected suicide, though Carradine's associates had questioned that theory. The Police Lt. told reporters that Carradine was found with a rope tied around his genitals and another rope around his neck. He said, "The two ropes were tied together. It is unclear whether he committed suicide or not or he died of suffocation or heart failure." An autopsy has been completed and the results would not be ready for at least three weeks. Maybe if the Thai police were there sooner they could have unthaied him and saved him.
Poison will perform on the Tony Awards Sunday night. They'll join the cast of the multi-nominated hit musical "Rock Of Ages" which features music from the 1980's. Poison and the gang will do a medley of "Nothing But A Good Time" and "Every Rose Has Its Thorn." CBS will air the Tonys live. Shouldn't a medley have more than two songs?
Aerosmith hits the road this summer with ZZ Top and Steven Tyler and Joe Perry confirmed that the band will play the entire 1975 Toys in The Attic album every night. The tour kicks off June 10th in Missouri. Aerosmith's new album will be a Wal-Mart exclusive. No Philly date has been announced yet, but rumor has it that it’s coming very SOON. Danny likes Aerosmith, but there are a buch of songs on the album he doesn't know. And no one else does either. Danny will still see the show though.
Jane's Addiction is joining its tourmates Nine Inch Nails in raising money for a fan who needs a heart transplant. For a 1,000-dollar donation, you'll be invited to a living-room type concert from Jane's Addiction before the actual show. Only 10 guests will be allowed into this strictly VIP event on each stop of the tour. Just a heads up, some of the backstage concert will happen while Nine Inch Nails is already on stage. Both bands are helping Eric De La Cruz get a new heart. He has no health insurance and could never afford the cost of the operation. Danny has tickets to tonight's NIN/Jane's Addiction concert at the Susquehanna Bank Center. To win the tickets listeners have to Guess Who Tweeted!
I love boys from the Midwest! Ha. Although, Pittsburgh is not really the Midwest. I’m sure they’re cute there, though. Damn. :-)
A. Lance Bass
B. Perez Hilton*
C. Nicole Ritchie
It’s 17:46 o’clock here..C’mon you know that sounds pretty funny :) I mean, I failed remedial math. How am I supposed to add every time I look at the clock?! Lol it’ 0 o’clock. Haaaaaaaaa
A. Mariah Carey*
B. Lindsay Lohan
C. Megan Fox
Why exactly did Adam Lambert lost ‘Idol’? maybe it’s his song choices, maybe it’s his stage presence…maybe it’s Maybelline.
A. Eva Longoria
B. Jimmy Fallon*
C. Ashton Kutcher
Yall betta not b on my ringtone without m permission now, come on playas.
A. Snoop Dog
B. Eminem
C. Shaquille O’Neal*
9:03 – Kendra Wilkinson is on the show now. She’s got a new show, Kendra, premiering on E! soon. She’s been working with the same producers for six seasons and they allow Kendra to take stuff out of the show if she’s not comfortable with airing. Hank Baskett, her fiancé, wasn’t hot on doing the show at first, but Kendra talked him into it. She’s ready to get married and start a family with Hank, an Eagles WR. After some awkward experiences at Playboy Mansion parties Kendra doesn’t like to sleep naked. All the attention of reality came to her leading up to The Girls Next Door and she tried to keep herself grounded to make sure that she’s prepared for life after television. Danny commends her for being a bright girl and thinking of her future.
9:15 - WHO IS ARTHUR KADE??? Find out Monday at 8:45am. Philadelphia Police are searching for several suspects involved in a brazen Center City department store jewelry heist. At about 2:15 p.m. Thursday afternoon, four males wearing ski masks entered Boyds Department store on 18th and Chestnut with the intent of robbing the Govberg Jewelers store inside. Two suspects initially entered the store and sprayed mace in the face of the security guard on duty and held a gun to his head. Two other suspects entered the store, smashed the watches case with a hammer and stole approximately $500,000 worth in watches. The crime was so organized that all four suspects accomplished the crime within 28 seconds. They fled the scene in a green car, however they did recover a DNA sample from at least one suspect who left his blood on a piece of broken glass. This reminds Dany of Heat when the criminals would count time outloud to make sure they were efficient. Danny thinks unless the jewelry store wants to pursue this the guys will get away with it.
A 55-year-old Berks County woman died from swine flu Thursday, the first death from the illness in the state, the Pennsylvania Department of Health said. She had significant underlying health issues. The state has 269 confirmed cases and 101 probable cases of illness due to the virus.
Federal prosecutors have charged a man with making threats against President Barack Obama after he allegedly told a bank employee in Utah he was on a mission to kill the president. Daniel James Murray allegedly made the remark to a teller at a bank in on May 27 as he withdrew $13,000 from an account. Murray's whereabouts are unknown. A court affidavit says Murray is from New York and has recently been in California, Utah, Georgia, Oklahoma and possibly Texas. The U.S. Secret Service says Murray has at least eight registered firearms.
Surveillance cameras captured a bat-wielding, masked man entering a convenience store in New York recently. But the store's owner Mohammed Sohail never surrendered his cash. Instead, he went behind the counter and grabbed his gun, and the robber came to tears. He said he was sorry over and over again and said that he has no food, money, and job. He also said that his entire family has been hungry for weeks. Rather than call the police Mohammed, reacted with compassion rather than anger. He took $40 from his register and gave it to the man, along with some bread, and made him promise never to rob again. Minutes after giving the robber money and bread, he converted him to Islam. "He looked at me and said 'You are a very nice guy, a gentle man. I want to be a Muslim just like you." Want to be Catholic? Turn around three times and say 'Jesus is my homeboy.' Boom! You're a Catholic.
10:04 – Danny’s Final Thought: Let’s get out of here!
6:02 – Danny thinks that one of Shila’s greatest attributes is that she’s a lunatic. Danny likes him some authentic craziness, however he was alarmed to get an ordinary e-mail from Shila. She forwarded him a chain e-mail that stated his phone will ring as soon as he’s finished reading it and a wish would come true. However he didn’t read it, his fiancée Amy did. Danny never takes the bait on them, but this one was different. Shila loves chain letters. The letter worked for her and now Danny is going to call his fiancée Amy to make her wish come true. Shila thinks that Danny can’t mess with destiny. Amy wasn’t prepared and didn’t have a wish ready, so on the spot she says that she hopes Danny won’t get cancer as soon as she thinks he will. She hopes that he’s cancer-free for 10 years. Shila thinks that’s wishful thinking. So Amy wants Danny to get cancer? She thinks it’s inevitable. If Danny gets cancer he doesn’t want to linger, he wants to go quickly. He used to have a suicide kit in case he was told he was going to die, but he slowly took all the pills in the kit, rendering the kit useless. 6:36 – SPORTS: J.A. Happ pitched seven scoreless innings and allowed four hits in the Phillies' 5-1 win over San Diego, completing a three-game sweep. J.C. Romero also returned.
Eagles running back Brian Westbrook will have his second operation of the off-season. The Eagles confirmed that Westbrook would have bone spurs removed from his right ankle on Friday. A team source said the team was unsure of the recovery time. The Eagles open training camp on July 26 and the regular season on Sept. 13.
6:49 – Danny’s fiancée Amy has a slight obsessing with Rock Band. Danny prefers Wii games that keep him active, but Amy spends a lot of time playing with a plastic guitar controller. Danny doesn’t mind it some much because she’ll play in her underwear, but are there other people losing their lovers to videogames? Nathan calls to say that the average age of a videogame player has risen to 28. Danny wanted to punch Spike in the face yesterday when he said that the Beatles were overrated. That didn’t sit well with the ‘Duce. Danny looks forward to playing the Rock Band Beatles game, but there could be a rock star shred factor that isn’t realized when playing it. What other bands deserve their own games? The Who? That could lead to broken Rock Band Guitar. Other suggestions include The Ramones, Slayer, Guns n’ Roses, Tool, Nirvana, The Clash, and KISS.
7:10 – News with Shila: A Philadelphia dentist has been arrested in an alleged child pornography bust. Michael Kushner, 51, was arrested Wednesday for allegedly viewing and downloading pornographic photos of young females. According to investigators, Kushner allegedly entered pornographic sites for the purpose of viewing and downloading explicit photos of young females engaging in sexual acts. Kushner was arraigned Wednesday afternoon and is being held at the Bucks County Prison on $750,000. Shouldn’t child porn be harder to get to?
A federal TSA officer is accused of stealing electronics from luggage he was screening at Philadelphia International Airport. Federal and city prosecutors announced the indictment of 36-year-old Troy Davis of N.J., on Wednesday. Davis is accused of taking five laptop computers and a video game system. He's charged in federal court with theft from interstate or foreign shipments by carrier and theft by government employee. Shopping made easy!
A toy gun led to a campus lock-down at Princeton University Wednesday. The Ivy League New Jersey campus was locked down for about half an hour after someone reported seeing a man with a handgun. According to police, four teenagers were going through items thrown out by some students and found the toy gun. A witness saw one of them stick the fake gun into his waistband and thought it was real. The boys were taken into custody for questioning, however it appears they did not realize they would cause a panic.
Veterinarians have coined the term 'High Rise Syndrome' to refer to cats that fall out of open skyscraper windows during warm weather. During the summer, some big-city veterinary hospitals see three to five cases a week. Well, Last month in New York City, a cat named Lucky squeezed out of a window that was opened about 6 inches. Lucky climbed out onto the ledge, lost his grip, fell, and a neighbor's balcony broke his fall 26 stories. Amazingly, Lucky only suffered only minor injuries and has already made a full recovery. Who’s really lucky? The cat that didn’t fall out of a building. Danny’s ex-wife’s mother died from an 11-story fall out of a hospital. Danny thought this was suspicious, but after giving birth she was given the wrong medication and it lead to the accident.
On Monday, 21-year-old man from Washington state appeared in court on charges that he'd had sex with his two Alaskan Malamutes. To make things worse, Troy is also a "Furry. Two of Troy's "Furry" friends witnessed him violating his dogs . . . and they are the ones who turned him in. Troy has been sentenced to 30 days in jail, is restricted from owning animals for two years, and his dogs have been placed with new owners. Just call them freaks and be done with it. Danny was filming an episode of Remote Control and met a girl who was Chip or Dale at a theme park that will remain nameless. He asked her to put the chipmunk head on during sex, which she did. 7:32 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Bonnie, a very annoying woman, wants to know why men try so hard when they’re dating a girl, and then get lazy when they get married. Men work hard to get the sex and then the person they really are comes out over time. Men are scum and just want sex, and are willing to tolerate anything to get it.
Joe’s sister had her kids taken into foster care, but he rescued them. She got into drugs and Joe is in a tough spot because the kids have disabilities and he’s not capable of taking them in and caring for them correctly. Now he has to face his sister in court and doesn’t know what to say to her to get her attention. Danny tells Joe to say to the judge exactly what he just said on the air. There are people better equipped to work with these kids and prepare them for life.
7:51 – Joe Pantoliano is in the studio. Joey has a new documentary about mental illness, No Kidding, Me Too!, that he’s screening in town tonight. He was diagnosed with clinical depression and dyslexia, and also has a tattoo of ‘Isabella’ on his arm. He and Danny have a lot in common. Danny’s mom would read him the scripts leading up to a taping which helped make things easy. Things went well until the scripts didn’t show up one week and Danny had a tough time with the read through and everyone thought Danny couldn’t read. That’s when Danny found out he was dyslexic. Joey wasn’t diagnosed with dyslexia until his children were diagnosed. Joey wanted to break the stigma about mental illness after not being able to be insured on a movie because the insurance company didn’t want to insure him because of mental illness. Motivation is a real issue with depression; it’s tough to get out of the rut and often leads to dependency. No Kidding screens tonight at Friends Hospital.
8:09 – Entertainment News:
According to Forbes' annual Celebrity 100 list, Angelina Jolie is the most powerful celeb in the world, thanks to her hit movie Kung Fu Panda, as well as the constant media attention surrounding her personal life and charity work. Oprah Winfrey dropped to number two followed by Madonna, Beyonce, and golfer Tiger Woods. Jolie's partner, Brad Pitt, had to settle for number nine. President Barack Obama is the first sitting president to make the Forbes Celebrity 100 Power List, with his many magazine covers and best-selling books, coming in at No. 49 on the annual list. That’s a lot of women at the top of the list. Danny doesn’t want to hear about the glass ceiling anymore.
Eminem has finally spoken out about this weekend's MTV Movie Awards stunt in which a bare-butted Sacha Baron Cohen, as his character Bruno, fell in his lap. Em confirmed suspicion that the stunt was staged. Cohen contacted Eminem with an idea to do something outrageous at the awards and being a big fan of Cohen’s work, Eminem agreed to go along with it. Danny prefers that some mystery remains with stunts like these. Why do it if no one’s going to stick with the story?
Despite constant reports of tension on and off stage it looks like the Stone Temple Pilots will be around awhile. The group has written 18 new songs for a studio album and will probably choose the best twelve. The disc will be produced by Don Was, who worked with the Rolling Stones. Also, Scott Weiland's estranged wife Mary has written a tell-all book. "Fall To Pieces: A Memoir Of Drugs, Rock 'n' Roll and Mental Illness." It is described as a, "visceral, rollercoaster ride" inside such topics as bipolar disorder, celebrity culture, fashion modeling and drug addiction. She talks about Scott too. Look for the book in October.
Oz Fox, guitarist for Christian rockers Stryper is marrying a hooker. Oz and former prostitute Annie Lobert will tie the knot tomorrow in Las Vegas. Annie worked the streets in Vegas for 11 years and is now a founder of a Christian ministry called it Hookers For Jesus. That’s got to be all torn up! A former hooker helped Danny with his addictions and gain some clarity. Once he got sober Danny realized how annoying she was.
Paul McCartney’s ex-wife, Heather Mills, had quite the accident while shopping for groceries. Apparently, she slipped on some spilled milk, causing her artificial limb to fly off. Luckily for Mills two customers were able to recover the leg for her. She then posted on Twitter, "Two teenage boys rescued me and my leg." Danny’s glad she Twittered about this so he can make fun of the girl that broke Paul McCartney’s heart.
Dave the Foot, a fella with one leg, thinks that Heather Mills is just starving for attention. If she was on Dancing With The Stars and didn’t have a flying leg incident, then why would it happen in a supermarket? 8:31 – Who Would Win In A Fight: Cheech & Chong vs. Jay and Silent Bob
Metro goes with Cheech & Chong because they have a better track record, Jay and Silent Bob are out of shape, and Jay is a loose cannon that’s not reliable in a fight. Shila takes Jay and Silent Bob, Bob’s a genius, they were the protectors of the Chosen One in Dogma, and they beat up kids. Danny takes Jay and Silent Bob because of what Jason Mewes has survived in real life.
Mike takes Cheech & Chong because they’d fight dirty. Tom goes with Cheech & Chong because they’d offer Jay drugs and take advantage of his addiction. Chris takes Jay and Silent Bob because Bob is strong with the Force in Mallrats. John takes Jay and Silent Bob because they whipped a Jedi master’s ass. Tony takes Cheech & Chong because they’d blow smoke in Jay and Bob’s faces. Tom takes Jay and Silent Bob because Bob is a master strategist. Danny lashes out at Kevin Smith’s movies; he only liked Clerks and Chasing Amy. This winds Shila up, she’s ready to throw down.
8:48 – Danny might switch sides, the callers are making some good points and might sway him. Brent is another Cheech & Chong because Tommy spent 9 months in prison and Silent Bob is always falling through walls. Becky takes Cheech & Chong because Cheech is pretty buff and they’d shred Jay and Bob. Mike is another Cheech & Chong vote. Brick takes Jay and Silent Bob because Jay’s going go berserker Wolverine style on Cheech & Chong. Mark takes Cheech & Chong. Cheech & Chong win the phone vote, Jay and Silent Bob take the text vote for a draw. There are no winners on the Danny Bonaduce Show!
9:05 – Cheech & Chong are on the show now. Danny remembers the exact moment he found out that Cheech & Chong weren’t working together anymore. They rate right up there with Kennedy’s assassination, the moon walk, and the Beatles breaking up. Jail wasn’t as bad for Chong as it seemed. Danny thinks the charge was bogus. Chong did That 70’s Show and Cheech had a good run on Nash Bridges. Danny remembers seeing Cheech & Chong open for the Rolling Stones in 1974 at the LA Forum. After all these years why get back together? It’s what the fans wanted. Cheech has a tremendous collection of Chicano art. Tommy has the largest Chicano collection because he has Cheech. They just got back from a month of shows in Australians. Not a lot of Mexicans there. The Australians are like Canadians plus four beers. They once did a show in Indiana that had 500,000 people in attendance. They’re going to be at the Borgata this Saturday. Danny plans to be in attendance, it’s almost mandatory that he relapses if he goes.
9:30 – News with Shila:
Philadelphia Police continue to look for the driver who struck and killed a woman on the Roosevelt Boulevard near Rising Sun Avenue in the city's Feltonville section. Police have identified the victim as Brenda Rodriguez, 36. Rodriguez was reportedly out picking up Chinese takeout when she was struck attempting to cross the Boulevard shortly after midnight Wednesday. Police said the car that hit her was drag racing another car, and was likely traveling around 70 miles per hour. Police say they are looking for a gold or tan car, possibly an Oldsmobile from the 90's, with some front end damage to the hood and damage to the windshield. She was the mother of five, she had six grandchildren.
Facebook users accounts are getting hacked and infected with Trojan viruses. Most of us know by now not to open mail from people we don’t know, but what if it's from someone you do know? That’s what’s hackers are now doing. They are getting into the Facebook accounts and stealing identities from your Facebook friends and sending malicious software that will make your computer inoperable. These hackers are also stealing other personal information from the computer. Facebook officials know about the Facebook hijackings and are taking proper precautions.
New Hampshire became the sixth state to legalize gay marriage Wednesday in a move that reflects the state's changing demographics from reliably Republican and conservative to younger and more liberal. The Senate and House passed key language on religious rights, Gov. John Lynch — who personally opposes gay marriage — signed the legislation Wednesday afternoon. Lynch, a Democrat, had promised a veto if the law didn't clearly spell out that churches and religious groups would not be forced to officiate at gay marriages or provide other services. Legislators made the changes.
Fire investigators concluded that a fast-moving blaze that destroyed a topless coffee shop in Maine was deliberately set. The fire was reported just before 1 a.m. by an ambulance that happened to be driving past. It took about 50 firefighters from eight communities to douse it. The Owner escaped unharmed along with six others. At the shop, waiters and waitresses without shirts served coffee and doughnuts. The owner spent $277,000 buying and renovating the former motel. It wasn't insured. The Topless coffee chop brought mixed reactions to the community, some were sad to see it go. Others were not.
9:53 – Danny never texted while riding his motorcycle, but sometimes he’ll take a call on the bike. He wedges the phone in his helmet. The Bluetooth earpiece hurts too much to wear constantly.
6:02 – Danny has a huge Jesus belt buckle today. He may have seen a giant Jesus on the way back from Mike’s Famous Harley Davidson Delaware over the weekend. Calls come in confirming that it could be a giant Jesus statue then public opinion sways and decides it’s a Mary statue. It’s a little ambiguous. Yesterday on his way home from work Danny saw a little girl’s life change forever. Usually he’ll get recognized on the street, but it’s awkward when school teachers on Old City tours recognize Danny and insist that kids who don’t know who he is get their photographs with Danny. Yesterday while going through the routine again a young girl bent over and blew chunks on the street, which turned out to be embarrassing for her. It was a life defining moment for the girl who probably won’t be able to outlive the memory of the being the girl that ralphed on a field trip to Philadelphia.
6:13 – When Shila was young her mother parted her hair down the middle, pulled into pigtails tied with pretty bows. Shila was known as Butt Cutt until the 8th grade. She also had her hair shaved off when going into the first grade for religious reasons which confused the other kids in class who thought she was a boy with earrings or a cancer patient. In high school Butt Cutt changed to Pocahontas. What was Danny’s traumatic youth experience? Being Danny Partridge? Maybe it was making a girl puke in Old City yesterday. 6:35 – SPORTS: Antonio Bastardo might have been aided by a four-run first inning, but the 23-year-old lefthander exceeded any realistic expectations as the Phillies beat the Padres 10-5.
Sheldon Brown decided this was the time and place to display his contract discontent. After verbally going public with his unhappiness about his contract situation in April, the Eagles' cornerback still showed up for the team's mandatory post-draft camp. He did not report for the start of the Eagles' eight-day voluntary camp.
6:46 – Danny watched a lot of television yesterday and one show that stuck out was the President Obama on NBC. He likes a president that represents freedom and can go out on a date, rather than a captive of the White House. He also thought it was cool that Obama took lunch orders during the special last night. Obama also critiqued Saturday Night Live parodies and pointed out the cadence of his voice and the size of his ears were not properly represented.
Danny also watched a special on the impending doom or earth called Earth 2100. Melting icebergs will eat up huge sections of land, then infectious disease will spread faster and civilization will spin out of control. The point of no return is 2015. Danny became a believer of global warming when seeing the extreme precautions that people went through while going to the beach in Australia. He does believe that it will cause the end of the life on earth, but not in his lifetime. Maybe the future generations aren’t worth saving, we haven’t seen them yet.
7:06 – News with Shila:
Police have arrested a 'person of interest' in connection to the rape of an 11 year old girl who was viciously attacked on her way to school in Kensington earlier this week. 26-year-old Jose Carrasquillo was taken into custody at about 3:30 p.m. Tuesday after being spotted by neighbors. Authorities said a group of proactive citizens recognized Carrasqiullo from news reports and forcibly detained him until the police arrived. Jose is listed in critical condition. One vigilante said, "I was in tears because it was a real powerful moment. I have a daughter and I wouldn't want that to be my child." As long as the right guy was caught Danny’s cool with the beatdown.
The remnants of the missing Air France plane were found in the Atlantic Ocean yesterday. According to the Brazilian Air Force, an airplane seat, an orange buoy, metallic debris and signs of fuel were spotted about 700 miles northeast of Brazil's coast. The plane had 228 people onboard, including an American couple. The flight departed Sunday night from Rio de Janeiro heading to Paris. There have been no sightings of survivors. What caused the plane to vanish is still not clear, except that the plane entered an area with severe thunderstorms.
There is some controversy at a Kansas school after a teacher shaved the head of a 6-year-old boy because of his haircut, a short Mohawk. School officials said that Derby McReynolds’s haircut was unacceptable, and sent him home. His parents complied and trimmed the boy's hair to what they said resembled a military cut. But apparently that wasn’t enough; the principal had a faculty member shave the boy's head the next time he returned to school. The school district says that they are trying to balance the student's individual right of expression with the expectations of the teachers, of parents and other students. He’s lucky he didn’t have a butt cut. Danny will decide what his kid wears to school and what they look like. That shouldn’t be up to the faculty.
A Pennsylvania man asked a judge to perform his wedding ceremony during his own criminal trial! Timothy Zalut, 20, was standing trial on assault charges and awaiting his sentence. When he realized he might be going to jail, he decided it would be a good time to marry his fiancee, Hayley Dykstra. Zalut made the request while the jury was deliberating. The Judge agreed to perform the ceremony in chambers while the jury was still out. If Danny was the woman he wouldn’t have married the dude.
A man in Portsmouth, New Hampshire was arrested for the 153rd time Sunday, just one week after being released from prison for stealing a can of beer. 49 year old Paul Baldwin’s criminal history has included eight trespass notices, 75 citations, four Social Security aliases and convictions for thefts, receiving stolen property, arson and criminal mischief. In May 2008, he even told a judge, "I don’t need a lawyer. I’ve been in this court more than you have." Who needs to feel ashamed? That guy or the judicial system that let him free 152 times? 7:27 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Beth is 45 and tries to lose weight, but just can’t seem to jumpstart her life to do it. Danny lost 40 pounds before he bulked up. Beth has 75 lbs. of excess weight. That’s morbidly obese. Danny asks her to get a get a heart rate monitor to gauge her target heart rate and just try to extend her workouts by 30 seconds. Danny worked hard to constantly progress his running by just a few feet every day and was able to take on six miles a day. Small meals and calorie counting works.
Jeff is 24 and is struggling to put on body mass. Lift heavy, 6-8 reps; work the legs as well as the upper body. There are also weight gainer supplements that help too. Go easy on cardio, heavy on weights.
Sean’s girlfriend went to an adult toy party and she’s getting too friendly with her new device privately. Sean has to let his girlfriend know that it hurts his feelings that she’s picking to toys over him when he’s interested in sharing them with her.
Dave is having trouble with his daughter and his girlfriend. After investing 16 years in the relationship he feels caught between his girlfriend and his girl. He should have dumped the girlfriend 16 years ago. Now the two adult women need to work it out. Dave is the victim now and needs to step back and see who’s willing to bite the bullet and put some effort forth. 7:51 – Vera Ramone-King, Dee Dee Ramone’s ex-wife is on the phone. She re-married after their divorce, but she a book about her life with Dee Dee, Poisoned Heart: I Married Dee Dee Ramone. He split from the band because he wanted to break the mold and try something new, but Joey and Johnny weren’t willing to change the formula. Dee Dee’s next project was a rap album, but he was asked to change his stage name so the Ramones name wasn’t connected to it. The Hollywood Forever cemetery, where Dee Dee and Johnny are buried is a very interesting place. Who owns the Ramones logo? That’s in litigation at the moment. The old drummers are fighting over it, but Vera gave up any rights to it long ago. Vera thinks that Dee Dee could have given Ozzy a run for his money in the reality television world. Dee Dee had worked hard at getting clean before OD’ing on heroin. She thought that at some point he’d kill himself with drugs, but it’s still hard for her to talk about it.
8:09 – Entertainment News:
Eddie Van Halen is slamming his former bass player. Eddie said that Michael Anthony claims he found out he was fired from Van Halen on the Internet and that Eddie's son Wolfgang would take his place the band's 2007 reunion tour with David Lee Roth. However Eddie says Michael was gone from the band way before that when he decided to quit and follow Sammy Hagar out the door. Once the reunion was announced, Eddie says Michael wanted back in, but it was too late. Michael Anthony is now part of Chickenfoot with Sammy Hagar, guitarist Joe Satriani and Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith. Their debut album will be in stores on Friday. The band should be called turkey neck with the way they’re looking these days.
YouTube sensation Susan Boyle recently was admitted into a clinic for exhaustion after coming in second on Britain's Got Talent. The 48-year-old Scottish singer collapsed at her hotel after the finale, mumbling something about missing her cat Pebbles. Susan's condition has led to criticism that producers of the show didn't do enough to prevent it. Should Susan have been allowed to compete after the erratic behavior she showed in the week leading up to the finale? One of the producers admits that contestants are not psychologically tested but they are planning to review that policy and possibly make some changes in the future. Danny doesn’t need a psychological test to know she’s crazy.
It appears after the first episode of ‘I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here’, that Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt have apparently decided to quit the show for good. Just before quitting, Spencer reportedly told producers, "If you give me a script, I'll do what you want. I'm not a reality star. I'm on The Hills." He then corrected himself and explained, "I'm a TV producer and a character." Meanwhile, it is rumored that Daniel Baldwin will join little brother Stephen in Costa Rica for the show. And reports are claiming that Heidi's sister Holly might replace her. Now after all this craziness, Heidi and Spencer sent an email to EXTRA claiming they want back on the show. "We’re begging NBC to let us back in!" he wrote. After a while a guilty pleasure turns into being guilty of bad taste. Danny's admiration for Spencer is growing.
8:31 – F My Life!
Metro got in his first fight this weekend…with a homeless man. The homeless man is fine, Metro’s chest is a little tender. F My Life!
TJ took a new job and got laid off after 4 months. F My Life!
Ken got divorce papers and foreclosure papers in the same month. F My Life!
Sam went to wrong way on 95 and ended up in Maryland. F My Life!
Sean went drinking one night and now has a wife and kids 5 years later. F My Life!
Earlier this week Danny made fun of the Philadelphia Firebirds, a women’s football team. Now they’re in the lobby ready to made amends. F My Life!
8:51 – The Philadelphia Firebirds are in the studio. Danny’s memory is a little hazy. He just can’t seem to recall saying that women’s football is not a sport and that he could singlehandedly take on the team and win because they’re just girls. After seeing them in real life he thinks they’d kick his ass. The Firebirds have one more home game left this Saturday. They play NFL, but with smaller balls and college rules for receivers. They aren’t any protective cups in their league though. The do wear chest pads to flatten out the boobs. Jack, the head coach of the team calls in to express his joy with coaching the ladies. Their last home game is this Saturday against the Pittsburgh Passion. The ladies invite Danny to a practice so he can experience some full contact fun.
9:07 – Metro is upset with Danny because he’s worked with Mark Hamill and didn’t tell him. Mark was on an episode of the Partridge Family in which Laurie’s braces would pick up radio waves. Danny was also in Corvette Summer with Mark Hamill and Annie Potts, a movie about a supercharged Corvette. This doesn’t sit well with Metro because he’s a tremendous Star Wars fan.
Kathy Gunterman, Danny’s stalk has naked photos of Danny? It’s not uncommon to see a naked Danny. She created them with magazine photos and tape. Kathy says she also has a video of Danny and Gretchen, but not a home sex tape. Greg calls to say that Kathy sounds like Danny putting on a voice, not the case.
9:34 – News with Shila:
Delaware State Police have arrested a high school teacher for allegedly having a sexual relationship with a 10th grade student. John O. Thompson, 26, was arrested Tuesday afternoon at Sussex Central High School after two students told school administrators about the relationship. According to investigators, the sexual assault occurred at Thompson's residence and his car. Thompson was arraigned and his bail was set at $5,500 secured for his appearance in the Court of Common Pleas for Sussex County for a preliminary hearing. Unless you’re a sexual predator how could you be this stupid? Every week there are new reports about teacher preying on students. With cell phones and other technology you’re bound to get caught.
General Motors struck a tentative deal to sell its Hummer brand to a Chinese manufacturer and also revealed that it has potential buyers for its Saab and Saturn brands. GM said the sale will likely save more than 3,000 U.S. jobs in manufacturing, engineering and at various Hummer dealerships. The automaker also said that it has 16 buyers interested in purchasing its Saturn brand, while three parties are interested in the Swedish Saab brand. GM will also phase out its Pontiac brand, in an effort to remake itself into a smaller, more viable business.
The next time you step in front of the camera for your driver’s license photo, you might want to skip the forced smile. Four states have urged drivers to stop smiling because it interferes with anti-fraud protections on driver’s license pictures. Arkansas, Indiana, Nevada and Virginia are telling drivers to keep neutral expressions when they get their license photos taken. The states are using software that compares new license photos with old ones. Grinning can mess up the facial recognition technology. Thirty-one states use computers to compare license photos. But most of them say their software works, smile or no smile. There are no reasons to smile Arkansas or Indiana. In California drivers have to put their thumb print on the back of their license, but in Danny’s case it was just another photo of his face.
A 28-year old British woman has set a world record for endurance by supporting her entire body weight using just her mouth. The woman held herself for over 30 seconds in something called the Marinelli Bend, which is apparently one of the basic skills for a contortionist. Iona bit down on a mouth piece while lying face down and then bending herself backward until her both of her legs were resting on the back of her head. She then held herself in that position for 33 seconds . . . which was 11 seconds longer than the previous record. A woman supporting herself with just her mouth? HOT!
6:02 – There’s a mouse in the office and it scared Shila and Metro. The rodent was roaming around Jeff the Program Director’s office and was trapped last night. Their imagination is running wild, which blows Danny’s mind. There’s no zombie mice on the 9th floor of 400 Market Street. Maybe this is Mickey’s revenge for Shila’s anti-Disney tirade the other day. Danny wants to go get the mouse and toss it in a dumpster. He can’t kill it on the radio because that’s inhumane. Is he worried about rabies? Not really. Danny takes his cell phone and walks into the office to handle the small furry friend. He picks it up and walks it into the studio. It squeeks and Metros squeels. Shila’s ice cold heart is starting to melt. Danny plans to take it outside and liberate it during the commercial break. 6:31 – Danny has returned from saving Philadelphia from the terrifying mouse. Danny hopes to have photos posted on the site, but he wants to get permission from the boss because other radio hosts have been fired for what was perceived as cruelty to animals on the air.
6:36 – SPORTS: Chase Utley and Ryan Howard hit consecutive home runs in the fifth inning and Philadelphia beat Adrian Gonzalez and the San Diego Padres 5-3 on Monday night, the Phillies' fourth straight win.
The Eagles are inviting singers from across the Mid-Atlantic region to participate in open call National Anthem auditions at Lincoln Financial Field from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. this Sunday. Danny stands like a Marine at movie theaters and in his own home while the national anthem plays.
6:49 – Danny was a little wound up about Jonny Fairplay and Mancow yesterday. Everything was evened out yesterday when he was watching Fox 29 and he came in second on the greatest reality show meltdowns for Breaking Bonaduce. But then he got wound up again after John Bolaris didn’t mention that he sees Danny every day and works next door to him. Bolaris took it up a notch when he gave a snooty answer about not watching reality television. Danny was beat out for the top spot on the countdown by Joan Rivers on Celebrity Apprentice this year. Then he flipped over to E! and was on another list for most shocking moments on television. Two a-hole moments in one day? GREAT!
7:35 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Matt wants a motorcycle, but has bad credit. The answer? Go see the nice people at Mike’s Famous Harley Davidson, they’re easy to work with.
Andrew’s credit is shot and can’t afford to buy a ring for the woman of his dreams that he wants to marry. Danny alerts him to the subject of yesterday’s show, dreams aren’t reality. Save your penis. Jeweler’s can’t afford to not sell their product.
Kelly left her husband and then moved in with another man. Essentially she’s the new guy’s wife without sex, the problem is one day he’s calling her his girlfriend and the next he’s asking him to help him set up online dating profiles and dates with other women. She’s ready to move on to the next level, but she just needs to move on. Bringing kids is some heavy baggage in a new relationship. He’s just not that in to you.
7:51 – Danny whips out an article about women who want to minimize their carbon footprint while enhancing their pleasure. Danny thinks that the solar paneled vibrators should be used on rooftops across the city. Whips made of recycled tires. Vegan condoms made without milk proteins found in the latex ones. Candles that turn into massage oils. Conflict free condoms that help benefit rubber tree workers in poor countries. Danny is NOT a fan of edible panties. They just don’t work out the way he wants them too. Shila likes flavored body oils. Danny’s not into chocolate flavored hoozits.
8:07 – Entertainment News:
Conan O'Brien debuted as host of The Tonight Show Yesterday with a "run" across the country to Los Angeles and other comedy bits emphasizing his entry into a strange new culture. Will Ferrell offered O'Brien some "tips" for L.A. living, including a good burger joint in Pasadena "called Burger King." Ferrell sang his own song in tribute to O'Brien, a version of "Never Can Say Goodbye" that bewildered the host. Why sing a goodbye song on the first night? "Don't get me wrong," Ferrell said. "I'm pulling for you. But this little thing is a crapshoot at best."
Pearl Jam will release its new album exclusively through Target. Billboard.com says it's called "Backspacer" and will be out in the fall and a single will be hitting radio next month. The band's longtime manager Kelly Curtis confirmed that Pearl Jam shot a TV commercial for Target last week at Seattle's Showbox theater, directed by Cameron Crowe. Pearl Jam was on Conan O'Brien's last night for the debut of the Tonight Show and played one new song, which may or may not be called "The Fixer," and may or may not be the first single. Kelly went on to confirm that Pearl Jam will tour once the new album is released. That's a whole bunch of may or maybe nots.
Sir Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr unveiled "The Beatles: Rock Band" video game yesterday in Los Angeles. 45 Beatle songs will be on the game disc when it's released on September 9th, along with a limited edition set of custom guitar, bass and drum controllers. "All You Need Is Love" will be available as a download for the XBox-360 with all proceeds going to Doctors Without Borders. And, the entire "Abbey Road" album will also be available for purchase as a download for the game. More songs will be added after September 9th, which is also the day all the stereo and mono Beatles remastered CDs are released. Yesterday Amy preordered the game, which makes Danny nuts. Why sell stuff you can’t buy? Last night Danny woke up to Amy playing Guitar Hero: Metallica in her underwear in an attempt to get the high score in all the songs.
NBC's I'm a Celebrity ... Get Me Out of Here! show premiered last night. The nightly competition show starts in the jungles of Costa Rica, with semi-famous people vying for food, supplies and money for their favorite charities — not to mention...there will also be a King and Queen of the Jungle. But judging from Monday's debut, most of the action is fighting and eating bugs. Actor Stephen Baldwin, pro wrestler Torrie Wilson and former Illinois first lady Patti Blagojevich are among the show's 11 contenders. So are lovey-dovey and annoying newlyweds Spencer and Heidi Pratt. Another show Danny was asked to be on. He doesn’t like Spencer so much. Shila can’t stand them either.
Jimi Hendrix was murdered. That's what his former roadie, James "Tappy" Wright claims in a new tell-all book called "Rock Roadie." The UK's Sun tabloid says Tappy writes that Jimi's manager Michael Jeffrey confessed to visiting the guitarist at his London hotel and filling him up with pills and alcohol. It had to look like an accidental death, not a suicide, or Michael would not have been able to collect on the 2-million-dollar insurance police he took out on Jimi. The official cause of death in September of 1970 was "barbituate intoxication and inhalation of vomit," but even the surgeon who tried to revive Jimi that night said there wasn't much of the massive amount of red wine in his bloodstream that he supposedly consumed. Michael Jeffrey allegedly made his confession a year after Jimi died. Michael died in a plane crash in 1973. So anyone that could confirm this is dead. 8:42 – There are certain bad movies that Danny can’t pass up when he comes across them on cable television. Vision Quest and The Firm stop him in his tracks. Shila’s movie is Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason. Metro zones in on Mean Girls.
Chris calls to say that Kingpin is his must watch movie. Danny loves Road House and Road Warrior. The original Mad Max had Mel Gibson overdubbed with another actor’s voice. Shila’s never seen Road House or The Big Lebowski. Ed digs Caddyshack, Danny used to like it too, but Rodney Dangerfield wore thin on him. Jeff’s movie is The Outlaw Josie Wales with Clint Eastwood. Danny also digs Jeremiah Johnson with Robert Redford and The Quick and the Dead with Sharon Stone and Leonardo DiCaprio. Tom can’t click past Braveheart. Joey loves Angelheart with Mickey Rourke. TJ is a big fan of Rudy. Eric’s pick is the greatest movie ever made, POINT BREAK. Danny’s not a fan of the manners of surfers, they’re very rude, even if you’re not on their beach. Tom likes Ladder 49 with John Travolta.
9:09 – Viewer Mail!
Karen writes in about Danny’s grill tips in the Art of Manliness yesterday. She rules the grill in her house because her husband burns steaks and she has her own grill tools. Danny said that no woman should touch a man’s grill tools, but if she has her own, that’s cool. Karen’s husband is dead to Danny because he has no grill skills.
Denise writes in to let Danny know that she does not like Gretchen’s new show. Also Denise used to hear her mother and her stepfather make lots of noise in the bedroom and it occurred to her that her mother was faking. She’s learned to be a faker about it.
Brenda writes to ask Danny what kind of person he’d be if he wasn’t famous and outspoken. He’d be quiet and anonymous. She wants to see Danny for her birthday, but she’s in Arizona. What line of work interests Danny? Hair dresser. He wants to be like Warren Beatty in Shampoo.
Amy writes in to suggest show segment where Shila tries to pronounce difficult words. WINNER! ‘That’s Easy For You To Say.’ She has to use the words in the sentence.
Lemon meringue pie. Se got it right.
Danny’s an ab small. It’s abysmal.
I’m part of the borgeese class. It’s bourgeoisie.
9:35 – News with Shila:
The FBI and the Philadelphia Police Department are searching for the man who robbed a Wachovia Bank branch and injured a customer. Investigators say the man entered the bank with a gun, struck a customer in the head with the weapon, and jumped over the teller counter.
A kindergartner's mother cannot read Scripture during show and tell, even if the Bible is the boy's favorite book, a U.S. appeals court said Monday in the latest challenge over religion in public schools. The Marple Newtown School District in suburban Philadelphia told plaintiff Donna Kay Busch in October 2004 that she could not read the Bible passages during her son's "All About Me" program. The school did permit the boy to discuss a poster that included references to his church as well as his family, pet and best friend. It would be a problem if the kid couldn’t read, but if his favorite book is the bible then let him read it. Danny used to read Danny And The Dinosaur for his kids at school. It gave him a great opportunity to scare kids while holding their attention.
9:56 – Danny and Spike get into a discussion about Ronnie James Dio. It was Dio that introduced the metal hand salute m/ so that he didn’t do the peace sign like Ozzy when replacing Black Sabbath.
6:02 – Danny has a black eye and his sack hurts. This weekend Shila went to a graduation/engagement party. Danny never really had to prepare himself to ask a woman to marry him. Both asked both of his wives to marry him the day he met them. Danny thinks it’s all downhill after the wedding. The shine starts to fade. Danny prefers dangerous weddings so that every day after is better. Danny went to the Harley Days of May giveaway on Saturday and had a great time. Then he woke up with a black eye and a aching sack, but there’s no great story behind it. The sack could have come from riding his motorcycle, but the black eye has no explanation. Maybe there was a stacking of the balls that caused the pain.
6:12 – When Danny got to work this morning he was greeted with audio from his ex-wife’s new reality show. He has no interest in promoting a television show he’s not getting paid for. All she does on the show is talk about Danny though. There are phone calls that he’s never had with her that turn up on the show. 6:38 – SPORTS: Jamie Moyer went six strong innings to win his 250th career game, and the Philadelphia Phillies won their third straight, 4-2 over the bumbling Washington Nationals on Sunday.
Orlando is evaluating the All-Star point guard Jameer Nelson for a possible return to the Magic lineup for the NBA finals, which begin Thursday in Los Angeles against the Lakers.
6:47 – Danny’s tired of people he knows to be cowards and scum making headlines for not being cowards and scum. First up is Jonny Fairplay who’s coming to town for a celebrity boxing match and is only interested in boxing someone under 150 lbs. with no experience in the ring. That means he doesn’t want to fight Danny. One headlines offers the chance to ‘Pull a Bonaduce.’ What does that mean? To some it means punching someone, to others it means drinking a gallon of vodka and cranberry juice, and to some it means arguing with your girlfriend. Danny’s certain that Michael Lohan is going to destroy Fairplay unless it’s a setup.
Another person from Danny’s past, Mancow, a radio host from Chicago, made headlines for undergoing water boarding on the air. Danny’s got a long and glorious past with Mancow that involves lawsuits, thrown punches, and verbally attacking disabled children on the air. Danny told him that he crossed the line by going after someone’s disabled kid and Danny let him know that it didn’t sit well with him a day of reckoning would come. That day did come in a parking lot when Danny stepped up to him and Mancow pulled a woman into the line of fire to hide behind. Danny said some harsh words to his girlfriend to draw Mancow out, but he didn’t budge. ‘Honor? What year do you think it is? Like honor has an expiration date!’ Then something happened that Danny can’t get into. This is the American Hero that sat through 4 seconds of water boarding.
7:07 – News with Shila:
Police believe a large group of young adults went on a destructive rampage early Sunday morning in South Philadelphia. According to police the large group started assaulting and robbing several people on the 1000 block of Broad Street at about 12:30 a.m. The unruly teens then entered a Sunoco station and vandalized the store. Police said there appears to be no motive behind the destruction and are hoping surveillance cameras will aid in their investigation.
A Pennsylvania woman accused in an abduction hoax that ended in Florida and involved her 9-year-old daughter will stay with relatives following her release from a county prison, her lawyer said. Bonnie Sweeten, 38, must be supervised when she visits her children as a condition of her bail, attorney Louis R. Busico said in Sunday's editions of The Philadelphia Inquirer and the Bucks County Courier Times. She has two other daughters, ages 15 years and 8 months. Sweeten was released from the Bucks County Correctional Facility in suburban Philadelphia on Saturday after posting $100,000 in cash, or 10 percent of her $1 million bail. Risk of flight determines the bail. Danny’s highest bail was $50,000.
Millvina Dean, who as a baby was wrapped in a sack and lowered into a lifeboat in the frigid North Atlantic, died Sunday, having been the last survivor of 1912 sinking of the RMS Titanic. She was 97 years old, and she died where she had lived — in Southampton, England, the city her family had tried to leave behind when it took the ship's ill-fated maiden voyage, bound for America.
A 65-year-old Chinese woman, who suffered from chronic headaches for years, lived for more than four decades with a bullet lodged in her face. Doctors made the startling discovery after Huo Guoying went to a local hospital for an X-ray, London’s Daily Telegraph reported Wednesday. The X-rays revealed a 1.3-inch long bullet in the side of her face next to her ear. The woman later recalled being injured during China's Cultural Revolution in 1967 when someone fired a pistol next to her head during a protest, according to the report. Danny popped a pimple once and the head of a screw was under his skin. Danny took a hit from a friend of his once and ended up with a diamond in his face which is now a bump in his chin. 7:34 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Carl cheated on his wife years ago and left his wife for an affair. Then he returned to his wife, but still thinks about the affair woman still. Danny’s been through this. He didn’t have much sex with his wife, but Gretchen couldn’t compete with the sex crazed girlfriend because Gretchen had to take care of Danny’s kids too. The affair wasn’t real, the dream girl had an advantage because she didn’t have to do the dirty work.
Mike came home from a weekend in the mountains to find his girlfriend with his dad. What does he do? Get rid of the girl, high five the father, and move on. Danny’s gotten this call a few times. It’s crossed Danny’s mind that at some point his daughter will have cute friends and in order to be good he’d have to lock himself in his room. If there’s a feeling of betrayal then talk it out. Otherwise bond over it.
7:50 – Danny is wound over the newest episode of his ex-wife’s new reality show. There are some inconsistencies. In the first segment Gretchen is tearing Danny apart, which upsets their daughter Isabella. Gretchen then tries to explain to her that she’s not bashing Danny. However it still made the air and he’s also not happy that Gretchen is using the children on the air. The second segment involves Danny trying to bait Gretchen’s boyfriend Kevin into a boxing match over gold coins. That’s not how it went down. Danny wants her to be her own person and not tarnish his name. It also makes her look like a bad mother. He’s alarmed at the downward spiral she’s gone down since the divorce. If Danny is the only selling point of Gretchen’s show it needs to be Danny’s show.
8:13 – Smokin’ Joe Frazier is in the studio and Danny is excited. Does it bother Smokin’ Joe that he’s always associated with Ali? They had some amazing battles and Joe doesn’t want to put him down, but Joe had a prolific career of his own. Joe had a bone crushing right hook. The weekend of June 12th Joe is hosting ‘Champs and Stars’ show at Bally’s in Atlantic City to benefit Gilda’s Club, a cancer charity. Lots of celebrities and retired boxers will be there to support Joe and play game shows with him, all for a good cause.
8:29 – The Art of Manliess: The Right Way to Grill
1. Get the right tools. Never let a woman touch your grill either.
2. Clean the grill. Don’t turn it off when the meat is cooked. Leave it on because fire is the world’s greatest cleaner.
3. Heat is your friend. Raise the grill to fit more charcoal in so it the grill is warmer and so the meat doesn’t taste like lighter fluid.
4. Make oil your friend. Pam is a great way to make sure the meat doesn’t stick to the grill and it’s also a fantastic lighter fluid.
5. Don’t add barbecue sauce while the meat is on the grill. Before or after. Not during.
6. Know your perfect steak. Meat thermometers are sacrilege.
8:50 – Entertainment News:
Jay Leno ended his final "Tonight Show" on Friday not with a surprise guest or a selection of his vintage comedy bits, but with what he called "the greatest thing we’ve ever done." He had an onstage parade of the children — 68 in all — who had been born to people who had met because they worked on the program. Danny thought this was completely cheesy. One kid shy of an easy joke. Gretchen went into labor when Danny was on the Tonight Show, so Dante could be number 69.
The MTV Movie Awards were handed out last night and big shocker, the big winner was Twilight, which took home five awards. The big controversy of the night came when Sacha Baron Cohen, dressed as Bruno, dropped down into the audience and landed bare-assed on Eminem's head. Em was apparently furious and stormed out, although as of now there's no word on whether he was truly mad or in on the joke. Danny thinks that it’s not a good call to land on Eminem bare-assed.
Robert DeNiro's famous line in "Taxi Driver" may have been stolen from Bruce Springsteen. The E Street Band's longtime sax player Clarence Clemmons was at the Book Expo in New York City last week, plugging his memoirs, which will be out in the fall, and said DeNiro fessed up when Clarence was showing him how to play the instrument properly for his role in the movie, "New York, New York." The Big Man says Dinero revealed that he borrowed Travis Bickle's catch phrase from seeing Springsteen answer the crowd's cheers of "Bruuuuuuuuce" at a concert with, "You talkin' to me?" Danny loved Taxi Driver, but thought that Heat was an awful film.
9:08 – After a discussion about proposals and weddings Danny found a few news stories about weddings going wrong. First up is a Taiwanese man who spend three years of savings on his wedding day and had some awful reaction to something that turned his face black and then killed him. All for trying to make his wedding day the best day of his life.
A Bollywood star was courting a Russian dancer and followed her to her home town. He was a star and now he cleans the streets of a Russian town for pennies a day. Love does not conquer all. Danny thinks that people set themselves up for disaster when they put so much importance on their wedding day.
Shila thinks there’s a huge difference between the girl who wants a huge diamond and a girl who wants a good size ring and doesn’t want to live as a pauper. Shila and Danny agree that weddings shouldn’t break the bank. Danny prefers eloping though.Greek, Chinese, Italian, or African he thinks that all weddings are outlandish. Don’t have your best day be yesterday.
9:33 – News with Shila:
Police are investigating a murder-suicide overnight at a bar in the city's Kensington section. Police say an unidentified man walked into "Sammy's Bar" around 2:15am, shot his 56-year old wife, and then shot himself.
Dave calls to say he works with one of the lady football players. She’s an archeologist. Danny would rather see her compete against Indiana Jones. Danny challenges the Firebirds to a game. He wants to get tackled by boobs.
General Motors Corp. filed for bankruptcy Monday as part of an Obama administration plan to shrink the automaker to a sustainable size and give a majority ownership stake to the federal government. Albert Koch, who helped Kmart Corp. through its Chapter 11 reorganization, will serve as GM's chief restructuring officer. Danny was contemplating buying stock in GM because he believes it has to go up.
A man who has fathered 21 children with 11 different women yesterday claimed that he was "done" having children. Desmond Hatchett's extraordinary brood came to light after authorities in Tennessee took the 29-year-old to court for non-payment of child support. Mr Hatchett has apparently set a US record but denied he had set out to claim a place in history. "It just happened," he said. Mr Hatchett said he would not have any more children. "I'm done. I'll say I'm done," he said, shaking his head.
9:58 – Danny’s Final Thought: It’s all up hill from here. Stay in love, just save the dough.
6:01 – The studio looks a little different today and Danny’s not sure why. Metro cleaned. The weight of Danny’s boxing title belts destroyed the Rocky cardboard stand-up that was hanging out in the studio. Of the tree stand-ups in the studio, Rocky, a Star Wars storm trooper, and some chick in a bikini Metro is most attracted to the storm trooper. Shila wants a stand-up that represents her, maybe a Michael Jackson one. Danny took his daughter Isabella to South Street and discovered how much it’s changed and ended up at some cool shops in the area, like 
6:38 – SPORTS: The Phillies announced late last night that they had 
7:31 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
6:40 – SPORTS: 
6:01 – Yesterday was an odd day for Danny. Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson passed away. Farrah’s first speaking role on television was on an episode of The Partridge Family and Danny went to high school with Michael. They’ve known each other since the age of five, so Danny’s phone has been ringing non-stop with people wanting to talk about Michael. Shila was in tears of Michael Jackson last night. Danny’s glad that he wasn’t Michael because he was hounded to death. Danny thinks it’s half-murder, half-suicide. It wasn’t at the hands of another person, but from the constant pressure and panic brought on by the public. Danny never got on the child molestation band wagon because it was illogical to him. However Michael did lose control of his world and walked around with target on his back. He learned a valuable lesson from Michael when his daughter Isabella had a slumber party where Danny was the only parent in the house. So rather than risk incorrect accusations, he brought another adult to the house. Shila’s sad that Michael didn’t go out on top; she always looked up to him. Danny does cite Michael as the greatest entertainer of his generation. 
6:38 – SPORTS: Last night, the winds of an unpredictable draft again were blowing favorably for the Sixers. Then fortune stepped in. 
7:31 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
9:01 – It’s time for another shot at the Naked Weather Woman. Today’s guest is Sukie. She’s a good looking girl who’s skilled at baking with alcohol. Today’s Naked Weather Woman will have the title of Bartender added to it today because it’s Friday. She takes off the shirt. She’s 5’3”, thin and carrying around some full D cups. She’s got a pierced bellybutton she got while bonding with a stranger while on vacation with her family. She’s done the weather and made drinks for the show. She makes a strong drink. She brought in rum cake for the show too. Danny will be able to have his cake and eat it too. 
6:01 – There’s a bowl of Bonaduce idiocy that we can pick from today. Danny walked home yesterday and forgot that he rode his motorcycle to work in the morning. It’s safe and sound, he checked in on it on the way to work today. Danny wanted to spend some time with his son Dante yesterday, but he didn’t want to give up the videogames. So he put Dante on Amy’s scooter and drove him around the city. After showing Dante the William Penn statue on top of City Hall at an angle that looks like Billy Penn is holding his wang Danny was scolded by a driver for driving Dante around the city on a scooter. Things got wordy and Danny told the guy that Dante is his son and he’ll kill him how he wants to. Danny pulled over ready to fight the guy after a war of words when Dante was the voice of reason. 
7:33 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
8:33 – Who Would Win In A Fight: Godzilla vs. Optimus Prime
7:32 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
8:33 – Guess Who Tweeted
8:50 – 
6:38- SPORTS- Cardinals first baseman Albert Pujols has overtaken Phillies second baseman Chase Utley as the NL’s leading vote getter in All-Star game voting. Suspended Dodgers outfielder Manny Ramirez is in sixth place among outfielders. 
8:27 – The Art of Manliness: 
6:40 – SPORTS: The Phillies continued their amazing home disappearing act yesterday, 
7:29 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
8:30 – Sixers Dancers, 
6:02 – Danny is feeling much better today. He’s still on a quest to find a Wicked Weather Woman for the show. A woman who is nude while doing the weather on the air. There was an offer from a woman in Florida to do it over the phone, not good enough. Danny’s can’t get a naked woman in the studio, but there’s a photo of his fiancee’s chest in all it’s glory on the internet somewhere. Danny calls her up to alert her to the fact that the photo might be a little too revealing. Under further review it turns out there there’s a lot of cleavage, but no nipplage. It’s the default photo at myspace.com/bonaduce318
6:39 – SPORTS: 
8:30 – Who Would Win In A Fight: Al Bundy or Homer Simpson?
9:26 – Some cavewomen fro 
6:37 – SPORTS: The Phillies squandered second chances in an 
9:08 – Danny is in awe of Megan Fox’s camel toe pictures. He’s a fan of her looks, but not of the words that come out of her mouth. Danny’s had lots of fun with drunken slobs, but they’re only useful for one night. Camel toes are great, unless the girl is big or it’s your girlfriend/wife/mother. Danny thinks that this camel toe is on purpose. Danny and Shila dislike Megan Fox’s camel toe.
6:02 – Danny has pinstriped pants on today. Danny was going to suit today, he normally dresses for fun. However it is nice to wear a suit and not be referred to as ‘the defendant.’ While singing the Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach song in the shower he somehow morphed the words into ‘Danny Bonaduce: Cockroach.’ That could lead to a segment about all the awful things Danny and the audience have done. Danny’s move to Philly came quickly so he doesn’t have a suit or his books in town. Danny found episodes of Gretchen’s television show online and was surprised how mean the comments were on the site. This made Danny smile. Danny is still baffled why Gretchen’s married boyfriend isn’t in a hurry to get a divorce and marry Gretchen. His divorce has been lingering for three years, maybe Kevin and Gretchen can get married in the season finale of the next season. That would get Danny off the alimony hook!
6:36 – SPORTS: A limited number of 
7:33 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
6:01 – Shila is fired up after an early morning argument with Josh the Phone Screener debating Kobe vs. LeBron. Josh’s top speed is 2 mph. Danny got in a good workout while Shila was screaming at Josh. While walking to work Danny got into a conversation with a guy on the street that was insistent that Danny doesn’t live in Philly, which infuriated him. Danny still wants to have one professionally sanctioned fight. He first planned to do this on his 40th birthday, but a broken finger stopped him. Station management think Danny should move on from boxing, but it’s Danny’s hobby and he wants the challenge of a real fight in the ring. Danny was challenged to a boxing match by a journalist in Newark, NJ that’s had a history of being mean to Danny. The journalist sent Danny a photo of himself, but it turned out that it wasn’t really him. The journalist was taller than he let on and he didn’t move so well in the ring. Danny thumped the guy good in a sparring match. Why should Danny quit his hobby? 
8:30 – The Art of Manliness: Arm Wrestling
9:02 – Danny brings Spike in to talk about Michael Irvin because he’s not much of sports guy. Most of the Cowboys were dumb and boring, but Irvin and Dieon Sanders ran their mouths, which made them easier to dislike. Danny was told by multiple people that he has to hate Irvin. Michael tells Danny that he doesn’t have to hate him, there’s already enough ill will in Philly. Michael’s got a new television show that gives an amateur player a chance to play for the Cowboys. Michael knows how seriously Philly takes it’s football when he was crippled on the field and fans were yelling for him to get off the field. Could he hear the fans yelling at him? No. He was thinking about his family when he was laying there and asking God for help. Michael was carjacked by a guy who turned out to be a Cowboys fan and let Michael go. Danny says that Michael is hard to hate. Spike asks if Michael will be wearing one of his loud, ugly suits. Not tonight. 
6:38 – SPORTS: The Eagles announced that the 
7:31 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
Bret Michaels isn't being shy about getting drilled in the face by a backdrop at the Tony Awards on Sunday night. He posted the pictures of his cut up nose and mouth on his 
8:48 – Danny is still fired up about the possibility that could give the government new power to limit nicotine in cigarettes and drastically limit ads. Danny, Shila, and Metro all smoke. Danny doesn’t want the government telling him the amount of alcohol he can have in his drinks and the amount of nicotine he can have in his cigarettes. Shila welcomes the possibility of less addictive cigarettes. The prohibition of alcohol obviously didn’t work, however cigarettes will still be available. Danny doesn’t like his freedom being tampered with. He’s fine with not smoking in bars because it affects other people, but this affects the smoker. 
9:05 – Susan Barnett from CBS3 is on the show to talk about the station’s telethon for 
7:48 – Lindsay, Alex and Kristen of the Eagles Cheerleaders are in the studio; they’re back from a 
9:03 – Danny’s old friend Andy Dick is on the show. He’s not bleeding at the moment, those days are behind him. He’s cleaned up his act and he’s not 11 months sober. Andy’s performing at the 
6:02 – Danny’s voice is shot from playing Guitar Hero all night. Amy’s ‘mean’ sister, Crystal, is staying with Danny and Amy for a few days. Amy’s mom was easy to win over; the sister Crystal was not so easy though. She might not be the mean sister anymore. Laughing Cow cheese was the thing that won her over. To show off Danny drops a cube of the cheese from the third floor of the house to the second, but his aim wasn’t so good and hit her in the forehead. Crystal fell in love with Guitar Hero and one song turned into three hours of a family fun at Danny’s house. Danny is like the Willy Wonka of Philadelphia with his house of candy, cheese, games, and liquor. Crystal declared that it was more like Teen Cribs. 
8:30 – Gene Simmons in on the show now. He was impressed by Danny’s last boxing match, he looked so good in shorts he’d be the most popular boy in jail. Gene once called Danny out on his drinking and Danny thought he was making a big deal over nothing. Two days later Danny was in rehab. Gene has tasted alcohol, he just doesn’t like it. 
8:48 – Danny reads some of 
6:03 – Danny played Guitar Hero until 3am this morning. It’s addictive, but not like crack. He had a great time at Shop Rite promoting Batter Blaster. There were many gracious 50 year-old women who asked Danny for autographs for their grandkids while reinforcing to Danny that they wouldn’t know who he is. That’s an ego booster. Danny has a new love and it’s Batter Blaster. Danny learned to make pancake designs with Batter Blaster, like Mickey Mouse. Jeff the Program Director came out to hang out with Danny and made a partridge with the Batter Blaster, which turned out perfect. The old ladies reinforced that it looked like Danny, even though he doesn’t look like a bird. Danny plans to make breakfast for Shila and Metro, so they can experience the genius of the Batter Blaster. 
6:19 – Corey calls to ask Danny if he ever met Elvis Presley. He knows the answer, but thinks it’s a cool story. Elvis gave Danny a car when he was six years-old. Danny plays a one-man band in a circus in The Trouble With Girls. Danny was walking by Elvis’s trailer on the set with the legs of mannequins all in lingerie and told Danny they were his trophies. Danny was so excited he asked Elvis to show his mom the trophies, which made for an awkward moment. Elvis took a liking to Danny and gave him an electric car as a gift after the movie wrapped. 
8:33 – The Art of Manliess 
8:50 – 
9:07 – Arthur brings up Sex and the City, a show about women dissecting men. Not the most hetro move. Arthur spends hours a day practicing monologues. It sounds like he’s reading. Someone’s not winning an Oscar. Danny goes through some acting tricks for working with the camera on television. Ron calls to say he loves the website, but hates Arthur because he takes arrogance to a new level. Lisa expresses her dislike for Arthur, which fills him with glee. If he’s an actor on the move, why isn’t he in Los Angeles or New York? He wants to ‘build his resume.’ Jim offers Danny money to kick Arthur in the pumpkin patch. Ray calls to say that Arthur’s doing a good job acting like he’s not gay. Steve calls to compliment Danny for breaking Arthur down. Mike calls to say that Arthur has done nothing to give back to the world. Pat calls to ask who Arthur is and why he’s on the air. Arthur says that he pursued the American Dream while giving the world a view of his progress. Arthur doesn’t know the difference between consonants and continents. Consonants are letters and continents are large bodies of land. Danny’s seen more successful people pull off the bit Arthur’s trying to pull off. Arthur is going to tell a funny story….wasn’t so funny. Arthur starts bragging about the times he’s been recognized on the street. Who would be recognized more often, Danny or Arthur? Arthur’s tentative to do it. Don calls to say that Arthur is just like Gretchen, trying to feed off Danny. Danny thinks that Arthur is good at his act, but he needs to be better at it. 
7:32 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
7:50 – WWE Superstar 
9:03 – Kendra Wilkinson is on the show now. She’s got a new show, Kendra, premiering on E! soon. She’s been working with the same producers for six seasons and they allow Kendra to take stuff out of the show if she’s not comfortable with airing. Hank Baskett, her fiancé, wasn’t hot on doing the show at first, but Kendra talked him into it. She’s ready to get married and start a family with Hank, an Eagles WR. After some awkward experiences at Playboy Mansion parties Kendra doesn’t like to sleep naked. All the attention of reality came to her leading up to The Girls Next Door and she tried to keep herself grounded to make sure that she’s prepared for life after television. Danny commends her for being a bright girl and thinking of her future. 
7:32 – Danny Bonaduce: Life Coach
7:51 – 
8:31 – Who Would Win In A Fight: Cheech & Chong vs. Jay and Silent Bob
9:05 – 
6:02 – Danny has a huge Jesus belt buckle today. He may have seen a giant Jesus on the way back from Mike’s Famous Harley Davidson Delaware over the weekend. Calls come in confirming that it could be a giant Jesus statue then public opinion sways and decides it’s a Mary statue. It’s a little ambiguous. Yesterday on his way home from work Danny saw a little girl’s life change forever. Usually he’ll get recognized on the street, but it’s awkward when school teachers on Old City tours recognize Danny and insist that kids who don’t know who he is get their photographs with Danny. Yesterday while going through the routine again a young girl bent over and blew chunks on the street, which turned out to be embarrassing for her. It was a life defining moment for the girl who probably won’t be able to outlive the memory of the being the girl that ralphed on a field trip to Philadelphia. 
7:51 – Vera Ramone-King, 
Earlier this week Danny made fun of the Philadelphia Firebirds, a women’s football team. Now they’re in the lobby ready to made amends. F My Life!
8:42 – There are certain bad movies that Danny can’t pass up when he comes across them on cable television. Vision Quest and The Firm stop him in his tracks. Shila’s movie is Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason. Metro zones in on Mean Girls. 
A 
6:38 – SPORTS: Jamie Moyer went six strong innings to 
8:13 – Smokin’ Joe Frazier is in the studio and Danny is excited. Does it bother Smokin’ Joe that he’s always associated with Ali? They had some amazing battles and Joe doesn’t want to put him down, but Joe had a prolific career of his own. Joe had a bone crushing right hook. The weekend of June 12th Joe is hosting ‘Champs and Stars’ show at Bally’s in Atlantic City to benefit Gilda’s Club, a cancer charity. Lots of celebrities and retired boxers will be there to support Joe and play game shows with him, all for a good cause. 
